hmm hmm
Well lets see.. Long time no update right? Well my life has been kinda hectic lately, with work, getting ink permanently burned into my skin, finding love again, getting ready to go to college, and other things of that nature. I broke up with Casey, because I don't know, I didn't feel too attached to her, and I didn't want to just continue leading her on when I didn't have the feelings she thought I did. Kinda thing sucks, because I know how girls are at that age but I don't know. I just felt like too much of an older brother rather than a boyfriend and it wasn't very fun for me.
The whole college thing isn't coming along as smoothly as I could have hoped. 4 weeks left until school starts, and Moe and I still have no apartment, nor do we have anything set up at all. I thought Philly was going to be this great experience, I was psyched, and now as it comes creeping along, I don't want to leave home. It sucks because I don't want to ditch out on Moe at the last minute, because if he's by himself, he won't make it. I don't know, I think I may go for a semester and then transfer back up here or something of that nature.
Anxiety. Pretty much sums up my life in a nutshell. Sometimes this shit just takes everything I have out of me. Leaves me feeling empty, alone, and I don't know where it's all coming from to be honest. I'll have an anxiety attack at just about the most random time. I can be in a perfectly good mood, nothing bad on my mind, and then bam it hits me. It's kind've hard to explain, and it's kind've hard to live with but thats life I suppose.
My love life is slowly picking itself back up, which is good. Sam and I have been hanging out alot, and every single day it feels more and more like the good ole days. I missed her alot. I didn't realize it, but I did. Seeing her brings a smile to my face, and I know that no other girl can affect me in that way. I love the girl for crying out loud. I never loved anything in my love, and I probably never will love anything besides that girl. But atleast I love something. I missed the cuddling, the watching movies , the staying up until 3 in the morning just talking about things. I've never had such a connection with another person and its crazy to think I tried to throw that all away. We're gonna end up married. There is pretty much no way around it. No matter how much shit we put eachother through, in the end, we always end up back by eachothers side.
I don't know where my life is taking me. I don't know where I'm going to be in 5 years let alone 2. But I do know that I love that girl. I do know that one of my goals in life is to forever make her happy. and i do know one day I'll get rid of all this anxiety, and with her help, maybe sooner than I thought. I'm randomly typing thoughts, but I guess that is a good thing. Getting some things of my chest if you will. I don't know. We'll see where life takes me
<3<3 Peace out
The whole college thing isn't coming along as smoothly as I could have hoped. 4 weeks left until school starts, and Moe and I still have no apartment, nor do we have anything set up at all. I thought Philly was going to be this great experience, I was psyched, and now as it comes creeping along, I don't want to leave home. It sucks because I don't want to ditch out on Moe at the last minute, because if he's by himself, he won't make it. I don't know, I think I may go for a semester and then transfer back up here or something of that nature.
Anxiety. Pretty much sums up my life in a nutshell. Sometimes this shit just takes everything I have out of me. Leaves me feeling empty, alone, and I don't know where it's all coming from to be honest. I'll have an anxiety attack at just about the most random time. I can be in a perfectly good mood, nothing bad on my mind, and then bam it hits me. It's kind've hard to explain, and it's kind've hard to live with but thats life I suppose.
My love life is slowly picking itself back up, which is good. Sam and I have been hanging out alot, and every single day it feels more and more like the good ole days. I missed her alot. I didn't realize it, but I did. Seeing her brings a smile to my face, and I know that no other girl can affect me in that way. I love the girl for crying out loud. I never loved anything in my love, and I probably never will love anything besides that girl. But atleast I love something. I missed the cuddling, the watching movies , the staying up until 3 in the morning just talking about things. I've never had such a connection with another person and its crazy to think I tried to throw that all away. We're gonna end up married. There is pretty much no way around it. No matter how much shit we put eachother through, in the end, we always end up back by eachothers side.
I don't know where my life is taking me. I don't know where I'm going to be in 5 years let alone 2. But I do know that I love that girl. I do know that one of my goals in life is to forever make her happy. and i do know one day I'll get rid of all this anxiety, and with her help, maybe sooner than I thought. I'm randomly typing thoughts, but I guess that is a good thing. Getting some things of my chest if you will. I don't know. We'll see where life takes me
<3<3 Peace out