Heart in a Bubble 2/2

[aquila_star]

Part One


149

“Draco, look!” Harry's hand on my arm made me jump, but I quickly turned in the direction he was looking. I had to close my eyes and open them again, to convince myself what I was seeing was real.

Yet there they were...in all their glory. I could see five mermaids, several of them very old. Their hair was rather impressive as the clan didn't believe that hair should be cut, at all. It was an easy way of judging age, not to mention it made a rather striking effect when it spread through the water behind them. They were gathered in a circle around a youngish-looking mermaid, who was very clearly pregnant.

“Whoa!” Harry exclaimed, in reaction to her belly, which had rippled rather ominously. She let out a wail, a sound that haunts me to this day. It was pure primal agony and determination, and it was as stunning as it was terrifying. Suddenly, her belly rippled again until there, before our eyes, a gill split open, projecting a mess of fluid and tissue into the water.

“Ugh,” I said, pulling back with a look of disgust, which I shared with Harry before turning back to the spectacle in front of us. I was almost certain that I knew what was happening, but I couldn't be sure until...yes, there!

One of the older mermaids reached down into the cloud and plucked out an infant. Harry gasped and grabbed my hand, his grip strong enough to bruise. I pulled his hand off my wrist forcefully, twining our fingers instead, not taking my eyes off the mother and infant. The child was already at its mother’s breast, having used its already strong tail to propel itself into the proper position. The others looked at them with adoration, while the mother looked stunned.

I understood. I felt rather stunned myself. Finally I blinked, looking away to Harry, who was still staring enraptured at the group.

“Harry?” I said, giving his hand a squeeze and trying not to notice how right it felt in mine.

“Mmm,” he replied, still transfixed.

“Come on Harry, we have to get going,” I insisted, tugging him away. “Let's give them some privacy.”

“Oh, okay,” he said, following me back to the dome, his focus clearly still on the mermaids, as his frequent glances back confirmed.

We arrived, climbed in and stripped out of our wetsuits, hanging them up and then checking our equipment. He was still distracted, barely responding to my questions. I could tell the experience had moved him, as it had me.

“Dinner?” I prompted, nudging him with my shoulder as we were leaving the room.

“Sure, sounds great,” he said absentmindedly. “I'll be down there in a few, I just need to...I'll see ya.”

He headed down the corridor toward the dorm, leaving me staring after him.

He joined me in the kitchen before long, and quietly began helping me throw together our meal. We worked in silence, both of us rather preoccupied....he with whatever had got into his head and me with him.

We ate in the same comfortable silence. By the time I was done, I couldn't stand it anymore. I had to know what was bothering him, but I knew he would never volunteer. Asking wouldn't be enough: I'd probably have to drag it out of him. He was remarkably stubborn, a trait that had no doubt served him well during his life, but I was more persistent than he was stubborn.

"What is it?" I asked, having pushed my plate away and settled back in my chair. He looked up at me questioningly and then shrugged.

"What is what?" he replied.

"Whatever it is that's been bothering you since we saw the mermaid give birth. You've been rather...distracted," I explained, pinning him with a firm look. "So what is it?"

"Oh, it's, uh...it's really nothing," he said, pushing his chair back and then taking both our plates to the sink.

"Come on, Harry, I know something's weighing on your mind. Tell me. After all, there's no one else to talk to here," I said, my eyes tracking his progress across the room. He left the dishes and went to the fridge, taking out a bottle of beer and holding it up in offer. I nodded, so he took two. He opened them both before finally coming back to the table, sliding a bottle to me.

"Cheers," I said, lifting the bottle in salute before I took a long pull on it. "Mmm," I said, closing my eyes for a moment and savouring it. "Alexander Keith's Premium White. I won't settle for anything else."

"I bet you won't," he said with a grin. "You ruddy snob."

"I am not a snob, thank you very much," I replied, taking another sip. Damn, but it was good. "I'm just particular about what I put into my body."

"And on your body, and all around you," he rattled off, counting on his fingers like it was some exhaustive list. I glared at him and he laughed. "No, you're a snob all right," he said when he stopped. "Admit it."

"I most certainly will not," I declared. "Not all of us are uncouth, uncivilized apes. Some of us have standards."

"If you say so," he said, smiling at me, his eyes dancing with amusement. God, his eyes. I smiled back, quirking an eyebrow imperiously.

"Believe what you must, Potter," I said. "If it makes you feel better."

"It does," he replied. We sat in silence again, for a few minutes. I was sure he thought I'd forgotten the question, he was so good at deflecting any query remotely personal, but I was not so easily distracted.

"Harry," I said quietly. "Tell me."

He peeled the label off his bottle, shredding it onto the table before sighing and beginning to speak.

"It's just...that baby is so lucky. Its mother clearly loved it, and it has a whole community to care for it, should something happen to the mother. It's loved and it knows, and I... " H trailed off, looking up at last to meet my eyes. "I want that."

"You want to be a baby mermaid?"

"No, Draco, don't be absurd. I want a family. To love. To love me. A family that's mine." He looked back down at the table again, sifting through the shredded paper.

"But you...I don't understand," I said. "You're Harry Potter, surely you had family that loved you. I mean, I know your parents died when you were young, but...where did you grow up?"

He sighed deeply, smiling weakly at me before responding. "I was given to my aunt and her husband, my mother's sister. Muggles." He took another deep breath, as if bracing himself for what he was about to say. "They didn't like me. No, scratch that, they hated me. They despised me and everything about me, my parents, my hair, my needs...they hated that I had been forced on them. They hated magic. Not that I knew about magic until I was eleven. I got my Hogwarts letter and it all came as a huge surprise. See, they thought they could squash the magic out of me by keeping me alone, starved for food and affection and human contact. They kept me in the cupboard under the stairs, and basically ignored me. I was pretty much locked up all the time unless they needed me for something." He stopped, taking in a shuddering breath.

"For what?" I whispered, barely aware I had spoken.

"Chores, you know. I had to cook for them and clean up after them, and take care of the garden and...well, pretty much anything they could think of. Or just to yell at me and tell me how worthless I was, how unloved. Vernon, my uncle, he used to sit me down every night when I was young and rant for ages about how my parents didn't love me, how they died because of their own foolishness, how useless they had been. "Just a waste of space, that's all, and a blessing that they had themselves killed," he'd say.

"He told me they had died in a car crash, that they had been drinking. That my father was an unemployed alcoholic who had dragged my mother down into his squalor. I was sure to be just like them, a worthless leech, with nothing of use to offer society. Except perhaps to clean toilets or something equally demeaning."

