out in the world
For what it's worth ...
I had a rather good day. Something about the act of putting on smart clothes and arranging self in a smart way, putting on lovely perfume, going to court and finding myself chatting easily with people who know nothing of my angst ... it does help. How did I forget that? People always take me a little out of myself, enough so I can return to the problem with a renewed energy and slightly different perspective.
It was soooo good to be in court though and not in the office, able to write my thoughts and neuroses out. And end up with several solid pages of notes on the next novel. Maybe it wouldn't be so difficult after all. It would just be different. Every novel is a different process, I know that. And as difficult and distressing as that is, you know, at least I'm not repeating myself.
Don't ever repeat yourself, Tim said.
So it'll have its own challenges and I'll scream and throw things but it'll be a happy productive screaming and flailing and bashing at walls. And at the end of it, I'll have the joy of telling people like I did today "I finished my novel" and have them all light up and beam back at me and say "Oh wonderful! Good on you, dri."
Also that faint sense of surprise, as if they all secretly thought I'd never do it. Yeah, don't think I didn't notice that. Don't think I'm not a little smug about proving to you all that I can finish things. Because I can. I always know I can. Just a matter of finishing them to my level of satisfaction.
And in the middle of writing those novel notes, my phone went with a text message from none other than Redhead Dude, asking with slightly uncanny intuition how the post-creative ennui was going. I told him honestly and then asked him he'd like to read the synopsis. Of course he said yes cos apparently he can never resist spoilers. So tonight I emailed it across to him and also asked if he'd care to take a shot at doing up that cover for me since he is a graphic designer himself.
I really hope he can. I'd love to be able to look at an artwork of Sean and Cary and know that he did it. Even if nobody else gets to see it.
Speaking of art, I realised today that my reference pic for Sean on my mobile desktop was no longer relevant. And that jolted me into remembering my reference pic for Lindsey. Morpheus from the Mike Allred pic of the Endless. *points to icon* Ohhhh Lindsey when he had Morpheus hair. How beautiful he was, how unearthly and alluring and so very very much a creature of his own making.
I'm going to fuck him up so much. Mwahahahahaha. Now that I know I can. Oh fuck, yes. Tear that preternatural confidence right down to expose the innards of him. Because I am the writer and that is my power. Mwahahahaha.
So I googled that pic on my phone while waiting to cross the road to World Square and by the time I got to court, my Facebook profile pic was Gaimanified. And earlier tonight, I found my first and most favourite image of Morpheus from The Books Of Magic so that's my newer profile pic. And ohhh yes, the visual impetus of Lindsey Donovan with his blue silver eyes and his curling smile.
Today in talking to the court officers about my novel, I realised with slight stupidity that I don't actually have to wait until I get the MAA report back to contact agents. I have a finished manuscript and now I have a synopsis too. I could contact them now. The report will just be a bonus.
Was going to send off a few emails tonight --- not that the Sydney literary agent pool is that huge for fiction --- but have run out of energy so I'll do it tomorrow, methinks. Once I look up the protocol for multiple agent queries cos I'm pretty sure everything I've read to date has said that's a no-no.
Also just sent the synopsis to that son of my Aunt's customer who has a book coming out soon. I thought he would be a bit awkward and diffident when I asked but he wasn't. He was really sweet so I've sent it and be damned to me. I have altered the genres, though, to Adult Fiction / Romance / Erotica. That looks more flexible, right? More interesting? More accurate.
In the office tomorrow. Bracing myself for a solid day's work. But it'll be good to see everybody again and joke around.
It's all good. Or almost good, anyway.
I had a rather good day. Something about the act of putting on smart clothes and arranging self in a smart way, putting on lovely perfume, going to court and finding myself chatting easily with people who know nothing of my angst ... it does help. How did I forget that? People always take me a little out of myself, enough so I can return to the problem with a renewed energy and slightly different perspective.
It was soooo good to be in court though and not in the office, able to write my thoughts and neuroses out. And end up with several solid pages of notes on the next novel. Maybe it wouldn't be so difficult after all. It would just be different. Every novel is a different process, I know that. And as difficult and distressing as that is, you know, at least I'm not repeating myself.
Don't ever repeat yourself, Tim said.
So it'll have its own challenges and I'll scream and throw things but it'll be a happy productive screaming and flailing and bashing at walls. And at the end of it, I'll have the joy of telling people like I did today "I finished my novel" and have them all light up and beam back at me and say "Oh wonderful! Good on you, dri."
Also that faint sense of surprise, as if they all secretly thought I'd never do it. Yeah, don't think I didn't notice that. Don't think I'm not a little smug about proving to you all that I can finish things. Because I can. I always know I can. Just a matter of finishing them to my level of satisfaction.
And in the middle of writing those novel notes, my phone went with a text message from none other than Redhead Dude, asking with slightly uncanny intuition how the post-creative ennui was going. I told him honestly and then asked him he'd like to read the synopsis. Of course he said yes cos apparently he can never resist spoilers. So tonight I emailed it across to him and also asked if he'd care to take a shot at doing up that cover for me since he is a graphic designer himself.
I really hope he can. I'd love to be able to look at an artwork of Sean and Cary and know that he did it. Even if nobody else gets to see it.
Speaking of art, I realised today that my reference pic for Sean on my mobile desktop was no longer relevant. And that jolted me into remembering my reference pic for Lindsey. Morpheus from the Mike Allred pic of the Endless. *points to icon* Ohhhh Lindsey when he had Morpheus hair. How beautiful he was, how unearthly and alluring and so very very much a creature of his own making.
I'm going to fuck him up so much. Mwahahahahaha. Now that I know I can. Oh fuck, yes. Tear that preternatural confidence right down to expose the innards of him. Because I am the writer and that is my power. Mwahahahaha.
So I googled that pic on my phone while waiting to cross the road to World Square and by the time I got to court, my Facebook profile pic was Gaimanified. And earlier tonight, I found my first and most favourite image of Morpheus from The Books Of Magic so that's my newer profile pic. And ohhh yes, the visual impetus of Lindsey Donovan with his blue silver eyes and his curling smile.
Today in talking to the court officers about my novel, I realised with slight stupidity that I don't actually have to wait until I get the MAA report back to contact agents. I have a finished manuscript and now I have a synopsis too. I could contact them now. The report will just be a bonus.
Was going to send off a few emails tonight --- not that the Sydney literary agent pool is that huge for fiction --- but have run out of energy so I'll do it tomorrow, methinks. Once I look up the protocol for multiple agent queries cos I'm pretty sure everything I've read to date has said that's a no-no.
Also just sent the synopsis to that son of my Aunt's customer who has a book coming out soon. I thought he would be a bit awkward and diffident when I asked but he wasn't. He was really sweet so I've sent it and be damned to me. I have altered the genres, though, to Adult Fiction / Romance / Erotica. That looks more flexible, right? More interesting? More accurate.
In the office tomorrow. Bracing myself for a solid day's work. But it'll be good to see everybody again and joke around.
It's all good. Or almost good, anyway.