So I was sitting in the sun most of the afternoon, reading Gen Kill
and I wrote this long rambling thing which I can't be bothered to type out again, so the salient points here are:
1. I am not a joiner, this will fuck me for my entire life because "joiners" is what humanity are, I cannot hack anything that requires me to have an identity as A Team Member because it elides my own extremely fragile sense of self.
2. I have made angry noises about pep talks in the past and how I hate receiving them; I don't mind realism ("Del stop being melodramatic, this is the start of the thing, and you're new to it") but the others ("I know you can do this, you're so smart") just don't register as encouragement so much as assertions that 'I know who you are and what you're capable of better than you do', which comes off as i) deeply disrepectful of my own ability for self-awareness and ii) threatening.
(Please do not ask about derby/work experience, today has been a day of London representing itself badly via people, which is a shame because as a place it has been unutterably gorgeous and I met many dogs: a cowprint Great Dane, a ginger pit bull, and a nervous and noisy Bichon Frisse. Presented in order of how awesome they were as dogs).
Regarding Generation Kill: I am finding as swear_jar found that this is making my vocabularly about 400000x more offensive than it already was, so if you get the blunt end of some serious profanity in the next week or so, please don't assume you have in some way pissed me off. I may be expressing nothing more than "GOSH, IT'S GOOD TO SEE YOU".
1. I am not a joiner, this will fuck me for my entire life because "joiners" is what humanity are, I cannot hack anything that requires me to have an identity as A Team Member because it elides my own extremely fragile sense of self.
2. I have made angry noises about pep talks in the past and how I hate receiving them; I don't mind realism ("Del stop being melodramatic, this is the start of the thing, and you're new to it") but the others ("I know you can do this, you're so smart") just don't register as encouragement so much as assertions that 'I know who you are and what you're capable of better than you do', which comes off as i) deeply disrepectful of my own ability for self-awareness and ii) threatening.
(Please do not ask about derby/work experience, today has been a day of London representing itself badly via people, which is a shame because as a place it has been unutterably gorgeous and I met many dogs: a cowprint Great Dane, a ginger pit bull, and a nervous and noisy Bichon Frisse. Presented in order of how awesome they were as dogs).
Regarding Generation Kill: I am finding as swear_jar found that this is making my vocabularly about 400000x more offensive than it already was, so if you get the blunt end of some serious profanity in the next week or so, please don't assume you have in some way pissed me off. I may be expressing nothing more than "GOSH, IT'S GOOD TO SEE YOU".