Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

[isabelledolce]

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Yesterday I went to have my haircut and decided to gossip with my stylist, Melissa. I've never really bonded with her before but I decided that I should solidify our relationship after six years together with only an occassional infidelity, once when travelling in France and I was seduced by the glamour of Toni &

Comments

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[rhapsodista]

I don't really feel like discussing the topic right now, but I'm sure there will be others who do. so, for their sake, I'll identify some preconceptions I see in this essay:

1. "Adulthood" begins when you settle down romantically, not when you start a career and live independently of support systems that existed in childhood.

2. Women WILL eventually want to start having children.

3. "Recent thirty-year-old divorcees" just want to have fun.

4. Women who wait to gain more experience before marrying are doing so because they just want to have fun.

It seems that this article is wrought with personal fear about future stability.

My background: Not married, not planning to get married until I am more settled in my career and find a good man with similar goals.

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[djadjavanja]

:))) too funny

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[isabelledolce]

Move over Hellen Gurley Brown, here comes Isabelle!

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[djadjavanja]

1. I didn't see any of that in the article. :(

2. Author is correct if you visit rich (!) suburbia. There are no mothers under 40.

3. What is your idea of Fun?

4. What experience are you talking about? For a man the more experience the female has the less likely he will be interested in her besides a one night stand.

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[sweetseadragon]

i live in "rich suburbia" and there are many mothers under forty. where did you get that information from? i find it odd that you use such broad generalizations.

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[djadjavanja]

in one of the most expensive places on the East Coast. when I first moved here and had to pick up my son after elementary school one day I saw a large crowd of grandmothers waiting to pick up their grandchildren. i was wrong! they were mothers.

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[djadjavanja]

of course. in truly affluent area (more then mine) they are trophy wives and usually former supermodels still in their 20's. as i said earlier only very rich or very poor have kids nowadays.

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[jendaby]

I'm neither rich nor poor, live in New York, and have two kids. I had the first when I was 29. I'm 33, have been with the same man since I was 20, still have female friends, and still have fun. Sometimes fun involves spending time with my kids. I live in a solidly middle-class neighborhood full of children. The other moms range from about 23 to 35. Only a few are immigrants. The neighborhood is very diverse, so it isn't a religious thing either.

I planned and budgeted before having kids, just like i did before buying a house...but I have a mortgage. I needed financial aid for college. Gross generalizations are seldom accurate.

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[djadjavanja]

Perhaps you are right and it has to do more the fact that young people can't afford to live where I am. And if they have money they choose SoHo. Hence there are older mothers around me.

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[djadjavanja]

We didn't budget to have kids. Our son was born when my wife was at college. There was actually a great daycare on campus. We lived oveseas as well and there was a fabulous support through the University. We got daycare as well even though the waiting list for locals was 5 years at least. Things sometimes work out for the best. And, yes, we have a lot of fun with our now grown up son doing thing. That is my idea of Fun.

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[technocracygirl]

For a man the more experience the female has the less likely he will be interested in her besides a one night stand.

Where does that statistic come from? Is there anything to back it up?

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[djadjavanja]

my male experience. if you think that any guy will tell it to his date, think again. ;)

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[technocracygirl]

Okay. That's your judgement based on the people you know. Based on the men that a) I know and b) I have had discussions about sex with, (which is quite a few) they prefer women with experience, because they're better in bed. Generally, though, for long-term anything, it's about personality connections. And my female friends who have been sexually active have partnered up just as much as the friends who weren't, so it looks like my anecdotes cancel out yours.

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[djadjavanja]

Of course they prefer! What can be better than an "experienced woman?" At least in the past they had to pay for the services rendered.