To the girl who is changing me
Dear Girl, more commonly know has Hpets,
You are changing me without a word. You make me look at myself in a realistic way. You take away all these fake layers and expose this scared little girl hiding underneith. You make me lie far less than I would otherwise. You don't put up with my bullshit. You're understanding and you care about me. You love me and it means so much.
Now I have a question to ask you. Are you using my affection to keep me here? You string me on, telling me that I'm beautiful, that I make you smile, that I say "the cutest [things] ever." You let me believe there is something there. When I flirt, you flirt right back. But when I ask you if something is there, you deny it, telling me that you have told me hundreds of times that there is not. Are you afraid? Afraid to hurt her? Afraid of being with a girl? Afraid of getting too close? Afraid of me? Afraid of love? Or were you just using my affection to keep me here? Regardless, I'll live for those moments when you let me believe we can have something. Those moments keep me going.
If you read this, you would have too much to say. You would sigh that long, heavy sigh and say my name like I was being stupid again. You would think that I am pathetic. You would catalog it so you could bring it back up later on. "Remember the time you told everyone we were dating?" Don't bring it up. I'm embarrassed on top of which I am hurt...I was happy. I truly believed we were dating. I truly believed I was going to be happy.
Now one more question: are you going to hurt me? Girl, don't hurt me. Hpets...you know how fragile I am. Don't hurt me, please. I'm trusting you not to.
Love,
Nosilla
You are changing me without a word. You make me look at myself in a realistic way. You take away all these fake layers and expose this scared little girl hiding underneith. You make me lie far less than I would otherwise. You don't put up with my bullshit. You're understanding and you care about me. You love me and it means so much.
Now I have a question to ask you. Are you using my affection to keep me here? You string me on, telling me that I'm beautiful, that I make you smile, that I say "the cutest [things] ever." You let me believe there is something there. When I flirt, you flirt right back. But when I ask you if something is there, you deny it, telling me that you have told me hundreds of times that there is not. Are you afraid? Afraid to hurt her? Afraid of being with a girl? Afraid of getting too close? Afraid of me? Afraid of love? Or were you just using my affection to keep me here? Regardless, I'll live for those moments when you let me believe we can have something. Those moments keep me going.
If you read this, you would have too much to say. You would sigh that long, heavy sigh and say my name like I was being stupid again. You would think that I am pathetic. You would catalog it so you could bring it back up later on. "Remember the time you told everyone we were dating?" Don't bring it up. I'm embarrassed on top of which I am hurt...I was happy. I truly believed we were dating. I truly believed I was going to be happy.
Now one more question: are you going to hurt me? Girl, don't hurt me. Hpets...you know how fragile I am. Don't hurt me, please. I'm trusting you not to.
Love,
Nosilla