Seven hundred forty-eight pages of what?
Yeah, so I finally finished Brisingr. It's been three or four weeks since I began it, and it's just been very hard to get through. I'm normally a dedicated and quick reader. I read the Fellowship when I was 11 or 12 in the summer and finished it in three days. Granted I wasn't working and going to college then, but I just want to show that if a book is good I tend to put it before anything else. Summing up my feelings for Brisingr: boring with flashes of infuriating material.
I think I'm going to spend the last of my three posts about the gold brick griping, so be forewarned!
Talking Points:
#1 For some reason, CP seems to think it necessary to repetitively state the fact that the elves have slanted eyes. Like everytime an elf runs across the page. Especially Arya. I get it already!
#2 I love what Nasuada says to Eragon on p. 368: "By all the demons above and below, how many oaths have you and Saphira sworn? You seem to bind yourselves to everyone you meet." Eragon, obviously, has never read the Silmarillion. Oath-takers don't often have happy endings.
#3 Don't you love how Nasuada chooses Eragon to be her diplomatic representative to the dwarves and gives him a two hour lecture about the thirteen clans? "She schooled him in their history and their politics; in the products upon which each clan based the majority of is trade; in the names, families, and personalities of the clan chiefs; in the list of important tunnels excavated and controlled by each clan; and in what she felt would be the best way to coax the dwarves to elect a king or queen friendly to the goals of the Varden." (p. 370) Seriously, all this in two hours? In Western Civ class today my professor took 30 minutes to teach the barest details about the Umayyad Dynasty alone. All I can say is that if I had to memorize stuff I learned in two hours about thirteen dwarvish clans with crazy names like Az Swelden rak Anhun or Durgrimst Ragni Hefthyn, my head would explode.
#4 Oh yeah, I can't remember if I mentioned this before, but I despise Nasuada for trying to convince Elva to not let Eragon remove her curse. I can see asking an adult to stand something that causes discomfort or even some pain, but Elva is, what, a year or two old in reality and she suffers so much pain that Angela puts her to sleep during a big battle. I don't blame Elva for being unbalanced.
#5 How about p. 408? "Killing the beasts bothered Roran, but he understood the importance of denying them to the Empire and would have wielded the knife himself if asked." <.< Huh? Big strong Roran, born and raised on a little farm, has trouble watching oxen die? Okaaay. I'm glad he understands the importance of the oxen to the Empire because I don't. I can just see Galby reading the daily report: "Hmm, looks like one of my caravans got ambushed. Oh darn, they killed a couple of my favorite oxen. Gonna have to pull out all the stops now." I just feel like the Vardan aren't going to be making a huge dent in his assets this way.
#6 Is it just me or is a dwarf now attracted to Eragon? Say it isn't so! :(
#7 Earl Martland loses his sword hand. NOT TO WORRY, IT'S JUST A FLESH WOUND. Um, it's your sword hand. As a military leader, you might want to let Carn heal that.
#8 Eragon shows genocidal tendencies towards the enemy dwarf clan. "One of these days I will have to make peace with them. That or I'll have to finish what Galbatorix started." Nice. Real nice.
#9 I am no weapons expert. So can someone please tell me if you can really behead three people at once with a falchion? p. 451
#10 The chapters from Saphira's POV disappointed me. It got tiring to hear her keep thinking about how awesome she is and how much she misses Eragon. Also the whole break-bone-ground, sharp-pointy-trees, and black-blue-wolf-hair-Blodhgarm way of speech was jarring. Has she ever sounded like that when she is communicating with Eragon or anyone? No, didn't think so.
#11 Roran kills193 men. In one short battle. *falls off my chair laughing maniacally* Was there anyone left for the other guys? It sounds like when me and my little brothers used to roleplay as members of the Fellowship when we were 8, 10, and 12 years old. We would dress up, turn off the lights in our huge basement (Moria), draw our plastic swords and bows, and slay at least 200 orcs apiece plus the odd cavetroll or balrog. And we weren't always Gandalf, Legolas, or Aragorn. Sometimes we were hobbits, but that didn't seem to affect our kill count. Oh, and does anyone else find it slightly creepy that Carn watched Roran so closely during the fight that he could swear as to how many men Roran killed?
#12 Argh. I can take only so much of the politics of the dwarves, Nasuada rubs me the wrong way, I can't sympathize with Roran or even Katrina, Saphira fawns too much over her speshul rider, and speshul rider annoys the heck out of me.
#13 So Brom is Eragon's father, not Morzan. I feel like a hypocrite since I always complain that Eragon is too similar to Star Wars, but I don't like this twist. The reason for this is because it seems like another magical healing of Eragon's scar. Eragon is too good to bear a terrible scar like the one that Murtagh has, so he is healed by the elves. (Though I contend that everyone was just tired of him sulking about it). Then it seemed like Eragon shared a cruel, evil father with Murtagh, but as luck or CP would have it, even that imperfection in Eragon's life is removed.
#14 Arya is a Shadeslayer too now? Oh joy. I will choke in disgust if she ends up marrying Eragon. If she decides to follow that custom. But I will only choke briefly and give a slight cough. Cuz they really deserve each other.
#15 Aw, Oromis died. The sad thing is I don't really care. :-| I guess Glaedr is locked up in a stone now. Eragon and Saphira--1 Eldunari. Galbatorix, Shruiken, Murtagh, and Thorn--50? 100? 200? This does not looking promising. Bonus: I got to hear Galbatorix's voice. Of course, I still don't have a clue what he looks like.
That's it folks. And all I can say is just a bit of advice for one of the only characters I have liked throughout all the books. Murtagh, find a way to break Galbatorix's control over you and Thorn and high-tail it out of Alagaeasia. Leave the losers behind. Either that or stick around and probably get yourself killed while heroically saving Eragon. Trust me, it's not worth it.