(no subject)
So how is packing and looking for a place to live? It sucks ass!
My room is trashed from cleaning out my closet and having to seperate my stuff from my moms, and then having to go through everything to see what I need to keep and don't need to keep. On top of it, my depression is hitting me harder then ever. This weekend was the worse. Jon has been out of town for 2 weeks and won't be back till this Friday. Hopefully. We've gone 2 weeks of not seeing each other, but not 3 and the second was hard on me. Now a 3rd week? Seems to be getting harder. I'm tired of laying in bed by myself, with a pillow on each side of me. Making it feel like someone is in bed with me. Plus I'm going through this guilt thing, that when we move I'm not going to be able to work at the school anymore and I'm going to have to put in my 2 weeks.
Plus having to help take care of his son .. I don't mind. I honestly don't mind. But I don't want to be the one doing everything. Jon goes out of town for work and works nights, 13 14 hours and sleeps all day. I don't want to have to take on all the responsibilties with his son and him not do nothing.
This whole weekend I have been so down, yesterday I was sitting here checking e-mail and deleting junk. I just broke down in tears for no reason. I haven't done that in a very long time. I don't know why I'm feeling like this, I don't like it all.
My room is trashed from cleaning out my closet and having to seperate my stuff from my moms, and then having to go through everything to see what I need to keep and don't need to keep. On top of it, my depression is hitting me harder then ever. This weekend was the worse. Jon has been out of town for 2 weeks and won't be back till this Friday. Hopefully. We've gone 2 weeks of not seeing each other, but not 3 and the second was hard on me. Now a 3rd week? Seems to be getting harder. I'm tired of laying in bed by myself, with a pillow on each side of me. Making it feel like someone is in bed with me. Plus I'm going through this guilt thing, that when we move I'm not going to be able to work at the school anymore and I'm going to have to put in my 2 weeks.
Plus having to help take care of his son .. I don't mind. I honestly don't mind. But I don't want to be the one doing everything. Jon goes out of town for work and works nights, 13 14 hours and sleeps all day. I don't want to have to take on all the responsibilties with his son and him not do nothing.
This whole weekend I have been so down, yesterday I was sitting here checking e-mail and deleting junk. I just broke down in tears for no reason. I haven't done that in a very long time. I don't know why I'm feeling like this, I don't like it all.