Fic: Why Does My Heart Cry
There was this amazing prompt at st_xi_kink:
So Kirk and Gaila were in an actual loving, monogamous relationship. The teasing in the movie (that's so weird and other guys) was just that, teasing. Trouble is, because of Kirk's reputation and Gaila being Orion, no one believes they're truly in love. Everyone assumes that the two sluts are using each other and even if it is a relationship, it must be an open one, because they would never turn down more sex, right? So Kirk and Gaila keep getting all upset at people's assumptions (and all the "hey, can I join you"), but their time together keeps them calm because they know it's the real thing. I want a beautiful loving relationship here, it's not all sex! :-)
And recently I just couldn't top thinking about it, because these two are just so cute together!
Why Does My Heart Cry
Jim was walking from one of his late seminars, feeling mighty tired. Due to his plan to finish four year track in three he had quite a big load of classes to take each semester that meant lots of studying and not much free time.
Yet when he heard woman voice saying: “I said no, and I mean it!” followed by: “Oh, do not play hard to get!” he was immediately fully awake and on war path in the direction of voices.
“Excuse me, gentlemen,” he drawled when he came closer, he didn’t quite see the woman, she had her back turned to him, but she had the most amazing red hair, “but I believe the lady said no.”
“Go away,” barked the other from two men who were probably way too close for comfort to the woman.
“I won’t,” he retorted and things went south pretty quickly from there. There had been several punches flying around, both the men disappearing rather quickly once they found out that they won’t get what they want and Jim finally turned to look around for the woman in question.
She was green (Orion, his mind offered), she was looking scared and she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.
She was also still looking rather scared, so he smiled in a way he hoped would look reassuring and offered to see her to her dorm. It was short walk there, and neither of them said anything.
Only when they were standing in front of the doors, she turned to him, leaned up to kiss him lightly on cheek and with whispered “thank you” she disappeared into the building, leaving him and his wildly beating heart standing there alone.
It didn’t occurred to him until later, when he was being chewed by Bones for coming to their room with knuckles obviously bruised from a fight that he didn’t know her name.
- - - - -
He’s in library, making notes from some book for tactical class when there is quiet “hello” next to him.
His heart nearly skips a beat when he realizes it’s the girl from the night few days ago, sitting next to him with a small smile on her lips. How he managed to stutter a response to her was beyond his understanding but she was smiling and had such lovely eyes…
Gaila. Her name was Gaila and she was from the Engineering track, the only Orion woman in the ‘fleet. That was when he finally got his thoughts together, they chatted for long time, notes and books completely forgotten, until the library is closing for the day, the night already setting in outside the building. He walked her to her dorm again, this time while speaking to her the whole walk, sharing jokes, as well as humorous observations of their instructors.
Gaila smiled at him one last time and with a wish of a good night entered the building.
“See you around, Jim.”
And she will, he promised to himself, even if he should orchestrate the opportunities for it himself.
- - - - -
They kept on stumbling into each other for the next few weeks, bumping into each other in the corridors; suddenly the only empty place in the whole Academy cafeteria is by Jim or Gaila; the book just out of Gaila’s reach was handed to her by Jim who suddenly appeared by the same bookcase…
When Jim asked Gaila to go with him for a date, she didn’t think long about that before she said yes.
Jim was waiting for Gaila at her dorm, wearing civvies (his only possession left from his previous life of a genius offender), he was caught unaware of how much prettier Gaila could be. She was wearing dress, knee-length one, her hair tied into a loose bun.
“You sure you are not from Security track?” he blurted, causing Gaila giving him a surprised look. “Because you sure are set on stunning.”
That was definitely awkward, which he realized as soon as the words left his mouth, but Gaila just giggled into her palm, blushing slightly. Linking her arm with his, she asked him about the movie they were about to see. It was one of those silly romance comedies - but from what he gathered from their talks, he hoped she would enjoy it.
When the theatre got dark and the movie started, he slowly laid his arm around her shoulders, careful about how she might react. She just glanced up to him, and with a small smile she laid her head on his shoulder.
He had no idea what the movie was about, but the feeling of Gaila at his side, trusting him with herself, kept him awake for the rest of the night.
- - - - -
They were dating for about a month, when the rumours and unpleasant questions start to appear.
“How is she in bed?”
“He must be a real tiger in the sack, isn’t he?”
“Hey, babe, whenever he gets too boring for you, you know whom to call to spice the things up!”
“Tell me, man, what does she do with that pretty mouth of hers?”
“Is she even enough for you, man? I mean, you got lots of likes her before, ya?”
“Seriously, babe, you should look elsewhere time to time - Orions need more than one man, don’t they?”
They both were upset by that. They didn’t even get beyond the kissing, hugging and possibly cuddling stage - and people are already asking them about their sex life.
“Why are people so nasty?” asked Gaila once, when they were sitting in his and Bones’ room. Bones rolled their eyes at that and grumbled: “Because they got their heads up their asses so much that they do not know where their business ends and someone else’s starts.”
Bones was good. He was a real Southern gentleman when Jim introduced Gaila to him, and Gaila adored him for treating her in the way he did. For all the grumbling and complaining and generally being one grumbly pain in neck he was one of the least judgemental people both of them knew.
Not to mention that it was his remark about painful hypos for too curious people that stopped the gossip for at least a short time, before they began anew, this time they were about Jim, Bones and Gaila in a threesome - and who knows who is the bottom from the three of them!
It never was like that - but when the time of Jim’s birthday came and it became evident it won’t be a pleasant day, it was Gaila pressed to his side and Leonard leaning on the wall next to them, who made the day bearable in the end.