"Harry, that's..." I interrupted, not even sure of what I wanted to say.

"I know, it's pretty horrible," he agreed.

"But, didn't they know who you were? What you'd done?" I asked.

"Oh, they knew. Dumbledore told them everything apparently, but it didn't matter. They hated magic and everything about it, especially me. I wonder if they would have been easier on me if I hadn't been touted as the 'Hero of the Wizarding World' or 'The Boy Who Lived'. Just knowing that I was magic, and powerful...I'm sure that made it worse. Made them more determined to squash the magic out of me.

"They let my cousin beat me up all the time, and he was huge. They encouraged him in it, I'm sure. As if neglecting me and spoiling him rotten while I watched wasn't enough. And when I did get my Hogwarts letter, they tried to keep it from me, tried to keep me from going. They hated me more than ever after that; they even locked me up during the summer after my first year."

"You had to go back every year?" I said, astonished. I had heard good and bad things about Albus Dumbledore, but he was without question a powerful wizard, both in magic and influence. Surely he didn't let Harry go back, knowing what he would be facing?

"Yeah," he said, resigned. "It was the magic, some kind of blood magic that my mother had conjured to protect me. It saved my life and ensured that no one could find me who meant to do me harm. And it made it impossible for Voldemort to touch me, which came in handy a few times. Unfortunately, that protection came with a price. I had to spend every summer there until I turned seventeen."

"Oh," I said, trying to absorb all he had told me. I didn't know if I could, it was so...shocking. It made sense though, in light of his detachment, his difficulty with opening up.

"Enough about me," he said with a wry grin. "Tell me about your childhood. I know your father, so I can imagine why your mother took you and ran, but..."

“Yeah, he's...not a very nice person,” I said.

“That's one way of putting it,” he said. I took a deep breath and told him. He'd opened up to me: the least I could do was return the favour.

“I don't really remember a lot. There are a few things that stand out, though. He almost killed one of our house elves for spilling his soup. He locked me in the dungeon once, when I was seven, because I tried to sneak into my mother's room...it was stormy and I was scared shitless. I don't suppose I have to tell you that I was never afraid of storms after that. What's a bit of rain and lightning when your father is a sadistic psychopath?”

“That's...not shocking, actually,” Harry said, smiling sadly at me. “Having had some experience with the man myself."

“Yeah, he's...well, there were a lot of little things. He was cold and distant...if he ever loved me I sure didn't know about it. I was his heir and that's all that mattered. Who I was, what I wanted, none of that mattered to him. Turns out it's a very good thing Mother took me and ran. I can't imagine he'd be proud of his gay son. He smacked me across the face when I was five for kissing my best friend on the cheek. It didn't mean anything: I'd kissed our other friend, who was a girl, a moment before. And they'd both kissed me. But when you're unhinged, everything is an offence.”

“Wow,” Harry said, his eyes wide.

“When Mother came and woke me up in the middle of the night and told me we were going on a trip, I knew. I knew we'd never be back, that we were running and if he caught us there would be no escape. I knew he'd kill her, purely for the insult of 'stealing' something that belonged to him. Because that's all I was to him: property. I wasn't Draco, I was the heir. Noting else mattered.” It was my turn to take a shuddering breath. My certainty of his hate and rage was one of the constants in my life, along with my mother's love. They're like night and day, my parents. My father is the terrifying darkness that you think you can never escape from, but my mother is the bright light of day, sweeping everything else away and making me feel safe. How I love her.

Silence fell for a moment while we both tried to soak in all the shocking information we had shared. I felt closer to him than ever. We were similar in a lot of ways, not least of which was our traumatic childhoods. I thought that perhaps we could help each other, to heal, to love. I sighed, looking up at him with a smile.

“I'm glad you'll never have to see them again,” I said.

“I'm glad you escaped,” he replied. "Hearing your story just makes me more determined."

"Determined to do what?" I ask. I'd forgotten during all the reminiscing just what we'd been talking about.

"Have a family," he replied, smiling absently, as if already dreaming of his perfect family.

"Oh?" I said. "How are you going to do that?"

"Oh, I'm sure I'll find the right person," he said, and I swear, the air left my chest. "I mean, the perfect girl is out there somewhere, right? I just have to find her."

"Yeah, I, uh..." I trailed off. What was I supposed to say to that? When just this morning I had been balls deep inside him while he writhed and moaned under me, I had hoped...well, I'd hoped that he was as invested as I was. That this thing between us, this undeniable, intense thing was actually going somewhere. Imagine my dismay to find out that it wasn't. What did it mean, then?

"It'll be great. I've only dreamed of that kind of stability. I mean, my best friend...his family kind of adopted me, and I love them, I'm so grateful for all they've done for me, but...well, I'm not really part of it, and it shows," he continued, oblivious to my emotional crisis. "I'd like to have a family, kids would be fab. I'm sure there's a pretty girl who wants the same, and will be able to stand me." He propped his hand on his palm, his intense eyes focusing on me once more.

"So, what about you?" he asked. "Do you want kids?"

"I...not really. It's not that I don't like them, in theory, but I've known since I was ten that I'm gay, so it's not like I can have them the old-fashioned way. It depends, I guess," I answered mechanically, tearing my eyes from his. I couldn't look at him anymore, not when my mind was in turmoil and my heart was in some kind of vise.

"Yeah, I can understand that," Harry said. He looked at me for a few minutes. I could feel his eyes on me though I couldn't open mine. I was still struggling with all he had told me, about his childhood, his family, about his plans for the future. The certainty that he'll be leaving me when his term is up...I took a deep breath, then jumped when I felt his hand on my cheek. I opened my eyes to find him crouching beside my chair, concern in his eyes.

"Draco, are you alright?" he asked.

"Yes, I..." I gathered my strength and mustered a smile. "I'll be fine. Bad memories, you know."

"Yeah, I do," he agreed, then took my hand and pulled me out of the chair. "Make love to me Draco," he asked, and I was powerless to deny him. My heart clenched at his words. How could he ask me to make love to him after telling me, in no uncertain terms, but without even knowing what he was doing, that I was nothing to him? Convenience. Circumstance. Proximity. Nothing he'd choose if given the choice. I swallowed the lump in my throat and set to making him feel every ounce of the love I felt for him. Even if he didn't see it for what it was, or love me back. We all have to do what we must.

123

"Draco, look at this," Harry said, calling me over. He had been slumped in his chair for an hour, flicking through websites and absentmindedly scratching his bare chest and belly occasionally. I was ostensibly focused on my own computer, but in reality, I was watching him. All that lovely skin on display, skin I have covered with my mouth and tongue just that morning. I sighed. I was becoming far too maudlin as our time here came closer to an end. There was still so much I wanted to do with him, so much potential. So much loss.

