(no subject)
i didnt write about you before but ill write about you now. i dont even know if you will read this. i am trying to not be bitter because bitterness is a feeling that i am well acquainted with and one that i have grown a strong distaste for. i am sad but its ok because things are progressing as they should. you made the right desicion i think i am just confused about the future but i bet you are too. so we will meditate. i hope you get some good thinking done. lets just have no hard feelings ok? i didnt mean all th things that i said when i was drunk i swear i want to talk to you but i guess you dont want ot talk to me. thats ok. thats ok. thats ok. just know that i am thinking about you i swear. i swear. and i do care. and i try hard to be trusting its just hard. so goodnight you will inevitably be in my dreams as you were last night and the night before. my dreams make me feel insecure. searching looking wandering with and without aim simultaneously. goodnight i hope you are alright i worry too much maybe? should i not care? do you not want me to? i cant help it/ i cant. sorry. for better or for worse. ok thats it for now.
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