i wished a looked a little more ordinary
if i looked ordinary then maybe i would have a boyfriend. i want to look like all the other girls do like with a different color hair, not this white-blonde; and a rounder face with darker eyes and bigger, pinker lips; bigger, rounder boobs; and maybe even an ass. then i would wear my tight pants with lots of pockets and a low-cut shirt with some jewelry around my wrists. then maybe i could keep his attention.
all right, i'm gonna be real about this. i've been feeling like i've been faking my happiness this time since Syc has been gone. of course he says "in order to be happy one must project an image of happiness" so i have been doing that, naturally i might add. i really have been doing well with myself, but since he's been gone i feel like i've lost a part of me. i want my life back needless to say. i'm not content with being left without my car. i'm not content catching rides back and forth, back and forth, it's exhausting! i'm not content with showering somewhere other than my home every night. i'm not content with living with my parents again, it gets annoying. i'm grown, gosh darnit. and i am a little worried about the gang since i haven't heard from them since they were in New Orleans last night.
last night i dreamed i was the army psychic and several soldiers got picked to go to Iraq and i had to assign them a number. 2 brother stepped up to me and the one that was afraid to let me see was #8 and the other was #15.
8 - "Eight stands for power of authority, success, karma, material gains, regeneration, and wealth. When the number eight appears in your dream, trust your instincts and intuition."-www.dreammoods.com
"In dreams, the number eight stands for success and rewards for hard work."-www.myjellybean.com
15 - "Fifteen represents a dissolution of difficult conditions."-www.dreammoods.com
"Fifteen symbolizes that a period of difficult conditions is coming to an end."-www.myjellybean.com
all right, i'm gonna be real about this. i've been feeling like i've been faking my happiness this time since Syc has been gone. of course he says "in order to be happy one must project an image of happiness" so i have been doing that, naturally i might add. i really have been doing well with myself, but since he's been gone i feel like i've lost a part of me. i want my life back needless to say. i'm not content with being left without my car. i'm not content catching rides back and forth, back and forth, it's exhausting! i'm not content with showering somewhere other than my home every night. i'm not content with living with my parents again, it gets annoying. i'm grown, gosh darnit. and i am a little worried about the gang since i haven't heard from them since they were in New Orleans last night.
last night i dreamed i was the army psychic and several soldiers got picked to go to Iraq and i had to assign them a number. 2 brother stepped up to me and the one that was afraid to let me see was #8 and the other was #15.
8 - "Eight stands for power of authority, success, karma, material gains, regeneration, and wealth. When the number eight appears in your dream, trust your instincts and intuition."-www.dreammoods.com
"In dreams, the number eight stands for success and rewards for hard work."-www.myjellybean.com
15 - "Fifteen represents a dissolution of difficult conditions."-www.dreammoods.com
"Fifteen symbolizes that a period of difficult conditions is coming to an end."-www.myjellybean.com