wow, chapter 100. i've been plowing through this thing...
sorry i didn't comment on a bunch in between, but this is just so lovely, and i'm enjoying the build-up.
some specifically good points:
-when spock is blind and everyone knows he and jim are in love -when spock loses his balance on the train and jim holds his hips -the repeats of the jewish quote -the "let me help" precindent
by the by, have you seen "the ship's closet" on youtube? it's made of awesome.
A beautiful chapter, but also a very sad one. The weight on Jim's shoulders-- I could feel it. And when an author can place that emotion directly into the reader's heart... I can't really describe it, but it's powerful. You have more than just a talent for writing. It's the ability to touch the human mind that others find too hard to do. Every single chapter in this story carries weight, a message, thoughts-- I know I'm just rambling and you've heard it plenty of times before (and I always repeat myself), but this story you are writing is completely amazing, in every sense of the word.
So many things come full circle here, and you do a beautiful job reminding the reader of the themes through Spock: the eulogy Jim gave for the deceased crew member, the paired ginko trees, Spock's own commitment to serving at Jim's side, his willingness to lay down his life for Jim, and ultimately his awareness that there is liitle he can do to help Jim make this choice beyond be there with him and stand by his decision. Still, it makes my heart hurt, because you may have actually created a no-win for Jim, because short of taking Edith aboard the Enterprise with him, I can't see how he can get around this.
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sorry i didn't comment on a bunch in between, but this is just so lovely, and i'm enjoying the build-up.
some specifically good points:
-when spock is blind and everyone knows he and jim are in love
-when spock loses his balance on the train and jim holds his hips
-the repeats of the jewish quote
-the "let me help" precindent
by the by, have you seen "the ship's closet" on youtube? it's made of awesome.
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The weight on Jim's shoulders-- I could feel it. And when an author can place that emotion directly into the reader's heart... I can't really describe it, but it's powerful. You have more than just a talent for writing. It's the ability to touch the human mind that others find too hard to do. Every single chapter in this story carries weight, a message, thoughts-- I know I'm just rambling and you've heard it plenty of times before (and I always repeat myself), but this story you are writing is completely amazing, in every sense of the word.
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And the last three words? Perfect.
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