First Snow

[arashi_jump09]

Title: First Snow

Author: Natsu-chan (arashi_jump09) & rabuarashi

Length: Oneshot

Paring: Sakuraiba

Rating: PG 15

Genre: Romance,Drama,Angst

Disclaimer:I don't own them (sadly
)  just the fanfic

Summary: It's been one year since they broke up...will it be too late to start again?

A/N: This is my first fanfic and my first collab!! ^^ Thank you very much rabuarashi for doing a collab fic with me and guiding me all the way
I've wrote it long time ago since it was my friend's favorite song, I want to thank you guys, rabuarashi teri12576 sushi4ever for giving me a boost, you really helped me *hugs* <3. To all readers, we hope you like our work

Guidance:"..." Dialogue,'...' Monologue, Italic Flashback



[(Douzo~)]

Sho was going to have an outside interview for Zero one winter afternoon. It was so cold outside. On his way to the location, Sho looked up to the sky when he noticed that it began to snow, “Ahh, it’s already snowing…”

‘…So it’s been a year huh’ The newscaster sighed sadly, watching the snow slowly fell on top of his palm and melted as he continued walking. He tried to ignore the sadness that he felt, pushing it deep to the farthest corner of his heart.

After the filming ended, he had some time to kill so he decided to take a stroll near the place. Not wanting to attract any attention, he tried hiding his face with the muffler, circling it around his neck. It was that time of the year again. The street was full with Christmas decorations.

It had been a while that he celebrated Christmas with someone, celebrating that person’s birthday who happened to fall the day before Christmas. He hesitated but finally he did sent a birthday wish this year, quite a formal one.

Walking passed a few lovers along his way, “Damn, suddenly it feels lonely...” Sho mumbled. The sight of couples and lovers spending their time on during Christmas season is normal. He didn’t think much of it before but seeing everyone with their special someone now made him feel gloomy.

‘If time could be turned back… and I could return to that time... I wonder if it would change everything... If I chose to stopped him that time… would he be next to me now…’ Many if started to come to Sho’s mind as he took a seat on a vacant bench nearby, sighing before he closed his eyes. His mind started to wander deep down the memory lane…

“Oh! There you are Sho-chan! Matsujun is wondering if we would like to go out for dinner together with him. Actually he would like to introduce his new friend to us...well I don’t think it’s a friend though” Aiba giggled as he remembered Jun asking him while blushing like a red tomato.

“No, I’ll pass. I still have work to do... but if you want to, you could go with them.” Sho replied while his eyes stay glued to his laptop.

“Oh, I see... uhm… yeah, I’ll just gonna go tell Jun that…” The other smiled sadly as he left the room but the newscaster failed to see it as he didn’t even spare him a glance.

Sho remembered everything...how he was too absorb in his work and neglecting Aiba in the process. Aiba always said it was fine or it was okay every time he rejected his little request, always trying to be an understanding lover, and still manage to take a good care of him despite his busy schedule. But Sho noticed how Aiba’s eyes were screaming for his attention…his time… his affection… his everything.

‘I guess it’s true what people said… you will only learn to treasure something after it is lost… ” Sho closed his eyes tighter, trying not let the tears fall from his eyes. He wanted to stop thinking about it but the memories kept on flooding.

Sitting on the sofa facing his lover, “Masaki...let’s break up,” Sho said calmly. He glanced to see how Aiba looked so shocked at his sudden request. He had been thinking about it for some times.

“…break…up? Sho-chan, what makes you say that? …Why?” Aiba asked with a voice that was slightly trembling as his beautiful eyes were gleaming with tears.

“I don’t think it is working anymore... I think I need more time for myself... more space” He explained his reasons as he looked straight at Aiba. He noticed how Aiba was trying his best to held everything in, trying his best not to cry in front of him.

“...I’m sorry...” Sho apologized as stood up and headed to their bedroom, leaving Aiba alone in the living.

As soon as Sho walked away, Aiba couldn’t control his tears anymore. The tears that he tried to hold started to fall as he cried his heart out. He wouldn’t have cried that much if he didn’t really love him.

‘Looking at your tears at that time, it seemed as if they were blaming me... I bet you were blaming me…even when you yourself never said anything about it… I was so stupid… I didn’t even have anything to say to make you stay… if only…’ The tears started to fall from his eyes as he began to regret everything all over again.

