Back again...
Well. Back in the land of Nottingham.
Yesterday was truly bizarre and I'm not sure I enjoyed it at all. I was in two minds about coming back - don't get me wrong, I looove Notts to bits, but I love home too and......home doesn't have the promise of a shitty course for another six months. But yes. I'm back, and its just been a little weird.
Firstly, my mum's auntie died yesterday morning so that completely threw everything - I was fairly close to her, but my mum's really upset which resulted in me not really wanting them to leave....and constant phone calls from my mum when she got home. I said I'd try and get back for the funeral, exams permitting, but we'll see.
Then it's just been weird, being back. I've got my room looking all homey again and everything, but it's like our group has completely changed. I swore I wouldn't miss Wesley because that'd just add fire to the rumours that are flying around at home whenever I mention him as well as here (because Sophie and Jo know what almost happened between us). But then last night, Sophie and Richard closed themselves in her room....and five minutes later Tom and Jo closed themselves in her room, and I was left on my lonesome for about half an hour. Admittedly I wasn't in theee most sociable of moods last night, but still. That was the time me and Wesley would've just sat around with my door closed deliberately, taking the piss out of the others. But without him, I just kinda felt like a third wheel.
Anyway. Think I'm over it now, but we'll see.
The big slog of revision starts today, and I'm petrified (hence this entry while I avoid getting dressed). I know I only really need 40pc, but I'm worried about how I'm even gunna manage to get that, to be honest. I hate the course so much that I've got no motivation but then I'm petrified that the English Dept are going to turn around and tell me to sod off, that they don't want me to change.
Meh.
Apologies for the depressingness. It'll be a phase, I'll be over it soon.