insomniac
i think that i am turning into a bona fide insomniac, except this time minus the perk of choice. the latest trend is falling asleep for about two hours and waking up unable to fall asleep. the trickiest part is when i do fall asleep, i feel so tired and relieved - thinking that perhaps maybe this time i will sleep through the night, but no. it's so strange too because i don't feel that tired, but i revel in my sleep time so this is quite confusing.
on another random note, today i went to my grandfather's wake and in a few hours (more than a few) i will be going to the funeral. i feel like an emotional zombie. i feel like a lot of the time, i am really demonstrative in my feelings, wear my heart on my sleeve so to speak (slash cry in my history class at the mere mention of college - oh memories). but on this subject, i have been devoid of emotion and it's really bothering me.
today while i was waiting outside in the snow for my mom to pick me up, it was snowing. and perfect little snowflakes were falling on my hair in their entirety instead of exploding on contact. it was quite chilly outside but i was entranced by the complexity of something so small, so perfectly formed. (eboo brought the perfection of this moment to my attention). i wanted to write a poem on it but i would fail to capture the simplicity and wonder of that moment so i haven't. like mrs. brown baking a cake, mrs. dalloway planning a party or mrs. woolf writing the novel of a lifetime ... i'm going to reread that book, as well as mrs. dalloway. i love rereading books over and over again. (wow, car alarm is going off, i wonder if anyone will turn it off at 4:03 am ... and i am thinking no) but i always wonder that during the time that i'm rereading one book, i could be spending that time reading another because at this point, i will not be able to read a mere fraction of the books out there. which i suppose is wonderful in it's own respect. haha, maybe i should make it a goal.
another random note, i was always very jealous of belle in beauty and the beast when he gave her the library. if some guy gave me a library that size, i would be his forever, even if he did have fangs and was extremely hairy (kidding). however, i'd probably be just as excited if i got a really good book. also, in reference to getting books as presents, i think it is absolutely imperative to write a message in the front.
i apologize for the complete randomness of this entry. by the by for those who were concerned, the car alarm has ceased. i wonder if it has a timer for situations such as these (i'm thinking probably). oh my god! a yawn! this must be capitalized on! perhaps i'll fall asleep. goodnight, dear void. (name that movie)
on another random note, today i went to my grandfather's wake and in a few hours (more than a few) i will be going to the funeral. i feel like an emotional zombie. i feel like a lot of the time, i am really demonstrative in my feelings, wear my heart on my sleeve so to speak (slash cry in my history class at the mere mention of college - oh memories). but on this subject, i have been devoid of emotion and it's really bothering me.
today while i was waiting outside in the snow for my mom to pick me up, it was snowing. and perfect little snowflakes were falling on my hair in their entirety instead of exploding on contact. it was quite chilly outside but i was entranced by the complexity of something so small, so perfectly formed. (eboo brought the perfection of this moment to my attention). i wanted to write a poem on it but i would fail to capture the simplicity and wonder of that moment so i haven't. like mrs. brown baking a cake, mrs. dalloway planning a party or mrs. woolf writing the novel of a lifetime ... i'm going to reread that book, as well as mrs. dalloway. i love rereading books over and over again. (wow, car alarm is going off, i wonder if anyone will turn it off at 4:03 am ... and i am thinking no) but i always wonder that during the time that i'm rereading one book, i could be spending that time reading another because at this point, i will not be able to read a mere fraction of the books out there. which i suppose is wonderful in it's own respect. haha, maybe i should make it a goal.
another random note, i was always very jealous of belle in beauty and the beast when he gave her the library. if some guy gave me a library that size, i would be his forever, even if he did have fangs and was extremely hairy (kidding). however, i'd probably be just as excited if i got a really good book. also, in reference to getting books as presents, i think it is absolutely imperative to write a message in the front.
i apologize for the complete randomness of this entry. by the by for those who were concerned, the car alarm has ceased. i wonder if it has a timer for situations such as these (i'm thinking probably). oh my god! a yawn! this must be capitalized on! perhaps i'll fall asleep. goodnight, dear void. (name that movie)