Damnation, we got a realization
I've boiled down one of my major, major problems into a nice, quaint bite-size chunk that most people will be able to understand... so here we go.
Part 1: The situation that I am in is like what happens when you'd break up with your ex but still really like them. So, that problem is fixed when you avoid seeing that person and essentially destroy all references pertaining to that person until one is ready to move on. However, in my scenario, if I completely removed said person from my life, I'd fuck up that friendship I'd like to keep. If I do keep up the friendship, however, then I get to partake in more mental anguish that will suck balls.
Part 2: Yes, I've got deal with this on my own. I'm aware of that part. However, this whole thing could be a hell-of-a-lot easier on me if, ya know... how to phrase this exactly... if people got off of their asses and changed their lives for Christsakes. Yes, ream my ass for possibly being hypocritical. I'm aware of my problem and I'm attempting to fix it... I'm just bitching about how hard this is. I'm not going to name names, however...
1) Essentially fondling someone in public, and letting themselves be fondled... essentially taking the term 'PDA' to new levels is completely unacceptable. Same applies to private rooms. There is a difference between scratching someone's back or giving them a massage in public versus dry humping them with their clothes on. Not only is it FUCKING DISGUSTING BEYOND BELIEF, BUT IT ALSO SHOWS A LACK OF CONSIDERATION FOR OTHERS. If you want private time with someone, fine. So have it. Just don't enact your private desires in public... in-front of other people who don't want to see it.
2) Stop pitying people. You know what? Be there to encourage them. Be there to help them. Don't be there to help feed their misery, which in turn only prevents them from helping themselves.
I've said this before to people, and I'm going to save it again. My parents family disowned me in high-school because I hated their guts. They hated me similarly. It got to the point to where my family refused to acknowledge my existance at family events, talking to friends, etc. I ceased to exist. THEY PUT UP WITH MY SHIT UP TO A POINT. What I did to bring that point on, I don't know. When they told me that they only kept me in the house because it was their legal, not moral obligation to do so, I knew I hit rock-bottom. I got better, and I'm on speaking terms with my family and that they talk about all of us children know at family events, etc. They just make notice that I was the most interesting and difficult child they had. Which, of course, is the truth.
How does this pertain to this whole scenario? I don't know, but it seems like there is a whole lot of bitchy "I can't help myself" attitude going on, in a good majoirty of my friends unfortunately. It festers. It stagnates, like apathy. Yes, if you are doing stuff and taking small steps, so be it. I appreciate that. Just don't feed others and encourage them that it is O.K. to be miserable, or do self-checks to see whether or not you are really helping them... because you could be doing more harm then good.
3) What is the true definition of a friend? I really don't know, however I will point this out: What some people are expecting me to do right now is shitty, beyond shitty. Whether or not they are aware of my situation, I don't know. I do know if I don't talk to them face-to-face in the next couple days, they'll get pissed or be like "OMG WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME THIS EARLIER" type deal. Basically, it comes down to respect. I don't think I'm getting any; I'm told I have it, I just don't see any of it.
It comes in different ways from different people, I don't know. i'm going to bed.
Part 1: The situation that I am in is like what happens when you'd break up with your ex but still really like them. So, that problem is fixed when you avoid seeing that person and essentially destroy all references pertaining to that person until one is ready to move on. However, in my scenario, if I completely removed said person from my life, I'd fuck up that friendship I'd like to keep. If I do keep up the friendship, however, then I get to partake in more mental anguish that will suck balls.
Part 2: Yes, I've got deal with this on my own. I'm aware of that part. However, this whole thing could be a hell-of-a-lot easier on me if, ya know... how to phrase this exactly... if people got off of their asses and changed their lives for Christsakes. Yes, ream my ass for possibly being hypocritical. I'm aware of my problem and I'm attempting to fix it... I'm just bitching about how hard this is. I'm not going to name names, however...
1) Essentially fondling someone in public, and letting themselves be fondled... essentially taking the term 'PDA' to new levels is completely unacceptable. Same applies to private rooms. There is a difference between scratching someone's back or giving them a massage in public versus dry humping them with their clothes on. Not only is it FUCKING DISGUSTING BEYOND BELIEF, BUT IT ALSO SHOWS A LACK OF CONSIDERATION FOR OTHERS. If you want private time with someone, fine. So have it. Just don't enact your private desires in public... in-front of other people who don't want to see it.
2) Stop pitying people. You know what? Be there to encourage them. Be there to help them. Don't be there to help feed their misery, which in turn only prevents them from helping themselves.
I've said this before to people, and I'm going to save it again. My parents family disowned me in high-school because I hated their guts. They hated me similarly. It got to the point to where my family refused to acknowledge my existance at family events, talking to friends, etc. I ceased to exist. THEY PUT UP WITH MY SHIT UP TO A POINT. What I did to bring that point on, I don't know. When they told me that they only kept me in the house because it was their legal, not moral obligation to do so, I knew I hit rock-bottom. I got better, and I'm on speaking terms with my family and that they talk about all of us children know at family events, etc. They just make notice that I was the most interesting and difficult child they had. Which, of course, is the truth.
How does this pertain to this whole scenario? I don't know, but it seems like there is a whole lot of bitchy "I can't help myself" attitude going on, in a good majoirty of my friends unfortunately. It festers. It stagnates, like apathy. Yes, if you are doing stuff and taking small steps, so be it. I appreciate that. Just don't feed others and encourage them that it is O.K. to be miserable, or do self-checks to see whether or not you are really helping them... because you could be doing more harm then good.
3) What is the true definition of a friend? I really don't know, however I will point this out: What some people are expecting me to do right now is shitty, beyond shitty. Whether or not they are aware of my situation, I don't know. I do know if I don't talk to them face-to-face in the next couple days, they'll get pissed or be like "OMG WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME THIS EARLIER" type deal. Basically, it comes down to respect. I don't think I'm getting any; I'm told I have it, I just don't see any of it.
It comes in different ways from different people, I don't know. i'm going to bed.