"Sure," I drawled, knowing it would get a grin out of him. I savoured his amused look and padded across the room to him.

"What is it?" I asked, glancing down at the screen.

"It's in Australia," he replied. "Lake Eyre. It's gorgeous, isn't it?"

"Yes," I agreed. It was. The lake was as still as glass, reflecting the clouds and landscape around it like a mirror.

"Usually it only gets a bit of water, from the rainfalls in the north, but sometimes it gets more and occasionally it fills completely," Harry explained, sifting through a few pictures, ranging from the dry lake bed to satellite images and back to the first image he'd shown me, the lake filled and vast.

"The water evaporates as the lake dries up, or so the Muggles think, but what they don't know is that there is an underground lake; a good portion of the water drains into it. In fact, the amount of the drainage is controlled magically, so it's really wizards who determine when the lake fills and how much. The lake never used to fill at all, until the wizards began 'plugging the hole' as it were." He grinned up at me, eyes bright and excited.

"Is there a wizard town down there, or something?" I asked. Why else would wizards care about how much water collects in the lake bed?

"Not as such," he replied, navigating away from the photo to a website. "There's a habitat like ours, only much larger. The underground lake is like the Black Lake at Hogwarts: it's filled with a lot of magical creatures that the people there study, including a rather large colony of merpeople. They're looking for more people for the upcoming year, so I'm going to apply."

My heart stopped, frozen in my chest. He hadn't spoken of his intention to leave since our discussion about our childhoods, so I'd pushed it to the side, ignored it.

"Oh?"

"Yeah, it's almost ready, see?" He closed the internet window, revealing an almost complete application for a term starting in five months’ time. Harry was grinning up at me, and if I wasn't so broken up by the thought of losing him, his enthusiasm would be contagious.

"But...are you sure you want to go there? Australia is a long way away, and the seasons are all backwards there. Plus, it's pretty hot, I've heard. You're not exactly acclimated to the weather." I didn't mean to bring him down, but I just couldn't bring myself to let him go without at least trying to convince him to stay. "Why not take another term here? I was considering taking another year myself."

"Nah, it's too isolated here," he replied, dismissing the idea with a wave of his hand. "There's a lot more people there, since it's not just a merperson colony being studied, and as for the weather, bring it on. I'm tired of rain and cold, and British Columbia was named well: it might as well be England. I need something new." He turned back to the application and began filling it out again.

"Okay," I said quietly, a lump in my throat. "It must be nice," I added, before I'd realized what I was saying.

"What?" he asked, not turning away from the screen and that damned application.

"Just picking up and leaving. Going wherever you want, with no thoughts to the people you're leaving behind." Okay, so I was getting a bit bitter.

"What are you talking about?" he asked, turning to look at me.

"Oh, you know. Just that you left your self-proclaimed family in England to come here, and now you're all set to move on and leave..." I trailed off. I wasn't going to say it. I was getting pretty girly as it is. I didn't want to suddenly sprout breasts or something. Ew.

"Leave you, you mean," he said quietly, staring at me with an inscrutable look on his face.

"I...no, of course not." I turned away, stalking back to my computer, and pretending to look busy.

"Draco," he said, but I ignored him. There was nothing left to say, really. "Draco," he said again, forcefully.

"What?" I snapped, giving him a glare.

"You know this isn't serious, right? I mean, this thing we're doing." He waved a hand between us, as if that could sum up everything we'd shared in the past eight months.

"Yes, you've made it very plain," I replied, closing up my laptop and gathering my things.

"Have I done anything to make you think it was more?" he asked, moving across the room to grab my arm.

"No, but you never did anything to make me think it wasn't," I said. "Or that it couldn't be. Anyway, it's not a problem. I'll be leaving shortly after you head off to your Australian adventure."

"I haven't even applied yet," he said. I tugged my arm free and turned to leave.

"Better get on it, then," I called over my shoulder. I headed straight for my room; the only thing to do after making a fool of yourself in front of the man you were in love with was to hide.

100

"Draco? Are you there?"

I jerked, waking up as if I'd been sleeping right there at the table. My head was fuzzy and my thoughts scattered. Well, not scattered so much as focused on one place, one person, far away from here.

"Sorry Mother," I said, my cheeks heating with embarrassment. I had been trying so hard all weekend to keep my head above water and, more importantly, keep my mother from guessing why I was struggling. I was depressed and I knew it. I was usually very good at keeping depression at bay or lifting myself from it once I'd realized where I was, but this was different. Now I was living with the cause of my depression, alone, contained, unable to escape it. Not that I would if I was able. I wanted to stay, I wanted to be with him. Yet I couldn't ignore the fact that Harry was leaving. That he'd never intended to stay and nothing that had grown between us would change his mind. Or his heart.

And that was the nail in the coffin, right there. I was hopelessly in love with him and he...well, I was just a convenience to him, wasn't I? Sure, he wanted me. He would never have let me shag him if he didn't and the sex was still fabulous. But there was a distance there that I hadn't felt before. Whether it was me or him who was maintaining it, I wasn't sure. Perhaps both of us. Because, no matter how intense the encounter, or how often we shagged, it was always in my head, the knowledge, the certainty that I'm not it. I'm not the one he wanted for the near future, never mind his life.

And I was certain, more every day, that he was the one for me. It was as undeniable as his imminent departure, and just as depressing. I sighed. There was no way out of this funk...not yet. Not until he was gone and I'd left the habitat and all its memories behind.

"Honestly, Draco," Mother chastised, and I realized that I'd drifted off again. "What on earth has got into you? I thought you'd be happy, what with your Harry waiting for you to come back."

"He's not my Harry, Mother. He never was. Besides, he's leaving once our term is up, and I'll probably never see him again." I took a long drink from my wine glass, partly to distract myself and partly to liquor up. Yes, getting wasted tonight was a great idea. Perhaps I'll hit the club after and find some pretty boy to shag...no, that'll never work. The thought of anyone but Harry twisted my stomach into knots. Besides, Mother and I were sharing a suite, as usual, and I didn't fancy a back alley fuck.

"I was under the impression that everything was going well," she said, brow furrowed. Unlike how Lucius would have reacted, Mother had never cared that I am gay: she just wanted me to be happy. Being gay didn't save me from her matchmaking attempts, but at least once I'd come out she stopped trying to hook me up with girls. Thank Merlin for that.

