in short, currently PROPER NUTS.
Last night was an interesting exercise in BEING TOO INSANE TO SLEEP while my mind rampaged around trying to do ... something. I have no idea. It was like having a volcano crossed with a very, very, very angry dog or ten thrashing about in there. Now that I've woken up a bit I'm sort of ... mildly less twitchy, largely because I've got a mental programme running that repeatedly says "yes, but that doesn't matter, and you have to go to work now". CONCENTRATE ON THE VERY BORING TASK IN FRONT OF YOU, DON'T THINK ABOUT THIS OTHER SHIT.
"This other shit" is comprised mostly of things/feelings that are supposed to be buried and CALM DOWN QUIT YELLING NO ONE IS GOING TO AGREE WITH YOU JUST SWALLOW IT. Ugh. Calm the fuck down calm the fuck down it doesn't matter.
Oh also I finished reading that book I've been rambling about (thank fuck) and it was an extremely good book and I am never reading it again.
1. Even though I can see how Jacob must look to everyone else, I'm on his side.
2. I am actually kind of hoping Ferris died of that beating.
3. Some other stuff regarding a phrase I read somewhere about there being nothing so cruel as a good man.
Anyway, I am aware that not really eating is making me more crazy, but I don't want to eat. At all. Ever again.
"This other shit" is comprised mostly of things/feelings that are supposed to be buried and CALM DOWN QUIT YELLING NO ONE IS GOING TO AGREE WITH YOU JUST SWALLOW IT. Ugh. Calm the fuck down calm the fuck down it doesn't matter.
Oh also I finished reading that book I've been rambling about (thank fuck) and it was an extremely good book and I am never reading it again.
1. Even though I can see how Jacob must look to everyone else, I'm on his side.
2. I am actually kind of hoping Ferris died of that beating.
3. Some other stuff regarding a phrase I read somewhere about there being nothing so cruel as a good man.
Anyway, I am aware that not really eating is making me more crazy, but I don't want to eat. At all. Ever again.