Hnnnn
We finally resorted to ordering an absurdly expensive automatic timed cat feeder thingy. It got here pretty fast, and we set it up last night.
The assembly wasn't too awful. Both girls helped by circling, sniffing our hair, stretching out across any unguarded pieces of paper, watching just out of "Move!" *shove* range, and then wrasslin' a few feet away.
We set it up in an out-of-the-way corner of the dining room. There's nothing there but the pile of Goodwill stuff that's been sitting there for like a year now, and a non-working floor lamp we don't need anyway because the light in there is always adequate, or woefully inadequate, with no middle ground whatsoever; that was also the home of our only remaining power outlets.
MAYU: THIS BEARS FURTHER INVESTIGATION *sniffs the hell out of the plastic bowl*
MAKA: EH. COULD USE MORE FOOD
Me: Stand back, girls. (Because they speak English.) *plugs in power thingy*
Feeder: *WHIRRRRRRRR of hopper as it practices turning and dispenses pretend food into the bowl*
MAYU: OH HALE NO *retreats three or four miles*
MAKA: COOOOOOOOOOL NOW WHAT
Me: *brings out sack of remaining food in preparation to load feeder* Now, cats, by which I mean Maka, we just fed you your dinner. *sets bag down on floor* Don't freak ou--
MAKA: (O_O) I ACCEPT *zips over and tries to gnaw on bag*
Me: NO, dammit! Look! *wrenches top off feeder thing* Huh. I don't see what's supposed to stop it from going everywhere. Ah, well. *pours!*
Food: *goes EVERYWHERE--into the bowl, out the sides, onto the carpet*
Me: Crap.
MAYU: WHAT THE DEVIL
MAKA: *MADELEINE KHAN IMPRESSION*
MAYU: THIS MAKES NO SENSE. WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD SUCH A THING POSSIBLY--
MAKA: *DAFFY DUCK IMPRESSION*
So, it's gone exactly as predicted: when we turned the thing on, the noise startled Maka, but she was far more interested in scarfing food as fast as her jaws could move (I think she thought the food was there by accident, and was thus going to get taken away, better eat it all nownownow); Mayu is fairly certain we've imported a slice of Hell into her home.
We programmed it to go off four times a day, every six hours. Portion control's a little tricky, especially when one cat refuses to go near the thing yet. At 4:30 this morning, it went off on its own with no one around, just as intended; we want the cats to stop associating us with food, so Maka will quit waking us up so goddamn much. Mayu is proving more problematic, because when she heard the dispenser start up, she froze in full-on battle mode: back arched, ears back, tail puffed to maximum.
I thought it was funny until I went back out five solid minutes later and found her still in that position. Not only that, Maka had taken up a Mayu-pouncing stance from down the hall, seen her remain motionless and freaked-out, and was now in full-on panic mode, too, because Mayu clearly knew something she didn't, and it was something fucking terrifying.
Hunger is starting to win out, though. We put Maka on the porch, ran a new dispense cycle in front of Mayu, and coaxed her to within a foot or so of the bowl. I had to scoop out kibble and leave it in a trail for her to munch on; she now is willing to sniff it, just a little, with all her weight on her back legs JUST IN CASE IT TRIES TO GRAB HER
Blehhhhhh need sleep
The assembly wasn't too awful. Both girls helped by circling, sniffing our hair, stretching out across any unguarded pieces of paper, watching just out of "Move!" *shove* range, and then wrasslin' a few feet away.
We set it up in an out-of-the-way corner of the dining room. There's nothing there but the pile of Goodwill stuff that's been sitting there for like a year now, and a non-working floor lamp we don't need anyway because the light in there is always adequate, or woefully inadequate, with no middle ground whatsoever; that was also the home of our only remaining power outlets.
MAYU: THIS BEARS FURTHER INVESTIGATION *sniffs the hell out of the plastic bowl*
MAKA: EH. COULD USE MORE FOOD
Me: Stand back, girls. (Because they speak English.) *plugs in power thingy*
Feeder: *WHIRRRRRRRR of hopper as it practices turning and dispenses pretend food into the bowl*
MAYU: OH HALE NO *retreats three or four miles*
MAKA: COOOOOOOOOOL NOW WHAT
Me: *brings out sack of remaining food in preparation to load feeder* Now, cats, by which I mean Maka, we just fed you your dinner. *sets bag down on floor* Don't freak ou--
MAKA: (O_O) I ACCEPT *zips over and tries to gnaw on bag*
Me: NO, dammit! Look! *wrenches top off feeder thing* Huh. I don't see what's supposed to stop it from going everywhere. Ah, well. *pours!*
Food: *goes EVERYWHERE--into the bowl, out the sides, onto the carpet*
Me: Crap.
MAYU: WHAT THE DEVIL
MAKA: *MADELEINE KHAN IMPRESSION*
MAYU: THIS MAKES NO SENSE. WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD SUCH A THING POSSIBLY--
MAKA: *DAFFY DUCK IMPRESSION*
So, it's gone exactly as predicted: when we turned the thing on, the noise startled Maka, but she was far more interested in scarfing food as fast as her jaws could move (I think she thought the food was there by accident, and was thus going to get taken away, better eat it all nownownow); Mayu is fairly certain we've imported a slice of Hell into her home.
We programmed it to go off four times a day, every six hours. Portion control's a little tricky, especially when one cat refuses to go near the thing yet. At 4:30 this morning, it went off on its own with no one around, just as intended; we want the cats to stop associating us with food, so Maka will quit waking us up so goddamn much. Mayu is proving more problematic, because when she heard the dispenser start up, she froze in full-on battle mode: back arched, ears back, tail puffed to maximum.
I thought it was funny until I went back out five solid minutes later and found her still in that position. Not only that, Maka had taken up a Mayu-pouncing stance from down the hall, seen her remain motionless and freaked-out, and was now in full-on panic mode, too, because Mayu clearly knew something she didn't, and it was something fucking terrifying.
Hunger is starting to win out, though. We put Maka on the porch, ran a new dispense cycle in front of Mayu, and coaxed her to within a foot or so of the bowl. I had to scoop out kibble and leave it in a trail for her to munch on; she now is willing to sniff it, just a little, with all her weight on her back legs JUST IN CASE IT TRIES TO GRAB HER
Blehhhhhh need sleep