(no subject)

[apiphile]

Lunchtime introspection woe: I can't work out whether the complete inability to empathise (and whether it's connected to) and lack of love for family members is innate, and possibly Autism (in which case why do people like Amy, who come from revoltingly bad families, still manage to have some sort of emotional connection besides "disgust" to their family, and also Autism?), or whether it's something that's happened as a result of events (in which case see previous parenthesis), or whether it's another, more difficult problem. And also: why the fuck does no one believe me when I explain how my fucking brain works? I literally get into arguments with people about WHAT I AM CAPABLE OF FEELING because apparently being the only person who actually knows WHAT I FEEL is not good enough, and people who have known me ten minutes are better experts on my emotional responses and long-term emotional position on interactions than I am.

Also why the fuck is it so difficult to convince people that actually it's entirely okay to not have a family and to not want one.