Why i heart life
before this week if you would have asked me what the greatest feeling in the world was, i would have told you "being in love". that was the best feeling i had ever felt. but after this weekend, and the weeks prior, i would give you a different answer. and that is pride. (the good kind) the kind of self confidence and self esteem one can only find for themselves. i did it guys! yay me. since i've been back at school, i've been eating right, eating less, and exercising more. i was so proud of myself today when i did the precor machine for 25 minutes (along with my other workout stuff). people who play sports and stuff may not think thats a big deal. but for someone (me) who hasn't eaten anything good or done any type of exercise for over two years, its a big deal. i'm so proud of myself for going every day. and i'm really organized and focused on my classes, which are going awesome so far. and i grew a spine! (a little one). i'm still pretty passive, but i'm finding tactful ways to stand up for myself.
most importantly, i got my heart in the right place. i got rid of some things in my life that were hurting my heart. friends and family members consistently tell me to take care of myself and stop being so concerned for others. so well right now i have no one to worry or care about, (exccept toby!) so i kinda was forced to focus on taking care of myself. and i'm so happy! i seriously can't stop smiling. i've been taking care of my body, getting enough sleep, cleaning up after myself. and now i have energy, and my disposistion is just better.
i can feel myself growing up is what i guess i'm trying to say. things that i thought i needed i realize now i don't need. and the things i always knew i needed i'm actually doing something about.
yay me!
disclamer: i'm not self absorbed, i promise. check my archives, look how self loathing i was! so this is a good thing. i'm done now.
most importantly, i got my heart in the right place. i got rid of some things in my life that were hurting my heart. friends and family members consistently tell me to take care of myself and stop being so concerned for others. so well right now i have no one to worry or care about, (exccept toby!) so i kinda was forced to focus on taking care of myself. and i'm so happy! i seriously can't stop smiling. i've been taking care of my body, getting enough sleep, cleaning up after myself. and now i have energy, and my disposistion is just better.
i can feel myself growing up is what i guess i'm trying to say. things that i thought i needed i realize now i don't need. and the things i always knew i needed i'm actually doing something about.
yay me!
disclamer: i'm not self absorbed, i promise. check my archives, look how self loathing i was! so this is a good thing. i'm done now.