“I’m going to stay at my friend’s house for a moment before finding some place...thank you Sho-kun” Aiba smiled forcedly as he bowed a little.

“See you at work Aiba-chan” Sho replied nonchalantly, pretending like he didn’t pay much attention as he was preparing for work. He tried not to look as Aiba dragged his bag towards the door.

But as soon as he heard Aiba closed the door, he stopped everything he was doing as he gazed toward his direction his silhouette disappeared and started to question himself if it was the right thing to do or will he regret it later...

Sho was thankful that Aiba was being as professional as he is when it comes to work. He still continued to work normally like he used to the next day after the breakup. But being together for so long, it couldn’t be fooled the other three that easily. Sho received disapproving glances from all of the other members when they heard the news.

“Think more about it Sho-kun... is it really alright to leave Aiba-chan that way?” Ohno said as he walk passed Sho after their recording. Ohno rarely said anything. So for him to make that comment, Sho knew he didn’t really like the decision he made.

Sho couldn’t help but sigh for the nth time, it would be a long day for him... Nino almost punched him if it wasn’t for Ohno being the peacemaker. Jun didn’t say anything but he noticed the deadly glares Jun was giving him from time to time.

“Isn’t okay to be that way? So that both of us can be more focus on our works… besides it’s not like we could get married or anything.” Sho mumbled while picking up his things.

Sho tried being discreet when he wiped his tears with the muffler before he stood up. He took a deep breath and then sighed heavily, trying to heave suffocating feeling out from his chest. Sho always tried to convince himself that it was now in the past and no matter it was useless to be bothered about now.

He said that but when he saw Aiba being friendly with any guy at work, it made his heart ache so bad he was having a hard time hiding it. It started to get even worst each day passed. It had been some times since he had that symptom.

‘Put yourself together Sakurai Sho! You are okay! You fine!’ He tried brainwashing himself. “You need to be fine!” He was surprised when he heard himself as it was blurted out of his mouth without intention.

***

It was his day off tomorrow so the newscaster decided to pay parents a visit. He didn’t want to be alone today. Since he reached his parents’ house quite late, he entered slowly, thinking that his parents must have been sleeping since they usually went to sleep around ten but to his surprise he saw his father in the living room, reading a book with a cup of coffee in his hand.

“Father?” Sho called out to him, making him tearing his attention away from the book he was reading.

“Hey, son! What an unexpected visit... Come in. I was reading this interesting book while waiting for your mom to come back.” His father smiled as he put the book aside.

“Mother is out? At this hour?” Sho asked, thinking it was rare for his mother to be out so late.

“Yes. She went to visit her sick friend. Should be home soon…at least that what she said” His father explained before suddenly asking him in returned, “So why the sudden visit? Everything’s good?”

“It’s my day off actually so I thought of visiting you guys, check how all of you are doing... Work is okay. I still have a few days of concert left for this weekend.” Sho replied, taking a seat on the opposite sofa.

His father next question made his heart jumped. “What about Aiba?” His father asked, staring directly at him.

It made him nervous and a little uncomfortable. It made him wonder if his father was trying to imply something. “Aiba? ...Aiba …Well he… he is doing well but I rarely see him since he got some individual projects too” He replied quite smoothly despite the loud thumping of his heart.

“I’m not talking about that Sho... I mean about your relationship with him. Are you too doing well together? Isn’t today supposed to be his birthday or something?” His father quickly responded.

The newscaster’s eyes widened in shock. It almost felt like his heart was jumping out of his chest. He remembered that he and Aiba decided not to tell his family about their relationship and the latter agreed because he knew how his strict his parents were. They were afraid that his parents might not be able to take the news nicely. Sho always thought that his parents would definitely be against them.

“Wha?!-...wait...how?!?!” Sho wasn’t sure what question should he ask. He was surprised that his father knew about him and Aiba.

“We’re not blind Sho. We saw the way you look at him...  you know, those secret gazes you kept throwing at him, they were quite obvious. And then there’s your answers in your interviews. Plus those what you called it? Ah, fanservices... We are your parents Sho, not your fans. It’s not that we can see it through you... because you're our son, so it’s obvious to us.” Sho was surprised to see his father was smiling the whole explanation.

