(no subject)
i just realized how much im like my dad... and i dont know if that is a good thing or a bad thing.... the temper part is bad, im becoming like my dad more and more in that way... i think that one is kinda bad, cuz i just flip out. Like today.... WOW.... ok.... so me and alisha were set to sell yearbooks while Will went to get that one AD... then picked us up for lunch! OK?... so me and alisha were walking up to Wills are, and then he started to come down the hill twords us, then some car pulled infront of him to the other side of the street where you cant park, it was that one-way over by 50th street where people park. THEN so the car does that dumb shit and im just like "Fucking dumbass car!" then will stops, pulls over a little so we can get into the car, i walk up to the car and the dumb bitch starts to back up!!! IM OPENING THE FUCKING DOOR AND SHE IS STILL BACKING UP!!!!!!!!! So i start to yell again and then she finally stops and then Will gets out of the car and she gets out and i start to blow up again so i just stay sitting in the car and then alisha has to tell me to calm down and everything and just before that i had broken down crying cuz i was so stressed out and that just made it worse, i was so stressed out and then i just called my dad and was like "im fucking stressed out..." told him the story "...were eating lunch right now, im not going back to school either can you please call the school?" so then he called the school and i guess i've calmed down a bit!! Cept my mom isnt doing good at all..... so i dont even know, i dont think even if i wanted to i could make it through the school day 2maro, i feel like im gonna develop something bad and die from stress, cuz wow.... i need a vacation! I wanna smoke a blunt with my mommy before she goes.... should i? Sarah said how she really wishes she would have smoked with her dad b4 he died... and so yeah... i dunno.... The way i feel, is i want my mommy to be in peace, and im gonna miss her but it is selfish to just be "i dont want my mom to die anytime soon" i mean of corse i dont want her to die, but it would be much better then what she is going through right now, and she is my mommy she'll never be gone, she'll always be with me... ya know? i dunno that is just how i feel.