"So was I, for a while," I said, putting my glass down. Perhaps getting wasted wasn't the best of ideas. Tempting, though. "But I was deluding myself, apparently. He has every intention of moving to Australia and finding a pretty girl to marry and have kids with. The perfect family for the orphan boy. Never mind that he loves getting fucked until he can barely walk." Oops. Went a little over the line with that last, I think. Perhaps I should lay off the wine.

"Draco!" she exclaimed, her cheeks flaring. "Have some decency, please."

"Yes, Mother," I said respectfully. "Sorry."

"Honestly," she said, fanning herself. "You know I don't have any problems with your preferences, but I do not wish to hear any sordid details about your sex life."

"I apologize," I said.

"Well, alright, then," she said, fixing me with a look that I knew far too well. "But at least now I know what has been bothering you all weekend."

"Is it that obvious?" I asked, cringing.

"To me it is, but I am your mother, after all. I know you better than anyone, Draco," she stated, and I knew she was right. I was a mummy's boy and I knew it. "You're really feeling this. Are you that in love with this boy?"

"He's not a boy, Mother. He killed You Know Who, remember?" I corrected. I could never think of Harry as anything but all man, though I knew he still had some filling out to do.

"Of course he is. I haven't forgotten," she said, patting my hand. The waitress came over just then, so we ordered some dessert: triple chocolate torte for me. there was nothing better for this mood than chocolate. For a moment I thought that I could distract Mother from our topic, but one look at her face told me that was a false hope. Once the waitress had left she raised her eyebrow and waited. I sighed, knowing there was nothing for it.

"I...I don't know. How do you know real love from infatuation?" I asked.

"You know," she replied. "When you are infatuated, you think that nothing will ever change, how you feel, the intensity, this is it, forever, and you have no doubts. It's how I felt about your father, in the beginning." She sighed, her face full of regret. "But love," she continued, "love fills you with doubts, with uncertainties. Love changes, and it changes you. It grows as you do."

"Oh," I said quietly. "Have you ever been in love?" It occurred to me that she was very certain. But, as far as I knew, she'd never been with anyone since we fled England.

"Yes," she answered softly. "A lovely young man, when you were ten. You've never met him: he is the cousin of one of my friends. You were in the midst of some personal angst then, and probably would not have noticed if I had snogged him in the sitting room. Not that it ever progressed that far. I could not allow it; you were my world, and it was far too early to think about a new relationship."

"What happened?" I asked.

"He couldn't wait," she said simply. "I don't blame him, though at the time I thought I would hate him forever for giving up on me. I did, though. Of course he couldn't wait: it was unfair of me to ask him to."

"Do you still love him?"

"Yes, I do. I always will. I have yet to find anyone else able to get so close into my heart. I may never," she said wistfully.

"I'm sorry," I said, taking her hand and giving it a squeeze.

"It's fine: I have learned to live with it." She gave me a smile, and squeezed back. The waitress brought our desserts, thankfully, and I dug into my torte with determination. It was so good, I had to stop and moan.

"Well, I'll remember to order that next time," Mother said, smirking.

"It's fabulous!" I smiled back.

"So Draco, you were telling me about your feelings; do go on." Darn, another bullet going undodged.

I took a deep breath, focusing on a spot just over her shoulder. Fortunately, she had her back to the window, so I wasn't left staring at the wall.

"I think...no. I know. He's it, Mum, he's the one. I hate him and he annoys me and disgusts me and oh, he is so infuriating, but I just...I can't let it go. I want to keep him, forever. There's so much about him I don't know, so much to learn. We get on well, and we argue ferociously and the sex...oh, don't give me that look," I said in response to her scrunched nose. "I'm not going into details, but it's amazing. Enlightening, uplifting, transcendent."

"Well, that really is special then," she cut in.

"It is. There's nothing like it. And I know he's far from perfect, and he's really rather closed off, but I want to open him up. I want to know all there is." I put my fork down and looked her in the eye.

"It's too soon. Too soon, I haven't had him long enough. I just know he could love me, if he tried. If he actually let himself, instead of running off to find some random girl to be a breed mare for him."

"Draco! That's unkind," Mother said and I knew she was right. But...

"I don't care," I snapped back. "He wants some dream of the perfect wife and the perfect family, the perfect life! But life isn't perfect and no makeshift family will ever replace his dead parents, or bring them back. Nothing will erase his childhood; trying to resurrect the past is no way to plan for the future. And I'm right here, Mother, I'm right here, and I love him so much it's killing me. I just can't let him walk out of my life, but he's determined to do it! What can I do?" I asked, more than a little desperately. My eyes were itching with unshed tears, but I would not let them out here, not in public.

"Oh, my boy," she said, taking both my hands and looking me right in the eye. "You will get through this. You will watch him walk out of your life, and it will break your heart into endless pieces, but you will find a way to pick them up again. You are my son and you are strong. You will survive and you will love again, do you hear me?"

I nodded, blinking back the ever-threatening tears, clinging to her hands as if I would fall into the abyss should I dare to let go. I didn't believe her, of course, but I had to try. There was no hope for me if I couldn't.

68

It's eerily quiet in the dome when you're there alone. The presence of another person fills the space with sounds and life, but alone...it's silent. The noises that the various machines and spells make are like background noise: they aren't company. Harry was outside; sometimes he liked to take a swim, without having to worry about work, and I didn't blame him. It was easy to go stir crazy in this place. I was used to it after almost two years, but he definitely wasn't. The sex helped a lot, for both of us...I was much less restless this term than I had been during the one I spent with Melisa.

There had been a week of awkward exchanges after our...argument, I guess you could call it, but we hadn't been able to stay apart for long. There were reasons that two people were assigned to this outpost, and why our leaves were so short, only three days at a time. Many of our underwater tasks required a partner, and the forced closeness wouldn't allow the awkwardness to linger. As much as it still hurt, his easy dismissal of what had been growing between us, his eagerness to leave me behind, I pushed it down and tried to act normal. Our friendship hadn't been damaged too badly, and it didn't take that long to get back into bed, but I could feel the distance now, where before there had been none. Or so I'd thought.

I suppose that's what it all comes down to. Perspective. I was falling ever more in love with him, and he was just letting off some steam. It was hard to reconcile, but I was trying. I was trying to enjoy the last few weeks we had together and...

"Hello Draco," a voice interrupted, raising the hairs on the back of my neck. No. Impossible. I didn't turn around, I just closed my eyes and wished it away, as if my denial would make it any less real. Until I was struck across the back of the head and knocked to the floor. I turned and looked up and all my fears came to life when I saw my father before me, looking exactly as he had the last time I'd seen him. The day before we had fled for our lives.