“You’re not mad? Or Disgusted? Are you disappointed with me?” Sho questioned him.

“Well… in the family you’re always the one who’s exceeding our expectation… both in good and bad ways... being a brat to your mom and entering Johnny’s without informing us... being so stubborn and refused to follow what we arranged for you but still managed to get a degree while being a super idol… you are you… You are still our son” His father sighed happily as he recalled those memories.

It made him a bit teary hearing his father’s talk. “Father…” Sho couldn’t find any words to reply back.

“So the two of you are not in good terms lately?” His father started to question again.

He decided to come clean so he told his father what really happened. “No...We broke up a year ago... actually I broke up with him” Sho stated sadly, unable to hide the regret he was feeling.

When he saw the surprised look in his father eyes, he began to explain everything. He somehow felt like a big burden had been lifted from his heart. He had been keeping it inside for so long that it started to tear him apart.

“So that’s what happened!” His father commented before he to laugh, making Sho frowned at his reaction.

Probably noticing the change on his expression, his father then explained, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to laugh but I somehow remembered myself in you... You know, after I was married to your mother we have the same issues. I was too drown in work and before I knew it I became a workaholic. Then I started to neglect your mom... we almost had a divorce but luckily you grandfather beat the sense out of me” His father laughed as he told him the story. Sho stared at him amusingly as it was the first time he heard the story.

“You know what I learned Sho? ...That love is like a business, you need to know your priorities and to take the risk whenever you can because just like in every business transaction, sometimes there will be a gain and sometimes there will be a loss. But it’s just up to you how will you manage and take care of it... it is just a short explanation but that’s how I realized it... so now young man I suggest you to go and get him back. If you really love that is.” His father then added, smiling at him when he said that.

“But what if it’s already too late for me? What if he doesn’t love me anymore? After all I took him for granted all those years…and I left him without any explanations…” Sho voiced out his doubts. Despite all his father’s advise, he was still scared. It wasn’t that he never thought of getting back together with Aiba, but he kept thinking that Aiba wouldn’t accept him back seeing how well he was doing nowadays, so he started to lose hope.

“You never change Sho...still as stubborn and you are still like to think too much into things. As always. Too much logic. You know, love is never about logic.” His mother’s voice startled him. He turned to see his mother was smiling as she leaned against the wall next to him.

“Mother! How long have you’ve been there?” Sho asked, feeling a little embarrassed being caught pouring his heart out like that.

“Well, long enough to hear everything... I never thought that you broke up with that sweet angel. Seriously Sho, don’t wait until it’s too late. If you still like him like what you said, you should get him back before you regret everything. You know, because when the time comes and he’s gone for good, no matter how loud you shout or cry, he won’t be able hear you anymore. I know you still love him. Why suffer when you still have a chance to make it right?” His mother provoked as she sat beside him, placing a hand on his shoulder.

It made him thinking. What she said was true. It gave him quite a motivation to get Aiba back. Sho took a deep breath and huffed it out. He then turned to his mother and hugged her before he went and hugged his father too, thanking both of them for being so understanding and supportive, when he needed it the most.

He stood up of his seat, ready to go to Aiba’s house and this time he determined that he was going to take him back no matter what. Sho thanked his parents again, “Thank you!” smiling as he wiped the tears that fell suddenly.

***

Sho didn’t know what to do as he was so nervous to press the doorbell. He started to hesitate but his heart kept yelling at him to just press the button and stop wasting the time anymore. Sho bit his lip, as kept reaching out for the button only to withdrawn his hand a few seconds later.

When he saw his watch, it was almost twelve midnight, "Oh, I forgot it's already this late. Maybe I should've do it tomorrow…" Sho mumbled. He started to shiver as he forgot to wear a coat and was mentally scold himself when suddenly the door opened.

"Sho-kun?" Aiba was surprised to see him standing there in front of his door. Aiba was wearing his pajama and his hair was a bit messy.

"Hi! I was just… uh… taking a walk. I should have come tomorrow. Bye." Sho cursed himself for being saying something that obviously not making any sense.

