The Turning
Title: The Turning
Fandom: Smallville
Author: Apache Firecat
Characters: CLex (Clark/Lex), also mentioned Clark/Lois
Rating: PG/K+
Summary: He will do what he must to save the world.
Word Count: 2142
Written For: GenPrompt Bingo: Round 22: Powerful and Best Friends
Warnings: Dark Future Fic
Disclaimer: All characters within belong to their rightful owners, not the author, and are used without permission.
Even after all these years, he still likes to come out to the country sometimes. Not just any wide open area will do if he really wants to feel the old, familiar ease of the tension that rides him every day. It has to be these particular dirt roads, along these particular fields, in this particular small town or, rather, outside of it. It has to be Smallville, Kansas. He has driven out here countless times over the years from Metropolis, but he has also flown here on private jets and had his pilots leave him far out here in places where they certainly questioned not only his safety but his sanity as well.
But Lex Luthor stopped caring about what others thought of him many years ago. He has to maintain a certain public image of course. If he ever appears weak, his enemies -- and although he may not be a hero, he certainly has more than his fair share of them - will take advantage. They will use whatever weakness he exposes to topple his empire, and if his empire topples so, too, will go any chance he has of helping the world actually be saved.
The heroes are losing sight, Lex knows, watching the horses and cows move slowly around in the far pastures. They have been for years now. It’s not easy keeping one’s thoughts set only on saving the world, and sometimes, actually far too often, people are not willing to give whatever they must in order to save others. Even the best of heroes, those who dedicated their every waking moment to saving lives, get relayed in trying to live their own lives.
Clark, for example, rarely receives the help he needs these days, and growing up, he was far too proud to request the assistance he needed. He had almost been as proud as his father, and he had certainly spent a few too many years allowing his pride to rule his life, even if he would no more admit to that fact these days than he had then. His pride had not come in the same form as Jonathan’s, but it had certainly ruled him nonetheless. He had always yearned for acceptance, and it had been in his desperate desire to be accepted as he was that he had allowed society and its views, and especially his parents’ views, to sculpt the man he had become.
He was a superman, and not just because he was the world’s greatest hero. His powers did not make him who he was. His ethics did not make him who he was either, despite what the world thought. Lex’s lips twist in a wry smirk as he reflects over that same world of people who Clark is always so busy trying to appease. They do not know his secrets, not like Lex does. They do not know who he truly is. He isn’t just the hero in whom they all believe so fervently. Despite what the world thinks, Lex knows his true identity. He knows the real man beneath all the masks, not just the bright red and blue outfit. He knows his fears...
And he remembers, and still loves, the boy he was. That same boy who had been so terrified of surrendering to the feelings that had grown so passionately between them was still there, hidden very well underneath so many layers that are there only to appease the people with whom he surrounds himself: his rescuees, his fans whose praise make him feel better about himself no matter what sour decisions he has been forced to make over the years, his small but tight circle of friends whose love of him is so great they would actually accept him for who he is if only he would allow himself to be the man he truly is at heart, and yes, even that horrid Lois Lane he’s married.
The world loves Superman, but Clark’s world loves Clark. They love him for always being there for him over the years. They love him for always saving them, for always giving them whatever they need. Lex tisks in the back of his throat. He does not need love or admiration like that. Clark isn’t the only one to live his life pleasing others in order to be accepted, but there are other ways.
Lex’s fingers tense, his muscles flexing involuntarily. Power is the best way to gain the people’s acceptance, because then their true thoughts do not matter. Power is earned by wealth, not by doing good deeds, and he’s finally accumulated enough wealth and wisdom that he has almost all the power that Clark wields on a daily basis at his fingertips. He could take over the world if he truly wanted, but that is not what he wants.
He and Clark both lost a great deal in the meteor shower that hit this small, sleepy town so many years ago. He had kept his parents, but unlike Clark, he had never felt his father’s love or acceptance. He had always been at war with his father. His mother had actually loved him, or so he seemed to recall. Sometimes he wondered if the fuzzy, warm memories he had of Lillian Luthor had been a careful construct he had built in which to feel better about himself, to feel as though he had actually been loved for himself once in his life, but it didn’t really matter. Whether she had truly loved him or not, she had been taken from him far too early.
Similarly, he had felt the very real pain of knowing he would never be loved again far too early in his life. Only once had he doubted it. Only once had he believed that he might actually one day be loved by some one other than his mother and for something more than what he could do and the fortunes he wielded.
