worthless

[aquafi]

I'm a bad, bad, bad, bad person. A horribly bad person.

So my mom asks me to drive her to the UT hospital, and I tell her that I'm scared of the road and mention that I have a lot of homework to get done, and I try to get Jay to do it.

I am scared of the road. I've had my license for a month, I haven't driven in two weeks, I've never driven on the interstate, and I'm completely petrified of cars.

Then I discover that Jay is very, very sick with a headache and strep throat.

Mom, knowing I don't want to do it, says it's fine, she'll drive herself.

It's not until she leaves that I realize that she's probably not sure if she can get back afterwards on her own. She had a spinal tap done on her spine recently, and she says it's leaking. She's going to go get it fixed. She will be in no shape to drive back.

I'm not a very good daughter. I'm a horrible, horrible daughter and it's going to take me forever to get over this guilt trip. I don't think I can forgive myself.

I wish she'd come back again so that I can drive her. I'd feel so much better if she did.