Catching rain on my tongue.
My first weekend off was nothing short of great. I went shopping and bought myself the mp3 player I've been eyeing for months. It's the best purchase I've made in ages. I can't stop doting over it, taking it with me wherever I go and gliding my fingers over it's shiny new exterior. This is love. I also got to spend some much-needed time with young Daniel and sleeping beside each other in my cramped little single-mattress bed has never been more wonderful. What a pleasure to wake in the middle of the night, almost unconsciously, extending an arm out in the dark to wrap it around him.
We went to his cousin Lucas' birthday BBQ today and I got to meet even more members of the extended family. I love those kind of gatherings. I feel a little like I'm under the microscope, confident that I'll win them over but still that tad bit nervous that they're thinking 'Hm, what's the deal with this kid?'.
Work again tomorrow like the rest of the 9 to 5 workforce. I'm slowly making pace with the whole schedule of a day job. At around three every afternoon, I feel like collapsing under my desk and tucking myself away for a little nap. There's enough room down there to do so. I gave it a go last Thursday. Not bad. On Saturday, just after dinner, Dan's fam was talking about death and burial and I zoned out with thoughts of my own death. Since I was a kid it's really bummed me out to think that I won't always be around. I want to be. I want to see it all and meet everyone and achieve truckloads. It's hard for me to accept that the world's gonna be brilliant without me. That's pretty arrogant hey. Maybe by the time I'm an old lady I'll think differently. I'll probably be sitting in my crochet-knitted cardigan and petticoat, embracing the possibility that maybe today, I'll find my heaven.
We went to his cousin Lucas' birthday BBQ today and I got to meet even more members of the extended family. I love those kind of gatherings. I feel a little like I'm under the microscope, confident that I'll win them over but still that tad bit nervous that they're thinking 'Hm, what's the deal with this kid?'.
Work again tomorrow like the rest of the 9 to 5 workforce. I'm slowly making pace with the whole schedule of a day job. At around three every afternoon, I feel like collapsing under my desk and tucking myself away for a little nap. There's enough room down there to do so. I gave it a go last Thursday. Not bad. On Saturday, just after dinner, Dan's fam was talking about death and burial and I zoned out with thoughts of my own death. Since I was a kid it's really bummed me out to think that I won't always be around. I want to be. I want to see it all and meet everyone and achieve truckloads. It's hard for me to accept that the world's gonna be brilliant without me. That's pretty arrogant hey. Maybe by the time I'm an old lady I'll think differently. I'll probably be sitting in my crochet-knitted cardigan and petticoat, embracing the possibility that maybe today, I'll find my heaven.