Once, in this very town, he had come to believe in miracles such as that. He had come to believe that he could be loved, that he was loved, and he had even been foolish enough to believe that their love could conquer anything. He and Clark had been the very best of friends, but the passionate bond between them had been far, far greater than friendship. He had never felt as warm, cared for, appreciated, or safe as Clark Kent had made him all those years ago, and none of that had had anything to do with Superman or his powers.
Indeed it had been in Clark’s determination to be a Superman to all that had led him to abandon Lex, to deny their love or whatever feelings he had had for Lex... Perhaps he had not truly loved him. Perhaps he had been too young to know what love was. But he had felt something. There had been no denying the kisses that they had shared in this field, up in the barn on the hill, in Lex’s mansion at the time, or in so many other places. Hidden away from society, they had each opened up to one another, and that friendship, the only true one Lex had ever known, had built into something far grander, far more passionate, and far more wonderful.
It had also scared them both to their very, nubile cores. Clark had chosen, ultimately, to deny all that he had felt while Lex had been hurt again. It had been the last time he had ever truly allowed anyone into his heart and thoughts, and only the second time since his mother had lived. He had had a plethora of lovers since then, both men and women and even a few other aliens along the way, but he would never again give his heart to anyone.
He cannot, in part, because it is in these very fields that Lex’s true love and happiness still lays. That is why he has to come here every so often. He has to remember who he is, who Clark is, and the real reason why he battles the world’s greatest hero. Clark is blinded. He’s too desperate to be loved by the populace to see what the world has truly become, and the only recourse left to save it from all those in power, including the heroes.
He’ll see him again today, Lex knows. He’ll fight him again today, and this time, someone may well die. They may both die. He smiles, though the smile does not touch his empty, blue eyes. It would be fittingly clandestine if they both die in today’s battle. But if he can win, he can save the world. He can stop the planet from the destruction with which humanity is set to conquer it. War is ravaging the land again, starving all species. There is only one answer left: He must conquer it. He must lead Earth into the bright, new future she deserves.
And Clark, the very man who first inspired him to do better, is still the man who stands in his way. He is still the man who is set to die trying to stop him. In the distance, Lex sees a proud, old gelding toss his head. He remembers that horse’s mother. He remembers many gallops taken together on her back, many kisses and other, greater things shared astride her.
He had once believed this simple farmland to be his future, but the future he’d truly wanted, of being loved by the only person who had ever loved him, has been stolen from him. Clark still looks at him with the same old, burning passion in his bright blue eyes sometimes when they’re alone, but that doesn’t matter. It can’t. The very boy who turned from him in the fear of what everyone else would think of their relationship is still the same, scared boy who set him on the path on which he now stands.
Lex had never cared about the world before Clark, but he’s never stopped since. He sees the destruction humanity is reaping, and he knows there is only one way left to save them. Worse, it’s something the other humans, especially the self-righteous heroes, will never be willing to do. He must conquer them all so he can save them.
The horse has come closer, and through the tears beginning to prick his eyes, Lex sees him again toss his mighty, regal head. Many years ago, when they’d still been young, Clark had reminded him of a wild, free, powerful, and beautiful stallion. He had tried so hard to tame that stallion. He’d been willing to give him everything and anything, and he had given him everything he’d held most dear. Clark Kent had changed his world, but his own pride had ultimately cost them everything.
Lex scoffs under his breath. The world thinks he is the prideful one, but he knows better. He and Clark could have found other, better ways to save the world, but now it’s too late. He reaches into the inside pocket of his jacket, removes a carrot, and holds it out to the horse. He waits as the proud animal slowly inches closer and finally eats from his palm. He strokes his muzzle before turning away, before turning from the pasture, the old barn, and the past.
He will do what he must today to save the planet. He will do what he must to ensure the wild can stay wild, the prideful proud,… and Clark’s daughter has a good world in which to grow up. He’s never stopped caring about Clark. He’s never stopped loving him. But everything has gone on for far too long now.
He will save the world. He will do whatever he must to stop all the wars and to make sure everyone can eat and thrive. He will free them from their own foolishery, bad decisions, and greed. He will save the earth, and he will stop whoever tries to stop him. He no longer has a choice. Lex walks away from the memories of love, his own head held high with the determined façade of the pride the world expects from the richest, and most powerful, man in it. He will stop whoever he must. He will kill whoever he must.
And so he says goodbye to the boy he ever was and embraces the man he must become, the man, in some ways, his father had always wanted him to be, the man the world’s supposed greatest hero had set him on the path to become. He might well kill that man today - he might well kill whatever’s left of both their hearts --, but he will succeed where Clark cannot. He will saved the world, to which he’s already surrendered all he ever was or hoped to be.
