UPDATE!
[hey kids]
*Wireless
So yeah, I haven't really update in this thing in quite some time. I really haven't been all into this internet thing. I maybe check my Myspace every once in a while. I haven't seen my email in weeks. And before that months. I think I have like 300 unread messages. Most mailing list bullshit that I will eventually read, but I'm sure there are important emails in there as well.
*Down in the dumps
I've been really fucking depressed the past couple of weeks. I still haven't been able to figure exactly why but I think it's a little bit of everything that has been affecting me. I'll break it down for you in this entry. But it's gotten really bad. I feel like I have no control over things and that pisses me off and then I get depressed. Or when I get really bored, I get pissed of and then feel depressed. I try to change it but outside elements prevent things from going my way. And I guess The main reason I'm depressed is that I have no control. I think I've stated that enough.
*Jayzor
I tend to cling to people from time to time. I think that was my flaw when I started networking w/ people. I make them feel like they're the most awesome person ever and then just fade out for months before I really talk to them again. And they're no longer interested. I've been doing that w/ Jay. I've been hanging out w/ him for the past two weeks straight. seriously I think there might have been maybe one day where we didn't hang out. He's really helped me through this depressed state, though he doesn't know it. Thanks dude. This time no phase out. Him, Jenn, and Kyle have made feel like settling down and not really just trying to be around people and making more friends. I think I have enough. I guess that's why Veronica is content w/ a few friends. They really do mean something.
*Homesick
I haven't talked to Jessica (bestfriend) in like 3 months. Her phone had been disconnected and I have no other means of reaching her. I miss her a lot. It made me think of my home in dallas. The crew hanging out all the time, doing drugs, and making art. I was my happiest then. It's not like that over there anymore. Everyone has split since I left. I think I'm just clinging on to a memory. But I do miss her. And the others. I guess that's why I hung out w/ Jay a lot more. He reminds me of them.
*The plagues
I got really fucking sick last week. I have no idea what I had but it sucked. I'm still feeling some lingering symptoms.
*Vrontron
She's been pissing me off lately. Some is no fault of her own and some is. When it is I really want to punch her. I still love her though. I just can't be around her right now. She has no idea why I'm so pissed. It's a lot of things. Stuff that was my fault, stuff that was hers, stuff that had happened, and stuff I wish happened. I really can't get into it b/c she reads this. But eventually we'll talk. Just not now. But all this has gotten me really fucking down.
*Heatwave
It's so fucking hot in Texas. Hotter than last year. It's mid-July and it's already at 104. It wasn't til early sept that it got to 103 degrees. This summer is going to suck ass. DAMN YOU GLOBAL WARMING!
*Euphoric
Are drugs worth it.? Fuck yes.
*Diva
Lauren already left Austin, but now it turns out she might leave Texas for good. FUCK THAT! I'll have to chain the bitch down. She always knew how to turn the dullest occasion into a fiesta. And I mean fiesta.
*Lovesick
I haven't had sex in almost a year. Not that there weren't offers but I just wasn't interested. Now that I am it's like pumping a dry well. I'm going crazy and pissed. It's making me think of possibilities w/ certain friends that I shouldn't be thinking about or that would ever happen so it's bumming me out. I've started becoming unintentionally ultra-flirty. I've even considered co-workers and have acted upon that only getting mixed signals. There's always plan B. Not being so specific w/ one gender.
*teleporter
I sometimes dislike being in texas. But I most of the time detest it. I need to plan a trip out of here. Any suggestions?
[ReZ]
*Wireless
So yeah, I haven't really update in this thing in quite some time. I really haven't been all into this internet thing. I maybe check my Myspace every once in a while. I haven't seen my email in weeks. And before that months. I think I have like 300 unread messages. Most mailing list bullshit that I will eventually read, but I'm sure there are important emails in there as well.
*Down in the dumps
I've been really fucking depressed the past couple of weeks. I still haven't been able to figure exactly why but I think it's a little bit of everything that has been affecting me. I'll break it down for you in this entry. But it's gotten really bad. I feel like I have no control over things and that pisses me off and then I get depressed. Or when I get really bored, I get pissed of and then feel depressed. I try to change it but outside elements prevent things from going my way. And I guess The main reason I'm depressed is that I have no control. I think I've stated that enough.
*Jayzor
I tend to cling to people from time to time. I think that was my flaw when I started networking w/ people. I make them feel like they're the most awesome person ever and then just fade out for months before I really talk to them again. And they're no longer interested. I've been doing that w/ Jay. I've been hanging out w/ him for the past two weeks straight. seriously I think there might have been maybe one day where we didn't hang out. He's really helped me through this depressed state, though he doesn't know it. Thanks dude. This time no phase out. Him, Jenn, and Kyle have made feel like settling down and not really just trying to be around people and making more friends. I think I have enough. I guess that's why Veronica is content w/ a few friends. They really do mean something.
*Homesick
I haven't talked to Jessica (bestfriend) in like 3 months. Her phone had been disconnected and I have no other means of reaching her. I miss her a lot. It made me think of my home in dallas. The crew hanging out all the time, doing drugs, and making art. I was my happiest then. It's not like that over there anymore. Everyone has split since I left. I think I'm just clinging on to a memory. But I do miss her. And the others. I guess that's why I hung out w/ Jay a lot more. He reminds me of them.
*The plagues
I got really fucking sick last week. I have no idea what I had but it sucked. I'm still feeling some lingering symptoms.
*Vrontron
She's been pissing me off lately. Some is no fault of her own and some is. When it is I really want to punch her. I still love her though. I just can't be around her right now. She has no idea why I'm so pissed. It's a lot of things. Stuff that was my fault, stuff that was hers, stuff that had happened, and stuff I wish happened. I really can't get into it b/c she reads this. But eventually we'll talk. Just not now. But all this has gotten me really fucking down.
*Heatwave
It's so fucking hot in Texas. Hotter than last year. It's mid-July and it's already at 104. It wasn't til early sept that it got to 103 degrees. This summer is going to suck ass. DAMN YOU GLOBAL WARMING!
*Euphoric
Are drugs worth it.? Fuck yes.
*Diva
Lauren already left Austin, but now it turns out she might leave Texas for good. FUCK THAT! I'll have to chain the bitch down. She always knew how to turn the dullest occasion into a fiesta. And I mean fiesta.
*Lovesick
I haven't had sex in almost a year. Not that there weren't offers but I just wasn't interested. Now that I am it's like pumping a dry well. I'm going crazy and pissed. It's making me think of possibilities w/ certain friends that I shouldn't be thinking about or that would ever happen so it's bumming me out. I've started becoming unintentionally ultra-flirty. I've even considered co-workers and have acted upon that only getting mixed signals. There's always plan B. Not being so specific w/ one gender.
*teleporter
I sometimes dislike being in texas. But I most of the time detest it. I need to plan a trip out of here. Any suggestions?
[ReZ]