Fic: Confession
Title: Confession
Author: Yours truly
Rating: Nc-17
Pairing: Dima/Awa, implied Lordi/Dima, Lordi/Awa, Lordi/Dima/Awa
Summary: In the aftermath, a confession
Warnings. all the usual apply
AN: Part of the Toys series, follows COllar. also, this has been sitting on my HD way too long. aplogies for the wait.
Later, Dima did not remember much of how he left the throne room. He could recall snatches of it - pulling Awa to his arms, the doors of her chambers opening before him, the way her hands clutched his shoulders - but here and now, with Awa’s sleeping form in his arms... he wondered if any of it had even happened.
She felt so wonderful, soft and supple in his arms, her ashen skin cool against his as she shifted, a small sound escaping her lips; he wondered if it was of pain. Clean of blood, the deep slashes from Lordi’s claws upon her skin were eve more prominent, and he couldn’t help but wonder if they would scar... he didn’t think so since the wounds left by his sire’s whip had left no marks… unlike the ones he’d inflicted on him.
Dima shivered, tightening his hold of her, the feel of his collar around his neck heavy. What Lordi had done, the way he had hurt her… it frightened him. He knew he cared so very much for Awa, more than he had ever thought possible.
“I never want to let you go,” he whispered into her raven hair, knowing she would not hear him. “I want to be with you always, Awa… you mean so much to me.”
He licked his lips. “Ever since I first saw you, you intrigued me… I wanted you, and when I first kissed you… God, Awa, I think, no, I know…”
He closed his eyes, blinking away tears of mixed emotion. “I love you.”
He felt her stiffen in his arms. “You… what?”
**
Drifting in the land between sleep and awareness, Awa found herself pushed into a jumble of mixed emotion and thought as Dima’s words drifted into her ears.
I love you.
“I love you,” he repeated, his dark eyes meeting hers. “With all my heart:”
She couldn’t breathe. “You can’t,” she whispered, unable to look away. This couldn’t be true, sweet, sweet Dima was surely mistaken... he could not love her.
“Yes I can,” He whispered. “Please, let me love you, my sweet lady?”
“How can you?” she whispered, feeling the heat of tears in her eyes.
“How can I not?” he murmured. “You are incredible, so beautiful, wonderful, bright. You have my heart, lady, have had ever since I first kissed you.”
“You shouldn’t,” Awa said, the feelings she had been shutting away for so long slowly starting to break through her barriers. “I belong to my liege. He has my body and soul.”
“Can I have your heart?” Dima whispered, the hope in his voice and eyes unbearably bright. “He has me, too - we will never be anything but his, I know that. But we can still... have this. Have each other.”
Awa felt tears slowly starting to trail down her cheeks as she closed her eyes, unable to look at him. She was so very afraid that this was nothing but a cruel trick of insanity, to have her Sweetling Dima tell her he cared for her so much…. She was so very afraid to let he heart be anything but a blackened husk, devoted to serving her liege with all she was….
“Yes,” she whispered, her fangs biting into her lips. “You have my heart, sweetling. For what it’s worth when I am…”
“When you are a monster?” he whispered, his lips brushing her forehead. “I don’t care.”
”I belong to another, Sweetling,” she reminded him gently, unable to help but press closer to him. “My liege…”
”Has me in his thrall also, my lady,” Dima said softly, stroking her hair; the endearment he’d picked for her made her feel a flush creep on her cheeks, as if she were still mortal. “He will not deny us.”
**
Dima tightened his hold of her as she shivered; his lips brushed her hair again, his heart beating just a little faster.
The small yes she had whispered made him feel elated; to have her heart, to have her love… there was no price too high to pay for that. Even if he was…
“Bound to him, by him, forever and ever,” Awa was whispering, her voice growing louder by every word as her body grew tense in his arms. “Always in his thrall, at his feet… so many chains, so many bonds!”
Dima felt a surge of fear as Awa’s voice rose, her hands clenching into fists as she began to thrash in his arms, what was wrong? “Lady?”
Awa shrieked shrilly he sound cutting into Dima’s ears; for a moment his hold of her loosened and it was all it took - she struggled fee of him, rising from the bed as if she had been not hurt at all.
“Awa?” Dima whispered, his jaw dropping as she spun around the room, her feet barely touching the floor - her eyes gleamed with unholy fire, her raven locks tangling around her body as shrill laughter bubbled from her throat, tinged with something... inhuman.
“Whips and chains, pleasure and pain, my liege is so very generous!” Awa cried, “Little Dima, loves all, his claws and teeth and burning touch… shattered and remade…”
Dima started, realization hitting him; she didn’t know what she was saying, what she was doing as her hand swept the vase of dead roses from the desk - it was her insanity, the ever-pervasive madness that had taken hold of her, that was making her hands clutch her shoulders, tearing open Lordi’s claw marks anew…
“Stop,” Dima cried out as got up from the bed, stalking towards her. “Awa!”
