awake!!
i've been waking up REALLY early every morning, even when i don't have anything to do until the late afternoon...this morning i had to tell myself that 8:30 was too early to wake up and slept for another hour. still 9:30 am on a day i don't have to be at work until 5?! crazy.
i have spent the morning reading different feminist blogs/articles and have found a lot of interesting things. i suppose i am always reading pretty interesting stuff though. there are a couple of books i would like to get my hands on. i was trying to remember the titles but i already went to amazon and put them on my wishlist.
i'm anxious to write my application essay for hollins. i have been thinking about it and really trying to figure out what it is that i want to say in the essay. i mean, the question is asking who the female i most admire (not family) is....i admire a ton of women. for so many things that it feels impossible to pick one and talk about how she has solely affected my life. but, the question is, if i do it any other way is it going to matter? would it be okay for me to write about qualities i admire in women and talk about a few key women who possess those qualities? the problem is just that there are so many women in the world that i have come to admire greatly and i just feel guilty (yes, it's fucked) only talking about one woman...and the difficulty in picking JUST ONE is driving me crazy! anne sexton, virginia woolf, helene cixous, adrienne rich, gertrude stein, ani difranco, virginia alice cottey, ALL of the women who fought for the right to vote...the list goes on and on and on and fuck! how the hell am i going to write this essay if i can't even pinpoint the woman i'd like to talk about!?!
i'm stopping to breathe for a minute. if you are still reading this, i am sorry for brainstorming on lj. like i said, i'm just very very anxious.
i need to run to the post office and then sit down and either read a book or sit down and really start doing this essay. i know i am going to go through several revisions and i just know i need to be confident in the essay i send it. also, keep in mind that i haven't written an essay since last fall...
if anybody has any suggestions, either comment me or call...i can almost guarantee that i'll be at home stressing over this very issue until i go to work and also when i get home from work...
:)