by
onkoona Atari (The Edo files, part 6)
Torajiro slid open the door to the goban room. It was late, but he didn't light the lamp. He sat in seiza at the board and removed the goke from atop it. He opened both, and took out a black stone and placed it on the board.
"Torajiro-kun, do you want to play a game?" his ever-present ghost asked.
Torajiro played a white stone.
No... not right now, Sai, thank you.
He played a row of white stones and then a row of black ones next to it. He played more black to place white in atari. He captured the white stones, taking them off one by one, hoarding them in his left hand. He then swiped the remaining blacks off the board into his hand to join the whites.
He continued to play stones randomly from his left hand after that.
She's dead, the go pro said.
Sai lifted his sleeve to his mouth.
The fever, he clarified.
Sai said nothing; there was nothing to say.
Torajiro stopped playing.
What is it like to be dead?
"Uh, I don't know..."
How can you not know; you are dead?
"I don't remember much." Sai hedged.
Tell me something, anything!
"After I died I waited, for a very long time."
... Was it very lonely?
"It was... Time doesn't pass the same as it does in the living world... I don't think I was lonely..."
"But you must remember I am a ghost, it may be different if you don't become a ghost."
Will I see her again, do you think?
There was no answer Sai could give.
They sat for a while longer and then Torajiro returned to his task of tending the sick. Sai floating after him.