ugh agh
it annoys me, quite, that presently my life (has to) revolve(s) around the exams coming up in april and in may. it doesn't have to, really, but i just, for the sake of all things nice and fuzzy, can't escape myself thoughts.
i can't do anything without worrying about it.
(i can, ipso facto, but then on a split second i would realize something is missing and i would think to myself "hey, aren't i supposed to be worried about something? ...oh, yeah! the exams! gosh darn.")
i can't read a book without trying to hurry it up because i keep thinking that i'm supposed to read textbooks instead, i can't laugh without feeling the burden that i should keep my mouth shut and listen to teachers instead.
it's like a memento mori. remember that you are mortal. remember that you have exams coming up.
i get constantly uneasy but i'm still lazy (and the rhymes weren't intended).
i can't wait until this is all over. (although) i can't bear the thought of leaving high school behind. and i can't imagine not constantly meeting these kids, these people that i've met for almost every day in the past three years of my life, anymore.
i typed so many can'ts in this entry and i can feel some more can'ts threatening to spill out from the back of my throat. /pessimistic