Read it.
Burgundy's HOT/NOT list for Summer 05
HOT
1. Wonder Showzen.
If the Vice clan hijacked Sesame Street with the aid of escaped mental patients you'd get results half as funny & hallucinogenic. Every third laugh comes accompanied with a guilty wince or a groan.
2. "Douchebag".
After a strong winter, this term continues its domination into the warmer portion of the year. It's so perfect it can't be touched.
3. Getting as tan as I can, despite the health risks.
Dude, I'm half-Mexican. Lay off.
4. Alize/Shots of wheatgrass.
The official drunk drink of the summer, in all its syrupy technicolor glory needs to be followed in the morning by shots of the potent rejuvenating green stuff. Let Mother Nature give you a nice backrub after you spent all night making an ass out of yourself & puking your guts out.
5. "Private Joy".
Summer couldn't be complete without a hot dance theme & I think this one's got what it takes. Who can resist a synthy pop ode to a vibrator that sounds like it should accompany an 80s exercise video? Come on, baby, GET UP!
NOT
1. Spending all day in an office.
This is never cool. It's ESPECIALLY not cool during the summer.
2. Bees.
I would punch every bee in the face.
3. Mosquitoes.
These assholes, too. Punch them & tear their wings off.
4. Hot, stuffy bars with no air circulation.
As much as I hate Lager House, at least it has a patio.
5. Jerks.
Seriously, what is up with these guys?
HOT
1. Wonder Showzen.
If the Vice clan hijacked Sesame Street with the aid of escaped mental patients you'd get results half as funny & hallucinogenic. Every third laugh comes accompanied with a guilty wince or a groan.
2. "Douchebag".
After a strong winter, this term continues its domination into the warmer portion of the year. It's so perfect it can't be touched.
3. Getting as tan as I can, despite the health risks.
Dude, I'm half-Mexican. Lay off.
4. Alize/Shots of wheatgrass.
The official drunk drink of the summer, in all its syrupy technicolor glory needs to be followed in the morning by shots of the potent rejuvenating green stuff. Let Mother Nature give you a nice backrub after you spent all night making an ass out of yourself & puking your guts out.
5. "Private Joy".
Summer couldn't be complete without a hot dance theme & I think this one's got what it takes. Who can resist a synthy pop ode to a vibrator that sounds like it should accompany an 80s exercise video? Come on, baby, GET UP!
NOT
1. Spending all day in an office.
This is never cool. It's ESPECIALLY not cool during the summer.
2. Bees.
I would punch every bee in the face.
3. Mosquitoes.
These assholes, too. Punch them & tear their wings off.
4. Hot, stuffy bars with no air circulation.
As much as I hate Lager House, at least it has a patio.
5. Jerks.
Seriously, what is up with these guys?