Safe
Title: Safe
Dedicated To: <3 The one who keeps me safe, my J <3
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Author: Apache Firecat
Characters: Xander/Anya
Rating: PG/K+
Summary: It's okay for her to trust this human, Anya believes.
Word Count: 1171
Written For: FFFC June Amnesty: r22.08: (Easter) Bunny and r22.09: Unforeseen, 1 Million Words A to Z: M (Married Life)
Warnings: None
Disclaimer: All characters within belong to their rightful owners, not the author, and are used without permission.
Men, despite what they claim, are not able to keep a woman safe. Women should never rely on a man for anything. Anya has known this for what feels like her entire existence, even though there was a time when she had not. There had been a time when she had been young, foolish, and naiive. There had been a time when she had been just as foolish as all the other, truly young girls running through Sunnydale, all that prey so apt to fall easily for a Vampire or Demon. There had been a time when she, too, had thought that the sun rose and set in one single man, who had ended up destroying her heart, shattering her soul, and effectively making her embrace evil.
She still questions sometimes if what she did was truly evil, but she'll never tell her fiance or his friends that. She knows better. Demons are evil, pure and simple. Even the re-ensouled Spike is evil, no matter how many times he helps Buffy and her Scooby friends save the world. Anya's glad she's managed to pull Xander out of some of that. She wishes she could pull him away more. She wishes she could convince him to leave this Hellmouth, especially when it's so close to all the things she used to be and darkness she used to embrace, the darkness she knows that he will leave her for if she ever does embrace it again. She wishes they could go somewhere where it was just the two of them and live their lives.
But she knows any thought of actually making that happen, of actually sweeping him out of this Hellmouth town as long as those two, Buffy and Willow, are around, is just another daydream that will never come true. It's completely futile. Her man, little boy that he can be at times, is too wrapped up in them. She knows they're only friends -- she has nothing to fear of any chance of them taking her bethrothed --, but she also knows he'll never leave them. In a way, as annoying as that fact is, it's also one of the many reasons why she loves him.
Tomorrow is an awful day, Anya reflects, shuddering into Xander's bare shoulder. Even in his sleep, his strong arms, which are growing more muscular with every day he works in the construction business, wrap more tightly around her, as if to tell her, of their own accord, that he will protect her. She shouldn't be looking to a man for safety -- it goes against everything she's been taught to believe --, but she does. He is her happiness, the one reassuring aspect of her life that reminds her that she doesn't have to be evil to be strong and not be hurt. She doesn't have to worry about humans hurting her or, worse, the tiny, terrifying monsters that will be everywhere tomorrow.
They know what's coming tomorrow, Anya thinks again, yet they think it's all in fun. One day, these people will meet some of the creatures she has seen, some of the things that look fluffy and cute yet are so diabolical. They're so quick to tell her that wrecking vengeance for all those broken hearts was evil. They're still quick to accuse Spike of being evil, even though she's not seen him do anything actually bad in almost a year. Yet they raise up the truly wicked things. They give their children images of evil and tell them it's all cute fun in the form of a holiday, a holiday, Anya knows, comes from a Pagan fertility ceremony, something millions of these humans would never dare celebrate openly if they only understood it.
But they convince themselves that evil is good. They fall in love with Vampires, Witches, and Demons. They celebrate anger and violence. Truly, she's come across some humans who are more evil than several of the Demons she's encountered in the past. She thinks of Clem, and of Spike, and of herself, and then she considers the men whose hearts she stopped, whose souls she sent to where they belonged.
These people think they know evil, but they couldn't be more wrong. She'll find a way to protect her man, though, and make certain he doesn't indulge too much in all the horrors they lift up and celebrate. He may be determined to only be a construction worker in the Hellmouth and help his friends when he could do so very much more, but she'll watch over him. She'll protect him from true evil, from his friends, even from himself when he has to. She'll protect him, and he too, Anya knows, gazing adoringly up at his sleeping face, will protect her, or do his very best to do so.
He won't hurt her. He's too gentle a lamb, too good a man. Alexander Lavelle Harris truly does possess one of the kindest, most generous, and most loving souls she's ever been blessed to know. Blessed? The thought stops her in surprise, and she gives a slight, unconscious jerk. But yes, she is blessed to have him, to know him, to love him, -- she glances down at her ring that gleams in the late, silver moonlight slipping through their curtains -- to be becoming, in a few more months, Mrs. Alexander Lavelle Harris. She beams at the thought. Yes, she truly is blessed!
Xander will protect her. She can trust him, with her heart, her soul, her whole being. She kissed his cheek, her grin growing as his beard hairs tickle her mouth. She's glad he's letting his hair grow out a bit more, although she knows he'll cut it the moment someone says something about it. She sighs. She truly does wish he would listen to her more and them less.
But he does love her, and that's really all she needs in this horrific world. He loves her, and he will do all he can to protect her, even to the point of dying. He'll keep her safe, and he'll never hurt. He'll never leave her at the alter like she was left before. He'll always be here for her, until he no longer can be and dies of old age. She is loved, loved at long last. It's okay to trust this human, to feel reassured that this strong, honorable, and wonderful man will always protect her.
Anya snuggles back down into Xander's arms after giving him another kiss and closes her eyes at last. It doesn't matter what horrors will come tomorrow, or the next month, or next month, or even a dozen years from now. He will always protect her, even from the bunnies that will be hopping around wildly tomorrow on this bloody Easter holiday. Despite the terrors to come, the former Vengeance Demon falls asleep with a smile still lighting her beautiful, peaceful face, and in their sleep, the lovers hold each other close as they dream of the married life yet to come to them.