"Look at me when I am speaking to you, boy," Lucius hissed, his eyes blazing with madness and anger.

"W-what," I stuttered, too in shock to move. "What are you doing here?"

"Oh, perfect," he sneered. "An accent to go with your new country, and the new name. Or should I say, the old name with a twist. Very clever, it made finding you rather difficult. But it's just a fancy way of saying Black. Don't you know that the Blacks are gone, Draco? That they died from madness and inbreeding, such a pathetic family. No son of mine will carry that name, no more."

"It's a damn sight better than Malfoy!" I snapped back, earning a kick in the ribs for it. I doubled over, but he kept talking.

"Bite your tongue boy, or I will rip it out of your damn traitorous head!" he shouted. "Although I can't blame you, really, you were just a child, under the influence of your mother, the ungrateful bitch! After all I'd given her, lifting her out of that disaster of a family and giving her my name, as if she deserved it. But she proved what she was in the end, just another unfaithful Black without the courage to see her commitments though."

He reached down and grabbed my arm, pulling me into a standing position, his mood suddenly shifting. "Now let me look at you, all grown up. Such a fine looking young man you are, Draco, the perfect heir for my house. Once I've trained your mother's brainwashing out of you, that is."

"Leave her out of this," I spat in his face. Probably not the best move, but I didn't care. "She saved me, she saved us both. If we'd stayed you'd have killed us before long."

"Shut up!" he roared, shaking me and throwing me to the ground again. "You know nothing of me, nothing!"

"I know that you're a psychotic madman, driven only by lust for money and power, as pathetic as your so-called 'master'. But wait, he's dead now, isn't he? You're a cowardly follower and now there's no one left to follow, is there?" Oh Merlin, what was I doing? I don't know where the words came from, but I couldn't stop them. Things I'd wanted to say to him for a long time. All it was doing was making him angrier and with my wand on the table behind him and Harry out for who knows how long, the situation was getting desperate. My head spun with the implications, if he captured me now, he'd make certain I never had a chance to flee again.

"Cruicio!" he screamed and white hot pain exploded in every part of my body as the curse took hold. It didn't last long, but long enough. I was left panting on the floor, weakened and terrified.

"Did that feel good, boy? Did you like it? If you want more, simply loosen that traitorous tongue of yours again and I'll see it lasts for much longer." He gave me another kick, spitting on my face before turning and seating himself in the chair I had been in before he'd knocked me out of it.

"Why are you here?" I gasped out, clutching my middle and desperately trying to breathe as the aftershocks of pain rippled through me.

"Why, I'm here to take you home, of course," he said, his voice soft and loving now. "You were stolen from me, most unexpectedly, and I found that I could not blame you for it. You were forced to leave me, kidnapped by that bitch I married, and hidden from me. But I found you and I'll bring you home, where you belong. As far from this backward colony as I can take you."

"I belong here," I said, sitting up with aching muscles.

"No!" he roared, his eyes blazing with madness once more. The mood swings were unpredictable. The only way I could see out of this was to play along. I swallowed and prepared to submit, or make him think I was.

"But Mother," I said weakly.

"Oh, I'll get my revenge on your mother, never fear. But I thought it prudent to secure you first. When one has proven to be such a deceptive bitch, you can't be too careful. Wouldn't do to have her warn you, would it?" He looked down at me disdainfully, lifting his nose.

"Do get up off the floor, Draco," he said. "Never forget you are a Malfoy, and Malfoys do not sit upon the floor."

"Yes, Father," I said in an attempt to mollify him. I dragged my aching body up and managed to get onto the chair across from him. We sat in silence, I had no idea what he was thinking, and I was not about to hazard a guess. My mind was awhirl with possibilities, how I was going to stop him, how to get my wand back (that would help with stopping him) and what if Harry came back at the wrong moment. Oh, if only Harry would show up now, wand drawn while Lucius' back was to him.

Unfortunately, it wasn't to be. Lucius stood and began pacing around the room, keeping an eye fixed on me while he shuffled papers and knocked over equipment.

"So, Draco, let's get to know each other while we wait for the Portkey," he said casually. "I assume you were given some kind of magical education? Or did your mother send you to some Muggle school?" The derision was plain, for both Mother and Muggles.

"No sir," I replied. "She sent me to the Vancouver Island School of Magic...it's very prestigious, the best magical school in the area." It was the best. NBCMA was the only other school for BC and Alberta, and it wasn't nearly as good.

"I'm glad to hear it. A Malfoy deserves nothing but the best." He continued his lap around the room. As he reached the far side of the room, I realized my chance had come. He was too far from me to stop me in time, his back turned, and my wand only a few feet away. I kept my eye on him and when he turned to look at the large map of the sea floor, I leapt from the chair and dashed to my wand, snatching it up and dropping to the floor, just in time for a red bolt to hit the desk where it lay.

"Draco!" he bellowed. "Get up and give me your wand, you foolish boy!" I slipped around the edge of the desk, resting against it for a moment. I could see him stalking across the room: his reflection in the glass viewing window was bearing down on me.

"Never!" I yelled back, leaping to my feet and casting at him as soon as I cleared the table top. "Incarcerous!"

"Protego!" he deflected my spell with ease and kept advancing. "You'll pay for that, boy!"

"Stop calling me boy!" I snapped, casting a few quick spells in an attempt to cut through his shielding, but he was too fast. I ducked behind another chair, forced further into the room by his hexes.

"Stand up and fight like a real man. Or did your mother raise you as Muggle?" he sneered, but I ignored him and kept moving. I had no idea where I was going, I just needed to put some distance between us. My mind began searching for a spell to use against him, but the real problem was getting past his shields.

"Fuck off!" I said instead, diving across the floor so that I was behind the console and adjacent to the doorway, where he now stood in all his insane glory. I had to admit, he made a striking picture, all dark robes and white hair. The nobility of his ancestry was plain on his face, but the madness underneath twisted his handsome features until they were almost unrecognizable. I shot off a few more spells, but they, too, were deflected. Damn, he wasn't going to make this easy.

"Fool," he laughed, lifting his hands as if accepting worship. "You are nothing but an insignificant child next to me, boy. Either your school is not as proficient as you believe it is, or you take after your mother in more than your pretty face. Give in and we will return home to begin your re-education."

"I'm not going anywhere with you, you freak!" I yelled back sending a few more spells his way. He had stopped casting spells and was simply deflecting mine now, biding his time. I shuddered, fear and panic beginning to overwhelm me. I was running out of ideas and there was no sign of Harry. Perhaps it was better that he not come back, my father would surely kill him if he had the chance. I'd rather go with him than see Harry dead, if that's what it came to.

