Israel, a Waste of Time

Jan 06, 2008 17:00

I got back from the Holy Land yesterday. I had an amazing time there. I hadn't been back to my homeland in 8 years and a lot has changed there since then. My parents arrived there a week before me. It was my father's first time back since we left in 1990. He barely recognized his country! My arrival was supposed to be a surprise for the rest of my family there but I ended up being surprised. I was told that that my parents would pick me up and that my father would be holding up a sign saying "Doctor Schaffhausen". The name comes from the movie Dirty Rotten Scoundrels and the reason for it was that I have always wanted someone to wait for me at an airport. Usually, I walk out of the airport in Montreal and wait for my parents' Ford to show up.

I ended up being surprised because I didn't see my father and his sign. Instead, I first spotted my grandfather, then my aunts, uncles, cousins, and grandmother. My parents brought up the rear with my father holding up the "Doctor Schaffhausen" sign. Let's just say that I was disoriented!

I was in Israel from the 27th to January 5th. I had a great time seeing family and touring the country. It's so small that I managed to stand on the country's northern tip, drove within several meters of Israel's border with the Gaza Strip, and touch the Western Wall in Jerusalem.

From the minute I got there, this one expression was uttered constantly by almost everyone: what a waste of time.
A sample conversation:
A: How was the show last night?
B: What a waste of time!
It means the opposite of what it literally means.

Some highlights:

* I flew to Israel through Milan. On my way from Milan to Tel Aviv, the flight attendant asked for a doctor because one of the passengers in another section of the plane was experiencing chest pains. No doctor appeared but the man's chest pains subsided. On the way back to New York, the woman in the row in front of me fainted as she got up from her seat. I rushed to a flight attendant who checked her pulse and held her head up. She fainted because she was allergic to the pasta she ate.

* While Israelis do celebrate New Year's in many pubs and clubs, there's no TV coverage of the event. So, instead, my grandparents counted down to the New Year through Russian TV. At midnight Moscow time, which was 11pm Israel time, we toasted to the New Year. At midnight, I scanned through the channels looking for Israeli coverage but found nothing.

* We drove through the Golan Heights and visited Israel's northernmost city, Metulla.

* I met one of my father's only relatives, a cousin twice removed. He was a parachutist in the Israeli army and he fought in several of the country's wars. He gave us a tour of the area just to the north of Israel's border with the Gaza Strip. We drove through Sderot, a town located one kilometer from the border with Gaza and which is constantly being hit with rockets fired from the Strip. Several rockets hit the town a few hours before we arrived and after we left.

* I visited Jerusalem which I find to be a very beautiful city. The city has a municipal rule which states that all buildings must be built using Jerusalem stone. Wikipedia describes the stone as "usually golden or pinkish in hue, although some varieties are grey or off-white".

* My parents drove me to the neighborhood where I grew up. I saw the old apartment where we lived and the kindergarten and elementary school where I studied. The neighborhood has changed dramatically but the apartment building and elementary school still remain. We also ate at this restaurant that my parents used to frequent once a month while they lived together before I was born. Long live nostalgia!

* Israel is obsessed with shopping malls. So, we saw several of them while we were there. We also visited several markets, which are shouks in Hebrew. They are made up of lots of stands with lots of cool stuff and everyone's yelling discounts to try and get your attention.
Previous post Next post
Up