*sniff* Something's in the air.
Yesterday marked the unofficial end of summer. Not that yours truly needed a calendar to know that. The scent of the transition from summer to fall is very strong, and as always, it's having a profound effect on me. I'm not entirely certain what kind of effect it's had this year just yet, but one thing I am sure of is that's time for me to move on.... Perhaps wiping the slate clean with something from the past, or starting fresh with something completely new. Who knows?
Of course, major epiphanies like these aren't formed solely on the basis of a scent in the air. Eh, who am I kidding, I do that all the time. hehe Anyway, I think it was also the trip to Otakon which awakened this need in me to search. Prior to that weekend, my fears(rational or irrational)held me back from really experiencing anything. Well, I did experience things, but only in the "safe" manner in which I allowed myself to experience them. For the first time in a decade, I think I can safely say I'm finished taking the blame for something that wasn't my fault. I can't control or predict how someone is going to react to a particular situation, and I couldn't control it then. The choice that was made had nothing to do with me.
Wow. Sounds so painfully simple. Part of me wants to lament over the fact that had I only figured it out sooner....but you know what? I didn't. There's no set time line for things like this. I know it now, and that's all that matters.
All this searching is going to be a blast. Especially since I can finally embrace what I find.
Of course, major epiphanies like these aren't formed solely on the basis of a scent in the air. Eh, who am I kidding, I do that all the time. hehe Anyway, I think it was also the trip to Otakon which awakened this need in me to search. Prior to that weekend, my fears(rational or irrational)held me back from really experiencing anything. Well, I did experience things, but only in the "safe" manner in which I allowed myself to experience them. For the first time in a decade, I think I can safely say I'm finished taking the blame for something that wasn't my fault. I can't control or predict how someone is going to react to a particular situation, and I couldn't control it then. The choice that was made had nothing to do with me.
Wow. Sounds so painfully simple. Part of me wants to lament over the fact that had I only figured it out sooner....but you know what? I didn't. There's no set time line for things like this. I know it now, and that's all that matters.
All this searching is going to be a blast. Especially since I can finally embrace what I find.