Aiba quickly grabbed his arm, stopping him from leaving as the taller guy invited him in, "No, it's okay. Please come in. It must so important that you even forgot to wear a coat." Aiba chuckled towards the end of his comment. It made him a little embarrassed yet he was feeling happy to hear his sweet laugh. He missed it.

Sho just followed Aiba into the house. After he took a seat, Aiba disappeared for a while and came back with a hot chocolate in his both hands and a blanket hanging in his left arm. Sho murmured his gratitude as he took the hot chocolate and a blanket Aiba was giving him.

"Something happened Sho-kun?" Aiba started the conversation as he took a seat not so close beside him. Sho was aware of the distance. He wished Aiba would sit a little closer.

Sho glanced at Aiba, thinking of what to answer. He thought for a minute but he couldn’t think of any excuse. Sho place his cup of hot chocolate on the table before he turned to face Aiba. He stared at him and before he knew it the sentence came out his lips naturally, "Masaki, I’m sorry for treating you that way… I mean for neglecting all those years…."

Aiba looked surprised at his sudden confession. "Sho... but It was all in the past now, right?” Aiba said to him softly as he looked away.

“But-“ He wanted to say something but Aiba was quicker to cut him before he could, “Please don't be bothered by it anymore…”

"No! Masaki listen to me! I-” Sho tried to make him listen.

But Aiba immediately cut him off again. “Sho please. You said it loud and clear the last time. You don’t need to worry about me. I totally understand your reasons."
Sho grabbed Aiba’s arm, trying to make him turned his way, “Masaki, I'm sorry for leaving you, I’m sorry not giving you enough explanations, I'm sorry for taking you for granted, I'm sorry for neglecting you, I am sorry for being so cold to you when all you did was being a good lover for me but most of all...I'm sorry for being selfish and gave up on us when you never did… please forgive me…" Sho just voiced out whatever his heart was telling him. Everything. He didn't care anymore about his pride or whatever. He just want Aiba back into his life
.
"Sho-kun..." Aiba looked at Sho in surprise. He watched as the other hung his head down, and he could tell how serious Sho was as he could feel the hand that was grabbing him trembling. It made his heart weakened as he still loved the man in front of him. So very much that he didn’t know what to do.

His heart sank when he saw tears in Sho’s eyes at the other man gazed directly at him. "Masaki, I miss your beautiful smile, I miss hearing your breathy laugh, I miss waking up next to you in the morning, I miss you calling me 'my sho-chan'… I miss everything about you… Masaki, please… I just want you ba-"

The confession was too much for his heart to bear, he thought he would die of happiness. He wanted to hear the rest but he really wanted to kiss him. Aiba cut Sho by pressing his lips against the newscaster as he circled his arms around neck. Sho was surprised for a second but as soon as he recovered, he swiftly pulled Aiba closer by the younger man's hips and started to kiss him back deeply, passionately.

Their kiss was full of their longing for each other, as well as their love. When they finally pulled apart, they realized that they were both crying and smiling at the same time. Sho pulled Aiba for another kissed, this time a little deeper and a longer as they devoured each other’s mouth. They were both breathless when they pulled apart as they gazed lovingly and lustfully into each other’s eyes.

Masaki stood up, "We have all the time tomorrow Sho-chan. Let’s go and find you some clothes to wear. You’re staying over right?" Aiba asked as wiped his happy tears, laughing a little as he pulled Sho towards the bedroom.

***

When they laid in the bed, still a little breathless after their sweet passionate love making,  Sho took Aiba into his arms, hugging him,  thankful that he was be able to by his beloved side once again. It was the best night in his life as he felt complete with Aiba in his arms.

“Please believe in my determination to change for you... I was stupid before… but I realized now that you are my sunny sunshine… my breath that forever giving me the courage to love… I love you, Masaki” Sho whispered as look into Aiba’s eyes before he leaned forward and softly kissed his on the forehead.

It made Aiba blushed at Sho’s sweet confession. “Idiot...I love you too” Masaki whispered back, hugging Sho back a little tighter as he sighed happily... Before they knew it, they fell asleep with a content smile plastered on their faces.

*AND THEY LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER XD THE END*

Soooo? what do you think? I would really like to know
Oh! and pleasee be nice with the comments *bows* :D