"You'll never break through my shields, boy," he taunted. "I was trained by the greatest dark wizard to have ever walked this earth, how could a child like you hope to compete?"

"Some great wizard," I said with a sneer, pushing myself up and standing to face him. The thought of him hurting Harry had changed my agenda, I just had to get him out of this place and then I could come up with a method of escape. "Killed by an infant, and then a teenager?"

"You know nothing about it!" he snarled, raising his wand. "It's time to end this, Imperi..."

He never got to finish the incantation as a body hurtled itself through the air toward him, knocking him onto the floor.

"Harry!" I yelled, dashing across the room to where he and Lucius were caught in a wrestling match, Lucius' wand on the floor beside him. Suddenly Harry yelped and doubled over, falling to the side and allowing Lucius to snatch up his wand.

"Stay back, or I'll Crucio him," he warned, and I stopped, unable to bear the thought that Harry would have to go through the pain I had recently experienced. "Well, well, if it isn't Harry Potter." He sneered and kicked Harry in the ribs causing him to shout in pain once more. "I might have known you'd be here, for who else has plagued me since the day of his birth? So damned lucky, that's all, but your luck is about to run out, you filthy Mudblood!" He raised his wand.

"Father, please!" I shouted, coming to stand beside him. "Please, don't hurt him," I begged, unable to stop myself, still hoping for a way out.

"Draco, don't," Harry gasped.

"Quiet, Harry," I said, giving him a pleading look before turning to Lucius, a bargain on my lips.

"Yes, shut up, Potter," he spat, kicking Harry again.

"Father, please, I-I'll come with you, just please leave Harry alone."

"I'm sorry son, but I can't do that," he replied. "This whelp has ruined my plans too many times, and I cannot allow him to ruin this one." He raised his wand again, a gleam in his eye that made me shudder. "Avada Kedav..."

"Cruicio!" I screamed, channelling all my hate and fear and desperation into the spell. He collapsed to the floor, screaming in agony as I pulled Harry away. He stood, gripping my arm and shaking it.

"Stop it now, Draco," he said, but I couldn't. The man at my feet had tortured me and Mother for too long, had hurt and killed so many people, including Harry and his friends, as well as countless others, Muggle and Magical alike. He deserved it.

"No, he doesn't," Harry said. Apparently, I had said it out loud. "He deserves to rot in prison, but no one deserves this, Draco. Please."

I sighed, ending the spell and slumping against Harry in exhaustion.

"Stupefy; Incarcerous," he cast quickly, binding Lucius and taking me in his arms. "Shh, it's okay now, Draco. He'll go back to prison; he'll never be able to do this again."

All of the fear and tension and relief came pouring out of me in a rush, leaving me a sobbing mess in Harry's arms. The rest of the world was forgotten as he held me. I felt loved, protected, at peace, and I never wanted to leave. I felt more strongly than ever, that with Harry is where I belong.

22

The feeling didn't last long. Reality has a way of biting you in the ass. And not in the good way. It was scarcely a month later that Harry received his acceptance for the Lake Eyre Magical Creatures Association. He was over the moon. I, as you may have guessed, was not.

"Here's the pamphlet, check out those facilities. They have three separate domes in the underground lake, connected by a Floo system. Well, it's like a Floo system, from what I can tell. More like a tube that sucks you magically to the dome. And the living area is separate from the observation posts, which houses people from all three areas. Look at that common area: it's huge, nothing like this little place."

I nodded along, trying to get into his enthusiasm, but I just couldn't. "This place isn't so bad, is it?" I asked, absently flipping through the pamphlet he'd given me.

He looked up and laughed. "Oh, come on Draco. You've been here almost two years, you must know by now that this place is a dive. It needs an update badly, the equipment is getting a little ancient, and it's so crowded down here. There's no way more than two people could live here."

"This place was built for two people," I said, feeling more than a little defensive.

"Sure, sure, but you have to admit it could use improvements," he insisted, eyes alight with the joy of his newer, bigger, fancier home. I swallowed a lump of hurt, something I'd been doing more and more as his departure approached.

"Seems like you're moving on to better things. Better facilities, better pay. Better friends, better lovers." So I was a bit bitter, so what? The man I loved more than I thought possible was leaving me without a second thought. What's not to be bitter about?

"Oh, Draco," Harry replied, clapping me on the shoulder. "You know the only thing that made this place bearable was you." He leaned over and gave me a soft kiss, then patted my cheek and turned back to his pamphlets. "But this place, this is fabulous. I can't wait to get there."

"When do you start?" I asked softly, gazing at him, trying to capture every nuance and memorize it.

"Two months from now," he replied, grinning. "But I'm going to book the first flight I can after I get out of here. I can spend some time as a tourist; Australia is a beautiful country."

"I'm sure it is," I agreed. "Canada is pretty beautiful too," I added.

"Yes, but too cold," he laughed. I smiled back, but my heart wasn't in it. My heart wasn't in anything lately. Whenever it felt like breaking I tried to remember what my mother had told me, tried to be strong, but it was a struggle. Like I was in the water and it was lapping at my face, and there was no special charm to save me. I was in over my head and it was beginning to take its toll.

1

This is it. The last time. I tried not to focus on that as I kissed him and pushed him back onto my bed, pulling off my clothes as he scrambled out of his. I tried not to think about his room, bare of all personal effects, his bag packed and waiting on the bed. He was as beautiful as ever, as passionate, as wild. Letting him go is going to rip me to pieces.

I crawled onto the bed, running my hands over every inch of him, kissing him desperately as I tried to soak up how it felt when he touched me. His hands gripped my arms, my shoulders, travelled up and down my chest before reaching back to grab my ass and pull me closer as he thrust his hips up to meet me. Our erections brushed and slid, rubbing against each other as I settled onto him, grinding.

"Mmm, Draco," he panted, wrapping his legs around my waist to keep us close.

"Yeah, I know," I said, kissing him again. I wanted to inhale him, make him mine so he'd never be able to leave.

"Gah," he exclaimed, pushing me away. "I need you in me, come on."

"What's the rush?" I said, as I pinned his hands to the bed and kissing my way down his throat, leaving hickeys as I went. I wanted to mark him as mine, permanently, but I knew that wasn't possible. This would have to do. I ran my tongue back and forth across his collarbone, paying attention to the spots that I knew affected him more, sucking blood to the skin with a vehemence that surprised even me.

I moved down, marking his chest and belly, loving how he quivered as I reached the ticklish spot just about his left hip, which I laved slowly, driving him into incoherence.