She laughed, spinning around and pouncing at him, wrapping her arms around his neck.
“Dance with your lady, sweetling?” She cooed, her eyes still ablaze. “Take me to the stars?”
Dima couldn’t help it; he took hold of her as he kissed her, pulling her close to his body. “I will dance with you,” he whispered, laughter matching hers starting to bubble free. “My lady Awa.”
He never felt the shards cutting his feet.
**
The first thing she became aware of was Dima’s strong heartbeat beneath her cheek.
Awa smiled, not opening her eyes as she nuzzled his chest. His gentle hold made her feel so warm and alive, as if two centuries had not passed since she’d been mortal… sweet Dima who loved her…
She could remember his confession of love, could remember…. fragments.
She shivered a little. She remembered the madness taking hold - she remembered Dima spinning her around the room, collapsing on the bed on top of him, how he’d made her beg as he took her, so very hard and insistent, his laughter so sweet in her ears…
The taste of his blood still lingered on her lips from lathing onto the wound on his wrist; he’s moaned s prettily when she’d done so, his fingers curling hard in her hair…
Awa whimpered at the memory; it aroused her, heat gathering at the pit of her stomach. But in her madness she had not felt the claw marks and bites, the bruises left by her liege’s handling; now, they made her entire body ache in myriad of ways.
“Something wrong, my lady?” Dima whispered, his lips brushing her hair, startling Awa, she had not realized he had come awake.
“No,” she whispered, pressing closer to him. She couldn’t help it, despite the pain she wanted him, she wanted him to make love to her without madness tinting everything red and brittle.
His hand came to brush a stray lock from her face and without thinking, she kissed the inside of his wrist tenderly; he stilled, and for a moment Awa feared she had done wrong.
“Don’t stop,” He whispered hoarsely, tightening his hold of her, his nails biting into her tender skin.
Awa shivered, “Yes, sweetling,” she murmured against his flesh, closing her eyes as she began to slowly kiss his wrist, the skin so warm and alive under her lips.. she couldn’t help but flick out her tongue to taste, to reach around to where the cut started…
Dima moaned encouragingly, twisting his arm to give her better access; Awa whimpered gratefully, her teeth grazing against the wound to draw blood again; only a little, but the taste of it, so sweet and hot on her was so very intoxicating… and she knew her Sweetling loved the feel of her tongue lapping at his wounds, a sensation she, too, was familiar with.
She whimpered when his hand slid between her legs, softly stoking her inner thigh before trailing upwards to find her eagerness for him. The wicked touch of his fingers had her back arching in pleasure within moments.
“You feel so damn good,” He murmured pulling his wrist away from her; Awa’s disappointed moan was swallowed in a long, tender kiss, his hand tangling in her hair.
**
Awa’s lips were as sweet as death as Dima kissed her; he thought he could keep going forever, drinking the whimpering noises she made as his hand slowly teased her tender flesh. She was so wonderfully willing as she squirmed in his arms, having bought his arousal into full force with her talented tongue.
His wrist throbbed and he groaned, tightening his grip of Awa’s hair. He wanted to just push her down and take her, make her scream.. but some part of him knew now - unlike before? - that she’d been hurt by Lordi and he would have to be tender with her…
He had nothing against that.
She cried out when he withdrew his fingers without bringing her t completion, the look on her face was pleading as she moaned, her golden eyes meeting his. “Please…”
Dima smiled as his hands came to grasp her, to push her on her back as he kissed her: she tasted death-sweet as he kissed her lips, her neck, slowly starting to work his way down her body.
Her hands tried to come to grasp him but he pinned her wrists down as he nipped gently a the tip of her breast, his tongue soothing right after. She whimpered, her back arching as he slowly laved his way down her flat stomach to where her thighs eagerly parted.
She tasted indescribable on his tongue, sending deep shivers of lust down his back as he lavished attention on her tender flesh. He wanted to make... everything up to her, her liege’s rough treatment, they way he had taken her so roughly when she had been in the grip of her insanity and inflicted it upon him as well…
He lost count of the times Awa cried out in pleasure, her body trembling with release upon release; it wasn’t until he could take no more that he surged up, catching her lips in a hungry kiss.
They both moaned into the kiss as he entered her; she was so wet and willing, her hips meeting his thrust for thrust as he drove into her cool body; it did not take long for her to reach her completion again, pulling him along over the edge of bliss.
As they came down from their high he gathered her against his chest; she smiled at him, gesturing languidly and the covers rose to gently lie over them.
“I love you, my lady,” Dima whispered, kissing her forehead-
She closed her eyes, a smile of contentment on her face. “And I you, sweetling.”
