Dear kitten
I recognize that by reclining on my chest, purring ecstatically, and kneading my face you are expressing your affection for me. Or at least, your appreciation for my regular display of can-opening skills, which is the same thing in the end. I further recognize that by your standards you're hardly using any claw at all. And I also recognize that when you lick the end of my nose with your raspy tongue you are attempting to express your gratitude for the cream I gave you this morning. Assuming your memory goes back that far.
And yet. Ow. You're perforating my chin.
And yet. Ow. You're perforating my chin.