aw damn
my throat hurts...my tongue's swollen...my stomach's horrendously unattractive...and i have no control anymore.
sigh.
i'm almost to the point where i just want to tell someone and get myself some help so i can sto letting all this shit control my life.
the problem with me (and probably loads more people) is that it's either i don't eat at all...or i eat too much and can't stop. i can't do it in between. it's nothing or everything (followed by purging). it's hard to decide what to do anymore and sometimes i wonder how i'm getting through every day...and gaining weight unimagineably fast. i think i need the control again.
i'll try again tomorrow (or today..whatever). it's a new day, i'll see if i can try not to screw it up. i have a week and a half left of vacation...let's see what i can make of that time. hopefully something...
nighty night :P
sigh.
i'm almost to the point where i just want to tell someone and get myself some help so i can sto letting all this shit control my life.
the problem with me (and probably loads more people) is that it's either i don't eat at all...or i eat too much and can't stop. i can't do it in between. it's nothing or everything (followed by purging). it's hard to decide what to do anymore and sometimes i wonder how i'm getting through every day...and gaining weight unimagineably fast. i think i need the control again.
i'll try again tomorrow (or today..whatever). it's a new day, i'll see if i can try not to screw it up. i have a week and a half left of vacation...let's see what i can make of that time. hopefully something...
nighty night :P