happily ever before, during, and after:the perfect ending.

[anotherbetty]

everything is much different now. i am in no way complaining about such changes. but it should be known to anyone out there who has ever cared enough about me to know these things. we probably don't talk as much now, if at all. we probably don't see as much of each other anymore, if at all. there are reasons for these actions or lack there of. maybe they aren't good reasons and quite possibly they are all together selfish. noneless, i feel justified. and well, we all know that it's survival of the fittest. lets face it, we are out to please ourselves. i don't work so that i can feed your mouths. i do not waste my time trying to make it so that you can have a roof over your head and a smile on your face. my obligation for finding love and happiness is for myself and no other than just that. all the same, you do none of these things for me. you work for your reasons. and you learn from your mistakes to make your life better. you try so that you can put a smile on your own face.
for a very long time, i didn't do anything for myself. i'm not saying that i went out of my way all the time for everyone else, but i used to be much more hesitant to what i wanted to do if it meant that a "friend" would be the slightest bit upset.
well i'm just here to tell you that i am different.
i am happy.
i work for me.
i learn for my life.
i smile because i'm proud.
this is my last post. i don't think i will delete my journal. at least not for a while. every couples of weeks i would like to be able to look back at what i have written and remind myself of everything i have ever felt.
i just wanted it to end in a way that meant something to me.
i wanted to end it on a good note. {closure if you will.}

for now and for always, i owe this entire entry, this metamorphasis, this completely one hundred percent happiness to the most amazing person i've ever known.

mms, thank you for everything you'll never fully comprehend.
with love.