Becoming very bored of sad 5am night bus feelings though.

[apiphile]

I appreciate that losing weight at around 1lb a day is definitely too fast but I also want to be losing it at this rate so I'm kind of torn as to whether I can be arsed to do anything about it (Also it's "fuck you" day on Sunday and I will probably put it all back on then

Comments

[wolfy_writing]

Losing weight at that speed is seriously scary. People die like that, even if they're not underweight. If I didn't know everything you've said about food recently, I'd think you had cancer. Can you get some kind of help? Maybe some soup? You've got your endocrinologist tomorrow, which means things should be getting significantly better hormone-wise soon, and I'm pretty sure you nearly killing yourself with an eating disorder would delay transitioning

[apiphile]

In which case you'll be pleased to hear that it's probably just my scales that are faulty - hospital weigh-in puts me at 4lbs heavier than my home scales, on the borders of overweight (but also I'm an inch taller than I thought).

Well yeah you're the anti-Lovecraft in every respect, you enjoy travelling the world and meeting people rather than living in the same five square miles with a cat that has a racist name. But you do both like cats.

I know that IN THEORY but "must match people or they'll leave" is quite hardwired.

[wolfy_writing]

Even if the scales are faulty and you have more weight to spare, you don't want to peel off the pounds too quickly, lest malnutrition and metabolic badness set in.

If I had a dog, I would be the opposite of Lovecraft.

Yeah, I figured. I'm hoping my reminders will nudge the bits of your mind freaking out about this a fraction of an inch closer to accepting this. I'm under no illusion about you (or any human) being able to Just Snap Out Of this kind of thing.

[apiphile]

Well you'll be pleased to hear I have a break from restricting today and ate quite a lot of carbs :)

A selling point! Possibly a USP? "Read the works of Amy Parker, The Diametrical Opposite Of H P Lovecraft. Uses words that people have actually heard of to tell stories that make sense!"

I guess sooner or later enough snowflakes become an avalanche ;)

[wolfy_writing]

Good! I'll feel a lot better when you have your testosterone prescription and can bump your daily intake to what I consider reasonable on-a-diet territory and hopefully do something healthier when it comes to asserting control over your body.

I'm not committing to only telling stories that make sense. Have you read "Things You Can Do With A Brick"?

Practice, practice, practice. In your case, practice learning what being treated decently is like.

[apiphile]

Hopefully when the T gets stuck in I will start burning more calories so I'm going to need to eat more anyway. I can't calculate my necessary intake as "male" based on the current levels of testosterone but should be able to in future.

Still makes more narrative sense than flipping Lovecraft.

[wolfy_writing]

Yeah, and it will generally shift your body towards putting on less fat and more muscle, so that'll be nice.