wow...
So, things have changed a little bit huh? Lets see, life just kinda did a 180 with me man...I miss the friends that I used to have. The whole basketball team hates me now and I dont blame them one bit to tell you the truth... I stranded my teammates in the middle of the season...6 people on the team now, every game they played they have lost, and I feel like Im so much to blame. Not that we didnt lose when I was on the team or anything, but its not like me being on the team was bad. Fuck man, and everyday I do the same thing, I go to Allie's dads and then sometimes so Seans, and then trent comes, we get weed and roll blunts, and then smoke all night until I have to go home. I love it, I would much rather smoke weed everyday then go home everyday and snort a line, or cash a fat bowl of ice, or fucking pop a pill every time I get 25 dollars in my hand. I love Allie, and Trent, and stupid Shannie, and Chris, and Sean and all of them, I love the friends Im with all the time, but I gave up my dream that I had had since I was about 7 years old. There was nothing that could ever stop me from playing basketball and making good grades all of my life...until the end of last year. DRUGS!! When I stop drugs though I still dont wanna do it though cause my brain has already been so fucked up from the drugs that I did do, that I give up on basketball, and i start to fail classes, and I get into all kinds of trouble (TICKETS SON OF A BITCH!) and its because I honestly dont give a shit anymore. I do not care one bit about anything besides the people I am with everyday and the people that have ment something to me and been there for me of course. I have gone from being someone that is so much more than what I am today, to well...what I am today. BUT IM PROUD OF WHO I AM TODAY!! SHIT! Is that a bad thing? that Im proud to be as well, fucked up as I am today? Man see I just dont know anymore. See this probably doesnt make any fucking sense at all, and its cause Im kinda high, but thats the way I think and so if its wrong then fuck it. grrr.... Someone please just tell me what to do.
OH YEAH!!! and I got to fucking huge pimples on my forehead, Erin hates me,