(no subject)
So I was going to try out this idea for a blog post about how tribal identities lead to deindividuation and how "I don't think of you as [queer/trans/a woman/black]" translates to "I think of you as an individual rather than an amorphorous other" a lot of the time, even if it is poorly expressed, and how people aren't A Woman or A Trans Woman so much as [Name], who is a woman/[Name], who is a trans woman, because while the factors of our identity combine together with our experiences to great an individual person, and declaring ourselves to be merely [group identity] instead of [name] is eliding who we are and transforming ourselves into A Demographic rather than a person who is entitled to agree, disagree, think, and feel...
I was going to do that and I was going to do it using a friend of mine as an example but then a thing happened and now I just really want to figure out a way to lose as much weight as I can as quickly as possible so that I don't have to look at my disgusting self any more, and I don't really care if doing it completely destroys my health and knocks twenty years off my life. How can I get this done? Do I need drugs? Can I go for surgery? Can I amputate my own fat?
(being unable to eat/not eating for a certain point after hunger is already conscious puts my brain back into the ED danger zone, where it takes very little to set it off. and now it's been set off all I can think about - at all - is not eating, and how to get as much flesh off me as possible.)
I was going to do that and I was going to do it using a friend of mine as an example but then a thing happened and now I just really want to figure out a way to lose as much weight as I can as quickly as possible so that I don't have to look at my disgusting self any more, and I don't really care if doing it completely destroys my health and knocks twenty years off my life. How can I get this done? Do I need drugs? Can I go for surgery? Can I amputate my own fat?
(being unable to eat/not eating for a certain point after hunger is already conscious puts my brain back into the ED danger zone, where it takes very little to set it off. and now it's been set off all I can think about - at all - is not eating, and how to get as much flesh off me as possible.)