(no subject)
I feel like I've been here forever.
It's only been a week.
I'm in a horrible mood.
It's not good to update only when I'm in a bad mood because then it never seems like I'm having fun.
Generally I am.
I'm just overwhelmed.
I want to be straight.
That sucks when I go to all girls school.
I feel really dumb here.
I feel like I can't ever articulate my thoughts and that what I have to say is stupid.
I feel like I have lost any slight bit of intellagence I may have had.
I don't know how that happened.
I don't feel comfortalbe crying to anyone and I know that I could, but I don't want to.
I know that I'm going to cry when I'm trying to go to sleep later.
I've realized how much i like patterns, and how much I like structure.
I like being independant but there's still stuff I want to be helped with.
I feel like I've been cutting off contact with people who aren't here.
But it's not on purpose at all.
I'm just busy.
But I also don't make the time really.
I don't know why.
I'm sad, and I'm afraid to know how long it will last.
I need companionship.
Like real companionship.
I'm struggling a lot about my dad.
I forget about it and then remember when someone says something about thier father.
Which happens a lot.
I feel really young.
I feel like I haven't truly expierenced the world at all.
Even though I know I have.
I'm not getting myself into bad situations.
Which is good.
And I'm trying my hardest to make decisions and to do things using my head instead of my heart.
But it's hard.
I know the right things to do though.
I've forgotten the summer already.
I didn't think it was going to happen this fast.
But it has.
I forget a lot of things.
It makes me upset.
Dar Williams is playing here tomorrow night.
That fact is exciting.
Especially since the tickets were free.
I had the most delicious pesto chicken salad sandwich today.
I was crazy rediculous earlier today so I guess it's not so much of a surprise that I've crashed.
I just hate it when it happens.
I think I just need some sleep.
I usually forget about stuff when I wake up.
But sometimes not.
Tomorrow is the rugby meeting.
I'm going to play.
This was absurdly long.
I'm done.
I'm done with this shit.
It's only been a week.
I'm in a horrible mood.
It's not good to update only when I'm in a bad mood because then it never seems like I'm having fun.
Generally I am.
I'm just overwhelmed.
I want to be straight.
That sucks when I go to all girls school.
I feel really dumb here.
I feel like I can't ever articulate my thoughts and that what I have to say is stupid.
I feel like I have lost any slight bit of intellagence I may have had.
I don't know how that happened.
I don't feel comfortalbe crying to anyone and I know that I could, but I don't want to.
I know that I'm going to cry when I'm trying to go to sleep later.
I've realized how much i like patterns, and how much I like structure.
I like being independant but there's still stuff I want to be helped with.
I feel like I've been cutting off contact with people who aren't here.
But it's not on purpose at all.
I'm just busy.
But I also don't make the time really.
I don't know why.
I'm sad, and I'm afraid to know how long it will last.
I need companionship.
Like real companionship.
I'm struggling a lot about my dad.
I forget about it and then remember when someone says something about thier father.
Which happens a lot.
I feel really young.
I feel like I haven't truly expierenced the world at all.
Even though I know I have.
I'm not getting myself into bad situations.
Which is good.
And I'm trying my hardest to make decisions and to do things using my head instead of my heart.
But it's hard.
I know the right things to do though.
I've forgotten the summer already.
I didn't think it was going to happen this fast.
But it has.
I forget a lot of things.
It makes me upset.
Dar Williams is playing here tomorrow night.
That fact is exciting.
Especially since the tickets were free.
I had the most delicious pesto chicken salad sandwich today.
I was crazy rediculous earlier today so I guess it's not so much of a surprise that I've crashed.
I just hate it when it happens.
I think I just need some sleep.
I usually forget about stuff when I wake up.
But sometimes not.
Tomorrow is the rugby meeting.
I'm going to play.
This was absurdly long.
I'm done.
I'm done with this shit.