Fic: Best Birthday Ever
Title: The Best Birthday Ever
Rating: PG-13 (for some smutty words)
Fandom: Stargate Atlantis
Pairing: McShep, of course
Spoilers: None that I can think of
Word count: ~2400
Summary: It's not John's birthday, but Rodney might just have made it the most special day of his life.
In honor of my own birthday tomorrow, I've finally finished this thing that's been knocking about on my machine for a while. I hope you enjoy it.
*~~*
It was perfect, unbelievably perfect, even if he said so himself. The final test, and yes of course he'd had to conduct it himself, thank you very much Radek, was as complete a success as he'd expected. He stood back and admired it, unfeasibly proud of what he'd achieved. Well, what a whole team of people had achieved in reality, but he was the one who had driven them. He'd dreamed it, imagined it, designed it, made it real.
Now he had to go and find the man he'd done it all for. Or better still, send someone else to find him because he knew he wasn't going to be able to keep the stupid grin off his face long enough for it to be a surprise.
*~~*
John was in his office chatting to Lorne about football, under the pretext of helping his XO with requisitions, when Ronon stuck his head round the door. He flashed a toothy grin at Lorne by way of greeting, and leaned against the door frame. “McKay wants you.”
“And he couldn't use the radio?” John questioned, not moving his feet off his desk.
“He said he needed you today and he didn't have time to come and find you when you got lost.”
“Where the hell is he?” John sighed, dropping his feet to the floor before the real insult hit. “Also, hey!”
Lorne snorted but wisely kept his mouth shut because John might have been forced to point out the time he'd gotten turned around in the forests of Rixx and had to rely on Parrish and a native kid dressed as a fluffy bee to rescue him. Ronon grinned at him, the kind of grin that said 'I am totally not going to say anything but you know that I know you're directionally challenged.'
“He's over in a lab he's set up in that stubby tower you can see from the mess balcony,” the Satedan rumbled, slouching into a comfier pose to let the men in the room know he wasn't going anywhere until John followed him.
“I think we're about wrapped up here anyway, sir,” Lorne added, barely keeping the amusement out of his voice. “You better go and make sure he's not going to blow us out of the water.”
“He probably just wants me to turn something on,” John sighed, standing up and edging round his desk towards the door.
“I'm sure that's what it is, sir,” Lorne said, something knowing lurking just behind the amusement.
John stared hard at him, getting back nothing but blank innocence, before turning and following his team mate out of the door. He shouted 'use the office if you like' over his shoulder, knowing full well that Lorne would already be sitting in the chair he'd just vacated. Lorne was John's kind of XO.
“So, what does he want?” he asked, following Ronon to the nearest transporter.
“Not sure,” the big man grunted, pressing the location on the screen.
They stepped out of the transporter and Ronon turned left and led him down a corridor that seemed to run straight along until it turned right at the end. There weren't even any doors coming of it. John was kind of insulted McKay had sent Ronon to get him. And that Ronon had thought it was the kind of order he had to follow. “You know, I think I could have made this without the guide.”
“Maybe,” Ronon grunted, with just a flicker of something that made John suddenly doubt the situation.
“What were you doing down here with him any way?” he asked, not sure whether he should carry on down the corridor or turn round and head back to the relative safety of his office. He knew though that if Ronon and McKay were up to something he either needed to stop it before anyone got hurt or to join in because it was going to be a heap of fun.
“Helping,” Ronon answered at his annoyingly literal best, directing John to a door that had opened to his right. John raised an eyebrow but knew he wasn't going to get any more out of his friend. And then it didn't matter because he'd stopped, gaping in shock at what was in the room.
There, hanging in the center of the vast space, lit by a single spot light, was a bat suit!
John stood there blinking, vaguely aware that Ronon had not followed him into the room and that the door had slid shut behind him. He couldn't make his mind do anything other than chant 'bat suit, bat suit, bat suit,' on an endless loop.
“It's fully functional,” McKay said, stepping out of the shadows and standing next to John to admire the suit.
“Nnggh,”John replied, because...bat suit, bat suit, bat suit.
“Now see, I just lost the bet,” Rodney whined, turning to face John. “Although, that can't count as an actual word, can it? So if you were to say 'cool' next, I could still win.”
“Cool,” John obliged, voice little more than a croak.
“Excellent,” Rodney said, beaming at him, before turning back to the suit. “Now, lets run through the functions before you try it on.”
“Where did you find it?” John asked, finally getting his brain in gear.
“Find it?” Rodney squawked, outraged. “You think the Ancients made something like this?”
“You built it?” asked John stupidly, because this whole day was just getting weirder and better.
“Yes, I built it,” McKay affirmed proudly, before catching himself. “Well, I built most of it. Radek's done quite a bit, and Simpson and Kusanagi did some work on the propulsion system. Even those lunatics in chemistry got involved with some of the weapons.”
“Weapons?”
“Did you fall on your head?” Rodney asked, sounding almost genuinely worried. “Of course it has weapons. I wouldn't send you out in a glorified leotard with just an unfashionable belt between you and the bad guys. Even you should recognize the Batman Beyond suit, even if it's inexplicably your least favorite of the franchise.”
“I think Terry's annoying,” John said, his mouth supplying the standard answer even though his brain was still mostly offline.
Rodney huffed out a laugh, his little gentle laugh that only John got to hear. “Strangely, I think he reminds me a little of someone I know.”
John wondered if he had banged his head and this whole thing was a some elaborate hallucination. There was no way he could really be standing in some dimly lit approximation of an Ancient bat cave with McKay, who was acting for all the world like a really grumpy Q. He had to be lying in a heap somewhere, slowly losing his mind to a raging concussion.