Author: Yours truly
Rating: Nc-17
Pairing: Dima/Awa, implied Lordi/Dima, Lordi/Awa, Lordi/Dima/Awa
Summary: In the aftermath, a confession
Warnings. all the usual apply
AN: Part of the Toys series, follows COllar. also, this has been sitting on my HD way too long. aplogies for the wait.
Later, Dima did not remember much of how he left the throne room. He could recall snatches of it - pulling Awa to his arms, the doors of her chambers opening before him, the way her hands clutched his shoulders - but here and now, with Awa’s sleeping form in his arms... he wondered if any of it had even happened.
She felt so wonderful, soft and supple in his arms, her ashen skin cool against his as she shifted, a small sound escaping her lips; he wondered if it was of pain. Clean of blood, the deep slashes from Lordi’s claws upon her skin were eve more prominent, and he couldn’t help but wonder if they would scar... he didn’t think so since the wounds left by his sire’s whip had left no marks… unlike the ones he’d inflicted on him.
Dima shivered, tightening his hold of her, the feel of his collar around his neck heavy. What Lordi had done, the way he had hurt her… it frightened him. He knew he cared so very much for Awa, more than he had ever thought possible.
“I never want to let you go,” he whispered into her raven hair, knowing she would not hear him. “I want to be with you always, Awa… you mean so much to me.”
He licked his lips. “Ever since I first saw you, you intrigued me… I wanted you, and when I first kissed you… God, Awa, I think, no, I know…”
He closed his eyes, blinking away tears of mixed emotion. “I love you.”
He felt her stiffen in his arms. “You… what?”
**
Drifting in the land between sleep and awareness, Awa found herself pushed into a jumble of mixed emotion and thought as Dima’s words drifted into her ears.
I love you.
“I love you,” he repeated, his dark eyes meeting hers. “With all my heart:”
She couldn’t breathe. “You can’t,” she whispered, unable to look away. This couldn’t be true, sweet, sweet Dima was surely mistaken... he could not love her.
“Yes I can,” He whispered. “Please, let me love you, my sweet lady?”
“How can you?” she whispered, feeling the heat of tears in her eyes.
“How can I not?” he murmured. “You are incredible, so beautiful, wonderful, bright. You have my heart, lady, have had ever since I first kissed you.”
“You shouldn’t,” Awa said, the feelings she had been shutting away for so long slowly starting to break through her barriers. “I belong to my liege. He has my body and soul.”
“Can I have your heart?” Dima whispered, the hope in his voice and eyes unbearably bright. “He has me, too - we will never be anything but his, I know that. But we can still... have this. Have each other.”
Awa felt tears slowly starting to trail down her cheeks as she closed her eyes, unable to look at him. She was so very afraid that this was nothing but a cruel trick of insanity, to have her Sweetling Dima tell her he cared for her so much…. She was so very afraid to let he heart be anything but a blackened husk, devoted to serving her liege with all she was….
“Yes,” she whispered, her fangs biting into her lips. “You have my heart, sweetling. For what it’s worth when I am…”
“When you are a monster?” he whispered, his lips brushing her forehead. “I don’t care.”
”I belong to another, Sweetling,” she reminded him gently, unable to help but press closer to him. “My liege…”
”Has me in his thrall also, my lady,” Dima said softly, stroking her hair; the endearment he’d picked for her made her feel a flush creep on her cheeks, as if she were still mortal. “He will not deny us.”
**
Dima tightened his hold of her as she shivered; his lips brushed her hair again, his heart beating just a little faster.
The small yes she had whispered made him feel elated; to have her heart, to have her love… there was no price too high to pay for that. Even if he was…
“Bound to him, by him, forever and ever,” Awa was whispering, her voice growing louder by every word as her body grew tense in his arms. “Always in his thrall, at his feet… so many chains, so many bonds!”
Dima felt a surge of fear as Awa’s voice rose, her hands clenching into fists as she began to thrash in his arms, what was wrong? “Lady?”
Awa shrieked shrilly he sound cutting into Dima’s ears; for a moment his hold of her loosened and it was all it took - she struggled fee of him, rising from the bed as if she had been not hurt at all.
“Awa?” Dima whispered, his jaw dropping as she spun around the room, her feet barely touching the floor - her eyes gleamed with unholy fire, her raven locks tangling around her body as shrill laughter bubbled from her throat, tinged with something... inhuman.
“Whips and chains, pleasure and pain, my liege is so very generous!” Awa cried, “Little Dima, loves all, his claws and teeth and burning touch… shattered and remade…”
Dima started, realization hitting him; she didn’t know what she was saying, what she was doing as her hand swept the vase of dead roses from the desk - it was her insanity, the ever-pervasive madness that had taken hold of her, that was making her hands clutch her shoulders, tearing open Lordi’s claw marks anew…
“Stop,” Dima cried out as got up from the bed, stalking towards her. “Awa!”
