It is freezing fucking cold all the time and dark. In summer.

[apiphile]

It was the week after Martha died

Comments

[apiphile]

I have rather made those innocent poppies unduly sinister.

[apiphile]

Ah but what if they whispered? what would they say? hrm.

[apiphile]

Weirdly for someone who has had not infrequent experience of some fairly zany visual hallucinations, I've had really very few auditory ones and I'm bloody grateful for it - the only occasion I can really bring to mind as being "hallucination" rather than just "mishearing" was just an extension of the delusions I was experiencing at the time, in the voice of the people I was obsessed were intent on my downfall. Which wasn't wildly pleasant, but as they weren't there at the time it was easy enough to go "well, maybe they think that, but they're not here saying it". Poppies growing from the ceiling I imagine would be fairly reproachful.

[apiphile]

Whoof, it sounds disorienting to me. Every so often I get a full-blown hallucination for a minute or two - rather than the usual "oh I thought there were beetles/mould/cats there" kind or standard "the carpet is maggots maybe sleep?" - which either overlays reality with some bizarre additions or changes the ... I guess the genre? of reality. But those are rarer. It's weird because different moods come with them. Like the transparent horses and the tiny white cranes were lovely, the spy vs spy re-enactments were funny if distracting, but stuff like the AND NOW IT'S A WEIRD EARLY ANIMATION CARTOON WORLD and the WOMEN DON'T HAVE FACES ANY MORE ONLY BLACK SMUDGES stuff was really upsetting. The worst ones tend to be writing that I can't quite read but which is VITALLY IMPORTANT (it's often in the wrong language, too), and the motherfucking stalking-fork. Being stalked by a crawling fork: sounds funny, doesn't feel it.

[pospreterito]

or your name, over and over, in the voices of childhood enemies!

...i have stupidly obnoxious auditory hallucinations, a lot.