(no subject)
So its one year. One year with the boy that shook me to my core and changed everything I thought I had figured out.
Time keeps going but I wish it would stand still. I wish I could freeze our moments and spend my whole life reliving them. I wish time couldnt heal or reconstruct or destroy. I dont know what to do when things change so that my heart and mind are going in two completely different directions. I love him with a passion that I no longer control, but I'm scared to death of being with anyone for this amount of time. It got to the point where it wasnt a choice anymore. I stayed with him because he became a such a vital part of me that I felt as though I literally could not be without him. I dont feel that way anymore. I'm with him because although I'm afraid of wasting my life away with the wrong person and never knowing it, I'm more afraid of letting go of the right person. I want this to be a landmark for us as a beginning of a whole new beginning. Yet so many times it turns into the beginning of the end. I want to let go completely, letting fate take over and trusting everything we have in it. But I believe that good things happen because you work for them. Love was hard to find, but this year has been the most rewarding in my life. And I had to fight for it at times. And I'll keep fighting because our moments are worth it. We are worth it.
Time keeps going but I wish it would stand still. I wish I could freeze our moments and spend my whole life reliving them. I wish time couldnt heal or reconstruct or destroy. I dont know what to do when things change so that my heart and mind are going in two completely different directions. I love him with a passion that I no longer control, but I'm scared to death of being with anyone for this amount of time. It got to the point where it wasnt a choice anymore. I stayed with him because he became a such a vital part of me that I felt as though I literally could not be without him. I dont feel that way anymore. I'm with him because although I'm afraid of wasting my life away with the wrong person and never knowing it, I'm more afraid of letting go of the right person. I want this to be a landmark for us as a beginning of a whole new beginning. Yet so many times it turns into the beginning of the end. I want to let go completely, letting fate take over and trusting everything we have in it. But I believe that good things happen because you work for them. Love was hard to find, but this year has been the most rewarding in my life. And I had to fight for it at times. And I'll keep fighting because our moments are worth it. We are worth it.