She laughed, spinning around and pouncing at him, wrapping her arms around his neck.
“Dance with your lady, sweetling?” She cooed, her eyes still ablaze. “Take me to the stars?”
Dima couldn’t help it; he took hold of her as he kissed her, pulling her close to his body. “I will dance with you,” he whispered, laughter matching hers starting to bubble free. “My lady Awa.”
He never felt the shards cutting his feet.
**
The first thing she became aware of was Dima’s strong heartbeat beneath her cheek.
Awa smiled, not opening her eyes as she nuzzled his chest. His gentle hold made her feel so warm and alive, as if two centuries had not passed since she’d been mortal… sweet Dima who loved her…
She could remember his confession of love, could remember…. fragments.
She shivered a little. She remembered the madness taking hold - she remembered Dima spinning her around the room, collapsing on the bed on top of him, how he’d made her beg as he took her, so very hard and insistent, his laughter so sweet in her ears…
The taste of his blood still lingered on her lips from lathing onto the wound on his wrist; he’s moaned s prettily when she’d done so, his fingers curling hard in her hair…
Awa whimpered at the memory; it aroused her, heat gathering at the pit of her stomach. But in her madness she had not felt the claw marks and bites, the bruises left by her liege’s handling; now, they made her entire body ache in myriad of ways.
“Something wrong, my lady?” Dima whispered, his lips brushing her hair, startling Awa, she had not realized he had come awake.
“No,” she whispered, pressing closer to him. She couldn’t help it, despite the pain she wanted him, she wanted him to make love to her without madness tinting everything red and brittle.
His hand came to brush a stray lock from her face and without thinking, she kissed the inside of his wrist tenderly; he stilled, and for a moment Awa feared she had done wrong.
“Don’t stop,” He whispered hoarsely, tightening his hold of her, his nails biting into her tender skin.
Awa shivered, “Yes, sweetling,” she murmured against his flesh, closing her eyes as she began to slowly kiss his wrist, the skin so warm and alive under her lips.. she couldn’t help but flick out her tongue to taste, to reach around to where the cut started…
Dima moaned encouragingly, twisting his arm to give her better access; Awa whimpered gratefully, her teeth grazing against the wound to draw blood again; only a little, but the taste of it, so sweet and hot on her was so very intoxicating… and she knew her Sweetling loved the feel of her tongue lapping at his wounds, a sensation she, too, was familiar with.
She whimpered when his hand slid between her legs, softly stoking her inner thigh before trailing upwards to find her eagerness for him. The wicked touch of his fingers had her back arching in pleasure within moments.
“You feel so damn good,” He murmured pulling his wrist away from her; Awa’s disappointed moan was swallowed in a long, tender kiss, his hand tangling in her hair.
**
Awa’s lips were as sweet as death as Dima kissed her; he thought he could keep going forever, drinking the whimpering noises she made as his hand slowly teased her tender flesh. She was so wonderfully willing as she squirmed in his arms, having bought his arousal into full force with her talented tongue.
His wrist throbbed and he groaned, tightening his grip of Awa’s hair. He wanted to just push her down and take her, make her scream.. but some part of him knew now - unlike before? - that she’d been hurt by Lordi and he would have to be tender with her…
He had nothing against that.
She cried out when he withdrew his fingers without bringing her t completion, the look on her face was pleading as she moaned, her golden eyes meeting his. “Please…”
Dima smiled as his hands came to grasp her, to push her on her back as he kissed her: she tasted death-sweet as he kissed her lips, her neck, slowly starting to work his way down her body.
Her hands tried to come to grasp him but he pinned her wrists down as he nipped gently a the tip of her breast, his tongue soothing right after. She whimpered, her back arching as he slowly laved his way down her flat stomach to where her thighs eagerly parted.
She tasted indescribable on his tongue, sending deep shivers of lust down his back as he lavished attention on her tender flesh. He wanted to make... everything up to her, her liege’s rough treatment, they way he had taken her so roughly when she had been in the grip of her insanity and inflicted it upon him as well…
He lost count of the times Awa cried out in pleasure, her body trembling with release upon release; it wasn’t until he could take no more that he surged up, catching her lips in a hungry kiss.
They both moaned into the kiss as he entered her; she was so wet and willing, her hips meeting his thrust for thrust as he drove into her cool body; it did not take long for her to reach her completion again, pulling him along over the edge of bliss.
As they came down from their high he gathered her against his chest; she smiled at him, gesturing languidly and the covers rose to gently lie over them.
“I love you, my lady,” Dima whispered, kissing her forehead-
She closed her eyes, a smile of contentment on her face. “And I you, sweetling.”