(Untitled)

[brb_war]

*A US military copter flies low to the ground coming out of nowhere and hovers only a few feet off the ground while a single soldier jumps out decked out in full drab camo utility uniform, belts of ammo criss-crossing over his chest, and carrying a M16 rifle in his arms ready to shoot at a moment's notice. He crouches low as he runs from the copter

Comments

[chairman_yao]

I am not familiar with anyone called Victor or Charlie... Are those some of Kirkland's 'fairy friends'?

[brb_war]

The hell?

I'm talking about the Vietcong, not pixies!

[chairman_yao]

You might as well be talking about pixies for all the sense you are making.

Have you been drinking? *spies all the ammo* .....with Switzerland?

[brb_war]

I haven't been drinking! I've been fighting a war! *raises his rifle at China*

Don't act all buddy-buddy with me, Red.

[chairman_yao]

*calmly steps closer to the rifle*

Do not idly threaten me, Jones. You are not going to shoot me, so put that gun down and stop embarrassing yourself.

[brb_war]

I don't give idle threats. *Glares and but doesn't put down the gun* You're just lucky I don't know where I am. If we were in Vietnam, it'd be a different matter.

[chairman_yao]

*nods to the puzzling logic of that statement, stepping ever closer to the gun and positioning the barrel over his heart*

Well yes, it would be different. I would be having tea with my sister in her house and you would be lost and humiliated in a jungle somewhere. But what does that have to do with anything?

[brb_war]

*Growls, so tempted to just pull the trigger right then and now. Instead, he quickly twists the rifle around and roughly shoves the butt into China's shoulder to make him back away.*

Well that's too bad, so sad. Such a shame you can't have your damn tea.

[chairman_yao]

*rubs his shoulder and winces* Aiyah! America so big and mean! *smiles* So full of empty idle threats!

I can always have tea with her in her room, of course. You are welcome to get lost and humiliated in her closet if you feel you need to be there~

[brb_war]

Hmph! The only reason I would have to go near her room is to finish her off once and for all to put an end to your communism!

[chairman_yao]

Oh! But you cannot do that!

[brb_war]

*Grabs China's oh so fine silky shirt collar and drags him close.* Tell me, where are we?

[chairman_yao]

*looks up at America with wide eyes and smiles*

Communist Island Headquarters, of course. We a filming a new reality show. Capitalists are dropped in, we hunt them down, it is quite popul-

*swiftly slams a knee into Alfred's star-spangled crotch*

[brb_war]

*makes a strangled noise of pure agonizing pain and lets go of China as he drops to his knees! He mutters a number of communist and racial curses under his squeaking breath unable to do more than that.*

[chairman_yao]

Do not idly threaten me. Do not demand answers from me. Do. Not. Touch. Me.

*relieves Alfred of his gun and removes the magazine* I am not afraid of you, aru.

[chairman_yao]

*perks up*

So, now that we understand each other, I look forward to better diplomatic relations!

*Yao steps around Alfred, ignoring The American's gasps of man-pain, and makes his way back to HQ. Guns are so not cute, but it is impolite to be critical about gifts*