The End
Fandom: Smallville
Author: Apache Firecat
Characters: CLex (Clark/Lex), also mentioned Clark/Lois
Rating: PG/K+
Summary: He will do what he must to save the world.
Word Count: 2142
Written For: GenPrompt Bingo: Round 22: Powerful and Best Friends
Warnings: Dark Future Fic
Disclaimer: All characters within belong to their rightful owners, not the author, and are used without permission.
Even after all these years, he still likes to come out to the country sometimes. Not just any wide open area will do if he really wants to feel the old, familiar ease of the tension that rides him every day. It has to be these particular dirt roads, along these particular fields, in this particular small town or, rather, outside of it. It has to be Smallville, Kansas. He has driven out here countless times over the years from Metropolis, but he has also flown here on private jets and had his pilots leave him far out here in places where they certainly questioned not only his safety but his sanity as well.
But Lex Luthor stopped caring about what others thought of him many years ago. He has to maintain a certain public image of course. If he ever appears weak, his enemies -- and although he may not be a hero, he certainly has more than his fair share of them - will take advantage. They will use whatever weakness he exposes to topple his empire, and if his empire topples so, too, will go any chance he has of helping the world actually be saved.
The heroes are losing sight, Lex knows, watching the horses and cows move slowly around in the far pastures. They have been for years now. It’s not easy keeping one’s thoughts set only on saving the world, and sometimes, actually far too often, people are not willing to give whatever they must in order to save others. Even the best of heroes, those who dedicated their every waking moment to saving lives, get relayed in trying to live their own lives.
Clark, for example, rarely receives the help he needs these days, and growing up, he was far too proud to request the assistance he needed. He had almost been as proud as his father, and he had certainly spent a few too many years allowing his pride to rule his life, even if he would no more admit to that fact these days than he had then. His pride had not come in the same form as Jonathan’s, but it had certainly ruled him nonetheless. He had always yearned for acceptance, and it had been in his desperate desire to be accepted as he was that he had allowed society and its views, and especially his parents’ views, to sculpt the man he had become.
He was a superman, and not just because he was the world’s greatest hero. His powers did not make him who he was. His ethics did not make him who he was either, despite what the world thought. Lex’s lips twist in a wry smirk as he reflects over that same world of people who Clark is always so busy trying to appease. They do not know his secrets, not like Lex does. They do not know who he truly is. He isn’t just the hero in whom they all believe so fervently. Despite what the world thinks, Lex knows his true identity. He knows the real man beneath all the masks, not just the bright red and blue outfit. He knows his fears...
And he remembers, and still loves, the boy he was. That same boy who had been so terrified of surrendering to the feelings that had grown so passionately between them was still there, hidden very well underneath so many layers that are there only to appease the people with whom he surrounds himself: his rescuees, his fans whose praise make him feel better about himself no matter what sour decisions he has been forced to make over the years, his small but tight circle of friends whose love of him is so great they would actually accept him for who he is if only he would allow himself to be the man he truly is at heart, and yes, even that horrid Lois Lane he’s married.
The world loves Superman, but Clark’s world loves Clark. They love him for always being there for him over the years. They love him for always saving them, for always giving them whatever they need. Lex tisks in the back of his throat. He does not need love or admiration like that. Clark isn’t the only one to live his life pleasing others in order to be accepted, but there are other ways.
Lex’s fingers tense, his muscles flexing involuntarily. Power is the best way to gain the people’s acceptance, because then their true thoughts do not matter. Power is earned by wealth, not by doing good deeds, and he’s finally accumulated enough wealth and wisdom that he has almost all the power that Clark wields on a daily basis at his fingertips. He could take over the world if he truly wanted, but that is not what he wants.
He and Clark both lost a great deal in the meteor shower that hit this small, sleepy town so many years ago. He had kept his parents, but unlike Clark, he had never felt his father’s love or acceptance. He had always been at war with his father. His mother had actually loved him, or so he seemed to recall. Sometimes he wondered if the fuzzy, warm memories he had of Lillian Luthor had been a careful construct he had built in which to feel better about himself, to feel as though he had actually been loved for himself once in his life, but it didn’t really matter. Whether she had truly loved him or not, she had been taken from him far too early.
Similarly, he had felt the very real pain of knowing he would never be loved again far too early in his life. Only once had he doubted it. Only once had he believed that he might actually one day be loved by some one other than his mother and for something more than what he could do and the fortunes he wielded.
