..can't be classy when you laugh at farts..
My mum's biggest disappointment about me? I laugh at farts. Lol! Okay, so probably not her biggest disappointment, but she certainly resents my father for ever asking me to pull his finger... Come on! It's a classic gag! Probably 90% of fathers out there do that to their kid(s)! Generally their sons, but my dad never descriminated.. ;) So, apparently I have no class. I'm okay with that. I can at least pretend really well. But I swear, if I was at a restaurant on a date and some guy ripped a fat one behind me--I mean like, the mother of all farts--there would be just no stopping me. I would turn red as a rose and laugh myself silly. I'm laughing even now as I type the scenario! Lmao..
So it's probably a disease--a mental retardation I'll just never get rid of. But again, I'm okay with that. Call me classless (I don't care!), but it seems more absurd to me to be offended and angered by a fart than disgusted and amused. And let's face it, half the amusement about a fart is the disgust that ensues. Why do you think we laugh at gross jokes? Disgusting things are often simultaneously funny. And amusingly enough, the more foul a fart smells the funnier it is--especially for guys. In fact, I've known many guys to be more proud the stinkier it is! Now that I won't justify, but I don't look down on them for said behaviour.
Sure, farts are gross: they often stink, they sound nasty, and they come from your bowels--which on its own is a less-than-pleasant thought. Sure, it's not polite to break wind in front of other people [on purpose], unless they're close friends and/or family that don't really care or are used to the behaviour by now. If one slips on accident, say "excuse me"! No harm, no foul. (Pun intended, though there is question about the no foul part... ;p) Bottom line is, farting is a natural thing. People who get all worked up--"oh my God, did he just fart? How disgusting, what a jerk"--need to pull the sticks out of their arses and relax a little. Pucker factor is way too high, guys.
No one appreciates someone busting a rotten one nearby, but if you can't at least chuckle a little at the humour in the situation (it's there, I promise!), then you're simply wound too tight! Screw the thing they call "class". Having class simply means you don't rear up and Peter Griffin a fart out in public for all to smell and hear. Having class simply means you excuse yourself, even if you're doing it around like-minded people who don't give a shit (pun again intended). Having class simply means you excuse yourself and leave the room (or walk to the other side of the room) to let one go if you're around people it would bother, or someone you don't want to subject to something potentially stinky. Having class simply means that if you're going to let one fly, just play by the rules of those around you.
If they demand a score for the hurricane-force winds that just came roaring out of your arse, then you better give them a number! Point is, class is subjective, it's circumstantial. And it's another invention for people to look down on you because you know how to be happy and enjoy life, laugh at the little things, and find pleasure in the simplest of things, because they never grasped those concepts..
So go ahead, giggle at a toot and clutch your heart in feigned convulsions when that rotten smell accosts your very air. It's natural! Enjoy God's sense of humour. I hope you chuckled at this post, because I aimed to amuse. :)
So it's probably a disease--a mental retardation I'll just never get rid of. But again, I'm okay with that. Call me classless (I don't care!), but it seems more absurd to me to be offended and angered by a fart than disgusted and amused. And let's face it, half the amusement about a fart is the disgust that ensues. Why do you think we laugh at gross jokes? Disgusting things are often simultaneously funny. And amusingly enough, the more foul a fart smells the funnier it is--especially for guys. In fact, I've known many guys to be more proud the stinkier it is! Now that I won't justify, but I don't look down on them for said behaviour.
Sure, farts are gross: they often stink, they sound nasty, and they come from your bowels--which on its own is a less-than-pleasant thought. Sure, it's not polite to break wind in front of other people [on purpose], unless they're close friends and/or family that don't really care or are used to the behaviour by now. If one slips on accident, say "excuse me"! No harm, no foul. (Pun intended, though there is question about the no foul part... ;p) Bottom line is, farting is a natural thing. People who get all worked up--"oh my God, did he just fart? How disgusting, what a jerk"--need to pull the sticks out of their arses and relax a little. Pucker factor is way too high, guys.
No one appreciates someone busting a rotten one nearby, but if you can't at least chuckle a little at the humour in the situation (it's there, I promise!), then you're simply wound too tight! Screw the thing they call "class". Having class simply means you don't rear up and Peter Griffin a fart out in public for all to smell and hear. Having class simply means you excuse yourself, even if you're doing it around like-minded people who don't give a shit (pun again intended). Having class simply means you excuse yourself and leave the room (or walk to the other side of the room) to let one go if you're around people it would bother, or someone you don't want to subject to something potentially stinky. Having class simply means that if you're going to let one fly, just play by the rules of those around you.
If they demand a score for the hurricane-force winds that just came roaring out of your arse, then you better give them a number! Point is, class is subjective, it's circumstantial. And it's another invention for people to look down on you because you know how to be happy and enjoy life, laugh at the little things, and find pleasure in the simplest of things, because they never grasped those concepts..
So go ahead, giggle at a toot and clutch your heart in feigned convulsions when that rotten smell accosts your very air. It's natural! Enjoy God's sense of humour. I hope you chuckled at this post, because I aimed to amuse. :)