"Nguh," he said, moaning my name and cursing me at the same time, unable to string more than a few words together. Oh Harry, how could you think about giving this up? Has anyone ever made you feel like this, has anyone made you insensible with lust and need, has anyone else made you come so hard you blacked out? Do I matter to you at all?

How could he leave me like this? Just walk away without a backward glance, when I loved him so well, how could he just throw it all away? I felt tears pricking my eyes and I blinked them back, turning my attention to his straining cock, sucking it in as far as I could before lavishing all the love I felt for him onto it.

"Draco, please, I'm, I'm," he gasped out, but I already knew. I knew before he did, the clenching of his thighs, the increased pitch of his cries warning me before the head of his cock mushroomed between my lips and he came, spurt after spurt of his essence on my tongue and lips. I sucked and swallowed, lapping it up as if it were the elixir of life which, to me, it was.

"Oh, oh, oh," he said, his hands clenched in my hair as he came down, but I wasn't done yet. Not nearly. I rolled him over and spread his legs, pulling his cheeks apart and blowing gently on his twitching pucker before leaning in to kiss it. I made love to his hole as I had his cock, and soon he was wriggling under me once more, gasping and moaning and squirming, pushing his ass back for more. He loved it when I ate him out, it never failed to harden him again, no matter how hard I'd made him come before, and this was no exception. He pushed up onto his knees, lifting his ass and waving it in the air for me, leaving no doubts as to what he wanted.

But I didn't want to do it like that, not this time. I rolled him over onto his back, spelling lube onto my cock before leaning in for another kiss. I pulled his legs up and exposed his hungry hole to my cock. It was starving for him, it always was. I plunged in, wasting no time now that he was ready and hard once more. I didn't move fast though, I wanted to take my time and savour every sound, every twitch I could wring from him. I set a steady pace, making sure to hit his prostate; I wanted him to come with me, together, the way it should be.

Long minutes passed in a flash as I thrust into him relentlessly, never speeding up, never changing the angle, just enough to keep him, and me, on the edge, clinging to each other for life. Finally I reached the point where I could not stand it anymore, my thrusts began to pick up speed and I pushed his legs back further so that I was hitting his sweet spot on every pass. His moaning grew louder and louder as I sped up, compounded when I reached down and took his cock in hand, stroking in time with my thrusts until both of us were flung over the edge into bliss, panting and moaning and gasping for air.

I let his legs fall and my cock slide out of him as I rolled to the side, pulling him with me and kissing him with all the longing and love that I possessed. It was almost over and I couldn't bear the thought. Now was not the time to dwell on fact, now was the time to imagine what might have been, as I held him in my arms for the last time, both of us drifting to sleep, sticky and sated, complete.

0

He was ready. Ready and eager and completely oblivious to what I was feeling. Which was for the best really, if being with me for almost a year wasn't enough to make him want to stay, nothing I said today would be.

We were in the reception room, minutes away from the activation of his Portkey, watching each other awkwardly and filling the silence with coughs and shuffling feet.

"So, you're off in a few days, then?" he asked.

"The replacements arrive the day after tomorrow," I said, probably sounding depressed and dispirited. It wasn't a stretch: I was depressed and dispirited.

"Have you decided what you're gonna do?"

"No, I'm not sure," I replied. "It's not like I need the money, so..." I trailed off.

"Just a few minutes now," he said, checking his watch for the twentieth time.

"Yeah, I..." I met his eyes for probably the first time that day, searching his face for something, anything.

"I guess this is goodbye," he said, giving me a small smile. "It's been...pretty amazing, actually."

I nodded, still holding his gaze, until he broke it to heft the Portkey.

"Harry," I croaked. He looked at me, his hair falling over intense eyes, more attractively than ever before. Or was it just the desperation of the situation? "Don't go," I pleaded quietly.

He looked right into me, his eyes filled with regret, and for a split second I thought he would change his mind and stay. Instead, he took two steps toward me, clasping the back of my neck and kissing me deeply and tenderly before pulling back and whispering, "Bye."

He backed up again, not a moment too soon, disappearing almost immediately, a soft smile on his lips and anticipation in his eyes.

I could taste him on my lips for hours after he had gone, until the salt of lonely tears washed him away.

-3

"Draco!" Mother exclaimed as I came through the door, dashing across the room and all but throwing herself at me. It was more than a little out of character, but understandable given the circumstances.

"Mother, honestly," I laughed when she pulled back, finally. "Have a little decorum," I said, imitating her British drawl.

She laughed unrestrainedly, a sound I didn't hear often, but one that I loved.

"I was so worried for you," she said seriously, pulling me into the sitting room.

"I know you were," I replied, squeezing her hand and smiling warmly at her. "The experience was...rather harrowing, but once it was over...I was alright. Harry was there," I added. I had sent her a message after Lucius had been toted away and the mess had been cleared. She deserved to know, after all, they were still officially married. Not for long, now that the danger of his discovering us had passed. It turned out that a condition of Lucius' parole was that he not leave the UK, so not only was he facing charges in Canada, charges I was more than happy to press, but he was facing extradition to England, and an extended sentence there. It was nothing less than he deserved.

"About that," Mother said, smiling sadly at me. "He's gone, is he?" I nodded, swallowing down the grief that had threatened to overwhelm me at various times over the last few days. She pulled me into another hug, a gentler one this time, and I went, gratefully, breathing in the comforting smell of home. For a few moments I was a child again and being held in my mother's arms made everything alright. She was my hero, after all.

But nothing could change the fact that Harry was gone. My heart ached for what could have been, like a pressure on my chest that made it tight and itchy, my eyes prickling with unshed tears. I took a deep shuddering breath and held on, determined that this heartache would not break me. Mother was right, I am stronger than that.

It still hurt like a bitch, though.

Finally she pulled back, cupping my face and kissing me softly on the forehead. "You are a strong, resilient man, Draco. You have survived your father, not once, but twice. Harry may hold your heart, but your will is your own."

I smiled sadly and nodded. She was right of course, as always.

"It's time to put them both in the past. We start fresh from here, yes?"

"Yes," I agreed, pulling her close again and squeezing tight. "We start from here."

~*~

"And that was two years ago," Draco said, wrapping up his story, sighing in relief that it was over. "I never saw Harry after that day, and though I swore to move on, it wasn't as easy as all that."

"So that's why you don't date, still?" Phil asked, leaning in eagerly. "That's crazy; you need to get over the jerk."

"Hey, he's not a jerk," Draco defended, shaking his head at his friend. "He just wanted different things; I can't begrudge him following his heart. The problem is, mine just isn't into dating anymore."

