Salutations!
It has been a long time! I have come back older and wiser, and while I doubt anyone reads this anymore, I have come to the conclusion that keeping a journal can be enjoyable and can do wonders for ones own self perception, when entries are read years afterwards.
I went to my cousins wedding yesterday. For someone with a rather severe case of social anxiety... it was a bit awkward.
THEY EXPECTED... ME... TO DANCE!
Though I doubt my clap n' stoop failed to charm any of the middle aged women there, I felt I successfully filled my quota of Dance, and I retreated to our table to discuss with my Grandfather the wonders of the dessert bar.
I guess it's strange.... it just hard for me to have a good time at these things. I suppose it made me realize I don't really know my cousins on my Fathers side all that well. Which is a stark comparison to my cousins on my mothers side, who are some of my closest friends.
I think it wouldn't be too far fetched to say it is the age difference, about 15 years apart.
That's the excuse I've been holding on to for a few years... but i've recently come to a different conclusion.
I am ashamed of my childhood.
Yeah, weird, huh?
anyone that was a teenager while I was a child, I have a hard time..... relating to? I don't know if that is quite the right word.
I don't know why. Do I expect that I should have behaved as an adult when I was 6? Do I think that people are judging me, and thinking I am a child because they knew me as one?
Hmm.... I'll think on this one. Goodnight! Hopefully it won't take another 2 years to update!
I went to my cousins wedding yesterday. For someone with a rather severe case of social anxiety... it was a bit awkward.
THEY EXPECTED... ME... TO DANCE!
Though I doubt my clap n' stoop failed to charm any of the middle aged women there, I felt I successfully filled my quota of Dance, and I retreated to our table to discuss with my Grandfather the wonders of the dessert bar.
I guess it's strange.... it just hard for me to have a good time at these things. I suppose it made me realize I don't really know my cousins on my Fathers side all that well. Which is a stark comparison to my cousins on my mothers side, who are some of my closest friends.
I think it wouldn't be too far fetched to say it is the age difference, about 15 years apart.
That's the excuse I've been holding on to for a few years... but i've recently come to a different conclusion.
I am ashamed of my childhood.
Yeah, weird, huh?
anyone that was a teenager while I was a child, I have a hard time..... relating to? I don't know if that is quite the right word.
I don't know why. Do I expect that I should have behaved as an adult when I was 6? Do I think that people are judging me, and thinking I am a child because they knew me as one?
Hmm.... I'll think on this one. Goodnight! Hopefully it won't take another 2 years to update!