Once, in this very town, he had come to believe in miracles such as that. He had come to believe that he could be loved, that he was loved, and he had even been foolish enough to believe that their love could conquer anything. He and Clark had been the very best of friends, but the passionate bond between them had been far, far greater than friendship. He had never felt as warm, cared for, appreciated, or safe as Clark Kent had made him all those years ago, and none of that had had anything to do with Superman or his powers.
Indeed it had been in Clark’s determination to be a Superman to all that had led him to abandon Lex, to deny their love or whatever feelings he had had for Lex... Perhaps he had not truly loved him. Perhaps he had been too young to know what love was. But he had felt something. There had been no denying the kisses that they had shared in this field, up in the barn on the hill, in Lex’s mansion at the time, or in so many other places. Hidden away from society, they had each opened up to one another, and that friendship, the only true one Lex had ever known, had built into something far grander, far more passionate, and far more wonderful.
It had also scared them both to their very, nubile cores. Clark had chosen, ultimately, to deny all that he had felt while Lex had been hurt again. It had been the last time he had ever truly allowed anyone into his heart and thoughts, and only the second time since his mother had lived. He had had a plethora of lovers since then, both men and women and even a few other aliens along the way, but he would never again give his heart to anyone.
He cannot, in part, because it is in these very fields that Lex’s true love and happiness still lays. That is why he has to come here every so often. He has to remember who he is, who Clark is, and the real reason why he battles the world’s greatest hero. Clark is blinded. He’s too desperate to be loved by the populace to see what the world has truly become, and the only recourse left to save it from all those in power, including the heroes.
He’ll see him again today, Lex knows. He’ll fight him again today, and this time, someone may well die. They may both die. He smiles, though the smile does not touch his empty, blue eyes. It would be fittingly clandestine if they both die in today’s battle. But if he can win, he can save the world. He can stop the planet from the destruction with which humanity is set to conquer it. War is ravaging the land again, starving all species. There is only one answer left: He must conquer it. He must lead Earth into the bright, new future she deserves.
And Clark, the very man who first inspired him to do better, is still the man who stands in his way. He is still the man who is set to die trying to stop him. In the distance, Lex sees a proud, old gelding toss his head. He remembers that horse’s mother. He remembers many gallops taken together on her back, many kisses and other, greater things shared astride her.
He had once believed this simple farmland to be his future, but the future he’d truly wanted, of being loved by the only person who had ever loved him, has been stolen from him. Clark still looks at him with the same old, burning passion in his bright blue eyes sometimes when they’re alone, but that doesn’t matter. It can’t. The very boy who turned from him in the fear of what everyone else would think of their relationship is still the same, scared boy who set him on the path on which he now stands.
Lex had never cared about the world before Clark, but he’s never stopped since. He sees the destruction humanity is reaping, and he knows there is only one way left to save them. Worse, it’s something the other humans, especially the self-righteous heroes, will never be willing to do. He must conquer them all so he can save them.
The horse has come closer, and through the tears beginning to prick his eyes, Lex sees him again toss his mighty, regal head. Many years ago, when they’d still been young, Clark had reminded him of a wild, free, powerful, and beautiful stallion. He had tried so hard to tame that stallion. He’d been willing to give him everything and anything, and he had given him everything he’d held most dear. Clark Kent had changed his world, but his own pride had ultimately cost them everything.
Lex scoffs under his breath. The world thinks he is the prideful one, but he knows better. He and Clark could have found other, better ways to save the world, but now it’s too late. He reaches into the inside pocket of his jacket, removes a carrot, and holds it out to the horse. He waits as the proud animal slowly inches closer and finally eats from his palm. He strokes his muzzle before turning away, before turning from the pasture, the old barn, and the past.
He will do what he must today to save the planet. He will do what he must to ensure the wild can stay wild, the prideful proud,… and Clark’s daughter has a good world in which to grow up. He’s never stopped caring about Clark. He’s never stopped loving him. But everything has gone on for far too long now.
He will save the world. He will do whatever he must to stop all the wars and to make sure everyone can eat and thrive. He will free them from their own foolishery, bad decisions, and greed. He will save the earth, and he will stop whoever tries to stop him. He no longer has a choice. Lex walks away from the memories of love, his own head held high with the determined façade of the pride the world expects from the richest, and most powerful, man in it. He will stop whoever he must. He will kill whoever he must.
And so he says goodbye to the boy he ever was and embraces the man he must become, the man, in some ways, his father had always wanted him to be, the man the world’s supposed greatest hero had set him on the path to become. He might well kill that man today - he might well kill whatever’s left of both their hearts --, but he will succeed where Clark cannot. He will saved the world, to which he’s already surrendered all he ever was or hoped to be.
The End