"It's understandable," Shelley piped up. "A love like that doesn't come along every day. And Harry Potter, no less. No wonder you can't get over him."

"Well, there is that," Phil agreed. "Is he as gorgeous as the pictures?"

"He's scruffy and unkempt and utterly hopeless," Draco said with a laugh. "But yes, totally gorgeous."

"Wow," his friends said, awe all over their faces.

"At least you got to fuck him for the better part of a year," Jack said with smirk that he'd patterned after Draco's own. "That's gotta be worth something."

"Oh, you: always thinking with your cock!" Shelley exclaimed, hitting Jack on the chest.

"Hey, I'm here, queer, and horny as fuck!" Jack said, tossing his chin flamboyantly. "Besides, you've got to see the bright side. Draco got to top the so-called 'Greatest Wizard of our Age,' repeatedly. It's something to write home about."

"If only I hadn't lost my heart in the process," Draco said, shaking his head at his friend. "But you are right about one thing: I wouldn't trade that year in for anything, despite the heartache."

"I still say you should get over him," Phil said. "And that Mark bloke is just the guy to do it with, and you can't deny he's hot as hell."

A chorus of confirmation went up from the others. "He's got you there, Draco," Shelley said. "I'd do him," she said with a leer.

"You'd have to do him," Jack said with a laugh. "He's a total bottom; I bet he'd bend over if you had a nice big strap-on to offer him."

They laughed uproariously, even Draco couldn't help himself. His friends were right, it was time to pick up the pieces and live again. The doorbell rang, cutting through the merriment.

"That'll be Alan and Jess," Draco said. "Damn newlyweds, always late."

"I'll get it!" Shelley volunteered, jumping up and leaving the room.

"Grab me another one of those divine coolers, would you?" Phil called out as she went.

"Get it yourself," she called over her shoulder, making Draco and Jack laugh at Phil's pout.

"I bet they're late because they stopped for a quickie," Phil speculated. "They can't keep their hands off each other, it's disgusting," he said with a grimace.

"I know," Draco agreed, scrunching up his nose. "All that happy heterosexuality really turns me off!" He shared a laugh with Jack and Phil, but they were cut off when Shelley came back into the room, a rumpled, travel worn figure following.

"Draco, it's for you," Shelley said, her voice hushed. Draco looked up, the laugh dying in his throat as he recognized the unexpected visitor.

A nervous Harry stood before him, several bags over his shoulders, hair and clothes messier than Draco had ever seen them.

"Harry," he breathed, frozen in shock.

"Hello Draco," Harry said softly. "I hope I'm not intruding. I just came to talk a bit, if you can spare a moment."

"Ooh, that accent," Jack said, looking Harry up and down. "Just lovely."

Harry shot him a shy glance, but his eyes where quickly back on Draco, who had stood.

"I, yeah, of course," he stuttered, gesturing toward the balcony.

Harry pulled his bags off and stacked them against the wall, nodding at the rest as he followed Draco out the doors onto the balcony. Draco pulled the door shut, glaring at his friends in warning before turning to the man he thought he'd never see again. His heart clenched as joy and hope twisted him up inside.

"It's rather a surprise to see you," Draco began, fidgeting with the door handle. "I'd heard you were happily settled with some pretty Australian girl," he added, swallowing down the hurt.

"Alicia," Harry said, shaking his head. "Yes, we...well, we were engaged for a while, but I came to realize that, as inconvenient as it can be, you can only deny your heart for so long."

"Oh?" Draco breathed, panic joining the myriad of emotions inside him.

"Yeah," Harry said. "I still want a family, desperately, but I just couldn't deny anymore that I missed you. That I thought about you more than I thought about her, even with her right in front of me. That no one has ever made me feel the way you do, and I wasn't being fair to Alicia by staying. She's a lovely girl, and she deserves better. So I broke it off."

"You, I..." Draco swallowed heavily, his heart swelling as he struggled to absorb all that Harry had said. "I don't understand."

"I came back for you, Draco," Harry clarified, taking a step closer and prying Draco's hand from the door handle. "That is, if you're not seeing anyone. And if you're still interested. It's been years, I know, I'm sorry..."

"Why now?" Draco interrupted, yanking his hand back.

"I...I needed some time," Harry replied. "It took a little longer than it should have, I reckon."

"Oh, you think?" Draco snapped back. "Two years, Harry, it's been two years! I could be married by now!"

"You can do that here?" Harry asked, but Draco just glared at him. "Sorry, that's not the point." Harry took a breath, leaning on the rail and looking out over the inlet. "Thing is, after the war, I didn't really know what I wanted, or who I was. I fell in love with aquatic research, that part came quickly, but... Who I am...it was harder to find."

"Clearly," Draco said, shaking his head. "You could have found yourself here, you know."

"No, I don't think I could have. I needed to get some distance to see what I'd lost. To realize what I missed, what I wanted."

"And you've decided it's me?" Draco asked.

"Yes," Harry said, turning towards him again.

"Convenient," Draco said, turning away. "But how do I know you won't fuck off to 'find yourself' again? I asked you to stay, before..."

"I know you did. I'm sorry I couldn't stay then. I know you loved me....and truthfully, I had strong feelings for you, but I didn't know how strong, or how real," Harry said. "We were stuck in a bubble, Draco."

"We're not anymore," Draco said, his ire cooling.

"I know," Harry replied. "It's real life out here, and I'd like to spend it with you, if you like."

Suddenly Harry found himself with an armful of teary Draco, clinging to him as if he would disappear again should his grip slacken. "There's no one but you, there hasn't been...I..." He trailed off, struck dumb by the suddenness, the unlikeliness of the offer before him. He pulled back, resting his forehead against Harry's, breathing in the spicy, masculine scent he never thought he'd smell again.

"Do you really mean it? Are you going to stay?" Draco asked quietly, lifting his head to meet Harry's eyes, still as green and intense as the day he had left. "Don't break my heart again, Harry; I couldn't bear it."

"I'm here to stay, Draco, if you'll have me," Harry said with a smile. "Shitty weather or not." Draco laughed, his smile so wide it was almost painful.

"I love you, Draco Noirci," Harry said seriously, looking deep into Draco's eyes. "I've missed you terribly, and I'd fancy a kiss, if you're willing," he added.

"I love you, too," Draco replied, beaming at him and wrapping his arms around Harry's neck, letting one hand wander into insanely messy hair while the other clung to one strong shoulder. He captured Harry's mouth in a deep, passionate kiss, letting loose two years of aching want in one go.

~*~