Dedicated To: <3 The one who keeps me safe, my J <3
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Author: Apache Firecat
Characters: Xander/Anya
Rating: PG/K+
Summary: It's okay for her to trust this human, Anya believes.
Word Count: 1171
Written For: FFFC June Amnesty: r22.08: (Easter) Bunny and r22.09: Unforeseen, 1 Million Words A to Z: M (Married Life)
Warnings: None
Disclaimer: All characters within belong to their rightful owners, not the author, and are used without permission.
Men, despite what they claim, are not able to keep a woman safe. Women should never rely on a man for anything. Anya has known this for what feels like her entire existence, even though there was a time when she had not. There had been a time when she had been young, foolish, and naiive. There had been a time when she had been just as foolish as all the other, truly young girls running through Sunnydale, all that prey so apt to fall easily for a Vampire or Demon. There had been a time when she, too, had thought that the sun rose and set in one single man, who had ended up destroying her heart, shattering her soul, and effectively making her embrace evil.
She still questions sometimes if what she did was truly evil, but she'll never tell her fiance or his friends that. She knows better. Demons are evil, pure and simple. Even the re-ensouled Spike is evil, no matter how many times he helps Buffy and her Scooby friends save the world. Anya's glad she's managed to pull Xander out of some of that. She wishes she could pull him away more. She wishes she could convince him to leave this Hellmouth, especially when it's so close to all the things she used to be and darkness she used to embrace, the darkness she knows that he will leave her for if she ever does embrace it again. She wishes they could go somewhere where it was just the two of them and live their lives.
But she knows any thought of actually making that happen, of actually sweeping him out of this Hellmouth town as long as those two, Buffy and Willow, are around, is just another daydream that will never come true. It's completely futile. Her man, little boy that he can be at times, is too wrapped up in them. She knows they're only friends -- she has nothing to fear of any chance of them taking her bethrothed --, but she also knows he'll never leave them. In a way, as annoying as that fact is, it's also one of the many reasons why she loves him.
Tomorrow is an awful day, Anya reflects, shuddering into Xander's bare shoulder. Even in his sleep, his strong arms, which are growing more muscular with every day he works in the construction business, wrap more tightly around her, as if to tell her, of their own accord, that he will protect her. She shouldn't be looking to a man for safety -- it goes against everything she's been taught to believe --, but she does. He is her happiness, the one reassuring aspect of her life that reminds her that she doesn't have to be evil to be strong and not be hurt. She doesn't have to worry about humans hurting her or, worse, the tiny, terrifying monsters that will be everywhere tomorrow.
They know what's coming tomorrow, Anya thinks again, yet they think it's all in fun. One day, these people will meet some of the creatures she has seen, some of the things that look fluffy and cute yet are so diabolical. They're so quick to tell her that wrecking vengeance for all those broken hearts was evil. They're still quick to accuse Spike of being evil, even though she's not seen him do anything actually bad in almost a year. Yet they raise up the truly wicked things. They give their children images of evil and tell them it's all cute fun in the form of a holiday, a holiday, Anya knows, comes from a Pagan fertility ceremony, something millions of these humans would never dare celebrate openly if they only understood it.
But they convince themselves that evil is good. They fall in love with Vampires, Witches, and Demons. They celebrate anger and violence. Truly, she's come across some humans who are more evil than several of the Demons she's encountered in the past. She thinks of Clem, and of Spike, and of herself, and then she considers the men whose hearts she stopped, whose souls she sent to where they belonged.
These people think they know evil, but they couldn't be more wrong. She'll find a way to protect her man, though, and make certain he doesn't indulge too much in all the horrors they lift up and celebrate. He may be determined to only be a construction worker in the Hellmouth and help his friends when he could do so very much more, but she'll watch over him. She'll protect him from true evil, from his friends, even from himself when he has to. She'll protect him, and he too, Anya knows, gazing adoringly up at his sleeping face, will protect her, or do his very best to do so.
He won't hurt her. He's too gentle a lamb, too good a man. Alexander Lavelle Harris truly does possess one of the kindest, most generous, and most loving souls she's ever been blessed to know. Blessed? The thought stops her in surprise, and she gives a slight, unconscious jerk. But yes, she is blessed to have him, to know him, to love him, -- she glances down at her ring that gleams in the late, silver moonlight slipping through their curtains -- to be becoming, in a few more months, Mrs. Alexander Lavelle Harris. She beams at the thought. Yes, she truly is blessed!
Xander will protect her. She can trust him, with her heart, her soul, her whole being. She kissed his cheek, her grin growing as his beard hairs tickle her mouth. She's glad he's letting his hair grow out a bit more, although she knows he'll cut it the moment someone says something about it. She sighs. She truly does wish he would listen to her more and them less.
But he does love her, and that's really all she needs in this horrific world. He loves her, and he will do all he can to protect her, even to the point of dying. He'll keep her safe, and he'll never hurt. He'll never leave her at the alter like she was left before. He'll always be here for her, until he no longer can be and dies of old age. She is loved, loved at long last. It's okay to trust this human, to feel reassured that this strong, honorable, and wonderful man will always protect her.
Anya snuggles back down into Xander's arms after giving him another kiss and closes her eyes at last. It doesn't matter what horrors will come tomorrow, or the next month, or next month, or even a dozen years from now. He will always protect her, even from the bunnies that will be hopping around wildly tomorrow on this bloody Easter holiday. Despite the terrors to come, the former Vengeance Demon falls asleep with a smile still lighting her beautiful, peaceful face, and in their sleep, the lovers hold each other close as they dream of the married life yet to come to them.