Update on My Life

[anya_c_jenkins]

I haven't done one of these in a bit. I've been busy. College is not easy, people. Juggle it with owning a store and you get a sensation of time flying by at the speed of light. Does it actually do that anywhere do you think

Comments

[coryraines]

Anya... can you do me a favor... if you are still talking to me.

[anya_c_jenkins]

Cory?

I thought you got your head chopped off or something. What with the abrupt cessation in communications.

Obviously I'm still talking to you, if...miffed.

What do you want me to do? I'm not agreeing to anything until I know what it is.

[coryraines]

Nice to know some people are. *sighs*

I'm... leaving town. I don't know for how long. I got my financial matters taken care of but... I have a problem. It's my car. Can you... take it to a friend of mine? Her name is Amanda Montrose. She will know what to do with it.

I'd ask you to take care of it but... It might be a long while before I come back. I don't know.

[anya_c_jenkins]

I don't do the silent treatment well. I have things to say.

I guess I can take it to Amanda. I know who she is. Or I can take care of it. Not like I'm going anywhere anytime soon. Either way.

Why are you leaving?

[coryraines]

I was told never try to silence a woman when she has something to say. Just shut up and listen, let her speak. Least you want to be hurt. *shrugs*

It's up to you. Its a 1920's Packard. Pretty much the only thing I will be owning now.

Leaving... for personal reasons. Because... love hurts. Because I can't give what is deserved or wanted. Because in the end I will be hurting someone I care about no matter how much they tell me it doesn't matter.

[anya_c_jenkins]

*silent for a minute the frowns, hurt*

You disappeared. I thought we were friends and you just went away. Did I do something wrong?

Does it drive? And could I drive it? Because the bus is tiresome and it's too cold for the bike.

Oh. Love does hurt. I'm the last person you need to tell that. I guess, if you can't be the person...

Men suck.

ooc: *g* she'll get over it. I promise. She's a grumpy girl right now is all. Possibly because I made her talk about Hell.

[coryraines]

Sorry about that. I didn't mean to. We are friends. You didn't do anything wrong. It was me, I guess. I let my relationship get in the way of my others, my friendships. You weren't the only one I disappeared on. *frowns*

Sure, you can drive it. The guy who fixes it, if it breaks down, the card is in the glove box. So is everything else. I'll notify the right people to let them know you will be taking care of it and driving it.

Yeah... we do suck. I let you down and I'm sorry.

[anya_c_jenkins]

*shrugs* Men do that. They just disappear. Sex is always prioritized over friendship.

Driving it would be good. I hate the bus, but tuition's high and it's not good money management to buy a car right now.

*another shrug* Apology accepted. I don't suppose I should have expected anything else.

[coryraines]

There were... other reasons. Not the sex.

I'll leave you enough money to fill the car with some gas. It's the least I can do if you are going to take care of her.

If you will let me... can I call you now and then? Maybe doing so will keep me from falling.

[anya_c_jenkins]

Oh. But not me? I didn't...screw up again? I screw up. I get things wrong and then people leave.

Okay. Does she have heat? I don't know if cars did then. That's the most important thing. I don't like the cold.

...Of course. Falling how?

[coryraines]

It wasn't you at all. It was... *sighs* She was jealous of you. When she saw us dancing together or talking she got... she pushed me way saying I would have more fun with you. You were better for me than she was. She... didn't hear what I was saying to her.

The Packard does have heat. I had it put in. It has AC too. *smiles a bit* Hey, I understand about the cold. I usually spend winter in the south with the birds.

*smile fades* I'm... broken, Anya. I'm tumbling to where I once started many years ago.

[anya_c_jenkins]

Oh. I'm sorry, Cory. I didn't mean to cause trouble for you... I mean, I'm not that girl. Last girl ever to try and take someone away. My whole former calling was punishing people for that.

Good. I'll drive it then, for you. I just...cold is bad. Very, very bad. But I had...this is where my friends were. And in June it wasn't that cold. I should have realized, but I didn't.

*frowns* Oh. Broken's not good. You have to find something to glue the pieces back together. Because going back to where you were...who you were...it's rarely good.

[coryraines]

*looks down* It wasn't you. You were not the cause of all of it. She was just... I don't know the right words for it. I could tell her a million times we were just friends and she wouldn't hear me. I wasn't the one she wanted to listen to.

*hitches shoulder a little* Its not so bad. Where I'm going it might be colder. I don't know.

There is no glue to hold back together what was broken in me. I guess I'll be okay in a few centuries. Maybe this will be good. I can always rediscover myself.

[anya_c_jenkins]

Who did she want to listen to, if not you? Seems to me you're the only one who could tell her what was between us wasn't a threat to her. I don't even know her.

Don't. Don't go anywhere colder. It won't be fun.

*slight smile*

There's always glue. And few things should take centuries to repair. Somethings, maybe. But very few.

Rediscovering and reinventing are always positive, though.

[coryraines]

*sighs* Long story.

I don't want fun right now. I want hurt. I want to die a million deaths.

For me it will. But I've got the time. All I have is time.

Did you punish people like me? Who hurt other people?

[anya_c_jenkins]

*eyes him*

You're being melodramatic. And feeling guilty. It will pass. It always does.

You have more than time. You have friends. People who care about you, even if you did something wrong.

Yes. Men who hurt women. I hurt them. It's who I was.