“This is a really weird cheese dream, isn't it?” John finally said, because it didn't seem to matter if he made a complete fool of himself in the privacy of his own head. “I've fallen asleep listening to Lorne extolling the virtues of IntelliTrack, haven't I? The man loves bar codes.”
“No, Colonel,” Rodney sighed, exasperated and fond, but a little put out. “You're wide awake and just as baffling as usual. I thought you'd like this.”
“I do,” John assured him quickly. “I really do, but I just can't believe it. You built a bat suit, Rodney.”
“I built you a bat suit,” Rodney pointed out, blushing a little before he covered it with bluster. “Now, if you don't want to try it out I'm sure there's a few other people in the city it'll fit and who want it.”
No,” squeaked John, because there was no way he was giving up the suit, even if it was all a dream. “I want it. I'm just...I can't...thank you.”
“Yes, yes,” McKay said, waving his hand like he built bat suits everyday. “That's enough of the mushy feelings stuff. Get your clothes off and get in the suit.”
John grinned. His scientist was the best, the best ever. There was no way that Carter had ever made O'Neill something like this and he was going to make damn sure the General found out about it, even if it made him look like a smug bastard.
He stripped out of all of his clothes, except his boxers, right where he stood, almost forgetting Rodney was there until he realized he could feel the heat coming off Rodney's body. McKay blinked at him, cleared his throat, licked his lips and strode forward to the suit, thankfully not drawing attention to the fact that John was a freak. Lack of impulse control, Sheppard, it's going to get you in trouble one day.
Rodney lifted the suit of its stand with almost reverent care, opening the back fastening and handing it to John. He took it, surprised by the weight of it for a moment, before he remembered it was a fully functioning bat suit that his best friend had built him.
“Come on,” McKay ordered, impatient as ever. “You'd think that you got bat suits on all your other birthdays.”
“It's not my birthday,” John pointed out, finally getting his brain in gear and pushing his feet into the legs. It was like a wet suit in weight, but thinner with the feel of oiled silk.
“It was when I had the idea,” explained Rodney, reaching out as though he was going to help John before drawing his hand back without doing anything. “And we decided to not wait until your next one because, well, we...I wanted to make sure you...you know...got this.”
John froze as he tried to adjust his boxers where they had ridden up when he pulled the suit over his hips, which was something to think of next time. He didn't know how to answer Rodney. It wasn't something they talked about, not in normal, non-sarcastic conversation, and just because he now had a super hero costume, it didn't make it any easier.
“It's taken you six months to make it?” he asked, taking the coward's way out.
“I'm sorry, I got distracted fighting the Wraith,” Rodney sniped back, happily joining the cowardice train. “Next time I build you something in my limited spare time I'll be sure to forget about eating or spending any time with my friends.”
“Hey,” John interrupted what he was sure was a long rant, going back to pulling on the suit. “I'm surprised it didn't take longer. And that you guys managed to keep it from me.”
“Well,” Rodney began, looking like he couldn't decide if he should look sheepish or smug. “We had a lot of people willing to help with the surprise.”
“Lorne,” John guessed, finally placing the expression on his XO's face. “I knew he was up to something, I just never imagined this.”
“What else did you think he was hiding?” McKay asked, looking genuinely baffled and John almost told him how he'd thought his far too perceptive XO had worked out his feelings for the scientist ran somewhat deeper than friendship.
“I don't know,” John said instead, being deliberately obtuse. “He was hiding it.”
“Oh, hardy ha,” Rodney said, rolling his eyes before seeming to remember what they were supposed to be doing. “Come on, I don't have all day.”
“Really?” John asked, pulling the suit up over his chest. “You actually plan to go back to the lab instead of playing with me.”
McKay blinked at him and John felt his face burn when he realized what he'd said. Clearly the most frightening of the weapons Rodney had added to the suit was the ability to make John forget there were things he shouldn't say, shouldn't even think. John shrugged his shoulders into the suit and turned round mostly so Rodney could fasten him in, but also so he could try to compose himself.
“Right,” the scientist said, sounding a little like he needed to get his thoughts in order too. John guessed that wasn't really a surprise because he was probably wondering what stupid thing the man he'd spent months building this amazing thing for was going to say next.
And then Rodney's hands were on him, pulling the suit together, easing the fabric across the width of his shoulders and closing the back seam. John was going to have to look at how the fastening worked later when he had time, and wasn't completely lost in the feel of those beautiful, capable hands on him.
McKay smoothed the suit down over his back and John had to fight to keep the moan behind his teeth. He looked down at himself, trying to tell in the dim light if the outline of his hardening cock was as obvious as he thought it was going to be in a skin tight suit. Jesus, he wasn't going to be able to turn round if Rodney kept touching him.
“Hmmm,” Rodney said, making the worry about turning round redundant by circling round John to check out the front of the suit. “It looks like it fits.”
John tried to keep his eyes up and his face under control, hoping that maybe McKay wouldn't notice, or at least wouldn't comment on, the erection that the suit was doing nothing to hide. He'd thought maybe he'd gotten away with it until Rodney took a small step to the side to look at the fit over his hips and spotted the bulge at the front.
“Oh,” McKay said surprised, and John readied himself to dissemble or flee or something that involved not talking at all before Rodney spoke again. “Oh.”
And then suddenly Rodney's mouth and hands were on him and nothing else mattered. Later he'd have to figure out how McKay knew, how he was so sure it was him and not the super cool suit that caused the hard-on. After all, he regularly accused John of getting hard over the jumpers. Right now he just lost himself in the thrill of having things he'd never even dreamed of, at least not at the same time, actually happen.
He was Batman. And he had his Boy Wonder...not that he was ever going to say that out loud.