(no subject)
Can friendship die of old age?
Perhaps it's because of my upbringing - I attended more than 10 different schools from pre-school through HS graduation - but I'm horrible at long-distance relationships. Many times I've made friends at a new school, only to say goodbye to them the next year. I guess it was a form of self-preservation that I didn't cling too tightly to the people I would inevitably leave behind. But the thing is, I never stop considering those people friends. Every person that was important or significant to me, from Remi (my "boyfriend" in pre-school) and Roberta (the girl in 3rd grade who was alternately friend and enemy), to Katie in middle school (the first person I kept in contact with after moving), and Wes, Zach, Windle, Sharon, and the dozen or so people I touched in college, ALL of them are still "my friends."
But maybe they don't see it that way.
I'll be the first to admit that I have poor social skills. Sometimes I'm too subtle, mostly I'm very blunt, and I don't always know how to read a person's reactions. So when I try to curry a response from someone, and am often met with a response of, "that day's not good." When I realize that I'm the only one making advances of "let's be social together," am I not getting the hint? Is the person just not interested in me anymore, and I'm being too dense to notice? Or am I being paranoid and insecure and jumping to conclusions?
Current mood:
melancholy
Perhaps it's because of my upbringing - I attended more than 10 different schools from pre-school through HS graduation - but I'm horrible at long-distance relationships. Many times I've made friends at a new school, only to say goodbye to them the next year. I guess it was a form of self-preservation that I didn't cling too tightly to the people I would inevitably leave behind. But the thing is, I never stop considering those people friends. Every person that was important or significant to me, from Remi (my "boyfriend" in pre-school) and Roberta (the girl in 3rd grade who was alternately friend and enemy), to Katie in middle school (the first person I kept in contact with after moving), and Wes, Zach, Windle, Sharon, and the dozen or so people I touched in college, ALL of them are still "my friends."
But maybe they don't see it that way.
I'll be the first to admit that I have poor social skills. Sometimes I'm too subtle, mostly I'm very blunt, and I don't always know how to read a person's reactions. So when I try to curry a response from someone, and am often met with a response of, "that day's not good." When I realize that I'm the only one making advances of "let's be social together," am I not getting the hint? Is the person just not interested in me anymore, and I'm being too dense to notice? Or am I being paranoid and insecure and jumping to conclusions?
Current mood:
melancholy