- - - - -
The first time they made love they were dating for over a year, and it’s a sweet and cuddly evening; touches are teasing, kisses are lingering… The emotions run deep in both of them, as they fell asleep nestled against each other, small smile on both their lips.
La vie est belle. Life is beautiful.
- - - - -
It was only about month before their graduation when Jim popped the question, kneeling in front of Gaila with a small box in his hands, as he asked: “Will you marry me?”
Gaila squealed like a little girl and dropped down to him, throwing her arms around his neck. “Yes, yes, thousand yes!”
The ring, platinum with small padparascha gem in shade as fiery as her hair, rested on her finger for the rest of the day, only to be hidden afterwards. No one but Bones knew about their engagement, and in his gruff way he congratulated them profoundly, the small quirk of his lips betraying the delight he felt for them. But ring, hidden in its box in the depths of Gaila’s wardrobe, was secret to be kept until they graduate.
It will show all those dumbasses that you can be Orion or a supposed manwhore, and still be happy in monogamous relationship.
- - - - -
Gaila and Jim both worked hard on Jim being ready for his third and also final try at Kobayashi Maru simulation.
She and Leonard both knew all too well how badly Jim took his two failures at that simulation, and although both of them knew the scenario is meant to be unbeatable, they patiently went through the routines and tactics with him again and again. “I don’t believe in no-win scenarios,” Jim would repeat over and over, Gaila and Len just nodding to that.
Soon it became apparent that Jim is planning something but no matter how hard pressed, he wouldn’t tell them what. He only told them that it’s nothing life-threatening.
Somehow, it didn’t do anything for the peace of their minds.
- - - - -
The day before Jim’s final try at Kobayashi Maru came and they both feel completely carefree. Jim took Gaila for a nice walk through San Francisco; both of them enjoyed a nice lunch at small restaurant on the other side of the city and both of them were laughing when they chased each other in the park at Academy grounds. Not even several acidic remarks about one woman not being enough and spicing their life a bit could cloud the day for them.
And last but not least - Gaila’s roommate was not supposed to come into their quarters today, leaving them the night all for themselves.
They both were only in their underwear, tickling each other and giggling, when Gaila kissed Jim and breathed dramatically: “I love you.” Jim teasingly kissed her on neck, whispering back: “Ooooh, that’s just so weird.”
That was when they were interrupted by sudden appearance of Gaila’s roommate, No-first-name Uhura. “Shouldn’t she be away for today?” asked Jim, surprised. Gaila rolled him off the bed. “Damn, she hates it so much when I bring boys in here,” she giggled, while he gave her one last kiss before diving under bed.
Uhura came in the room, and while she was quickly telling Gaila about her day, she suddenly heard him breathe under Gaila’s bed and before he knew it, Uhura, also wearing only underwear, as she was changing from her cadet uniform, was pushing him out of their room, not minding in the least that he was wearing only his briefs. With only one last glance at giggling Gaila he was out in the corridor, luckily alone.
Meanwhile Gaila had been listening to Nyota berating her for bringing one of her boyfriends in their room. “He’s my only boyfriend,” she said defensively. Her fiancé. Uhura just rolled her eyes in clear gesture of ‘right, see how much I believe you’ and went to the bathroom to take a quick shower, leaving Gaila alone.
She liked Nyota, and she was sure that Nyota liked her in her own way, too. But every time she rolled her eyes like that… It just hurt to know that even people you viewed as your closest friends actually didn’t know you in the least.
- - - - -
Jim cheated. Jim cheated on the Kobayashi Maru. Jim cheated on that damn simulation, changing the source code and adding several subroutines, which allowed him to defeat the enemy ships.
If Gaila didn’t see the changes in the code herself and wasn’t present as one of the observers, she would never believe anything like that is even possible. Oh yes, the changes in the code, so subtle and elegant in their simplicity, yet bearing such a strong ability to change things…
It didn’t took long before their class got called together for an academic hearing. Cause - Jim Kirk versus Leading Programmer of Kobayashi Maru. She knew the Vulcan instructor; he had been teaching several programming classes for Engineering track, and Nyota couldn’t shut up about him.
“You, James T. Kirk, should know more than anyone that Captain can’t cheat death.”
If the whole hearing wasn’t disrupted only moments later because of emergency call from Vulcan, causing every cadet from the graduating class to report to appointed spaceship, she would probably rose from her place and went on her merry way to scratch the damn Vulcan’s eyes out.
- - - - -
They searched for each other in the bustle by the shuttles, Gaila falling into Jim’s arms.
“Jim,” she said, her voice quiet, with a touch of reproach. “You should have told me - how did you manage to break into the code anyway?”
“I’ll tell you later, Gaila, yes?” he responded, and when she nodded, he kissed her goodbye, running to join Bones by the instructor giving assignments, as she run towards shuttle to her ship, Farragut.
She’s down in the engine room, when Farragut leaves the subspace by arriving to Vulcan and is immediately shot to pieces. As the ship around her broke into pieces, she allowed herself to have one last thought.
Such a pity I won’t get to wear Jim’s ring.
- - - - -
Half the ‘fleet was saved, just as Earth was, people hailed the mostly cadet crew of Enterprise as heroes, and Jim was mourning.
Mourning the loss of Vulcan and all the people there. Mourning the loss of most of graduating class. Mourning the destroyed spaceships that were destroyed by Nero quicker than they could realize what is happening. Small part of him is mourning the life which never was his to take.
But most of all, he was mourning Gaila, and when Leonard finally read the casualties list and found her name there, he was mourning her, too.
Uhura found them both in the room which used to be hers and Gaila’s on the day of graduation, bottle of bourbon passing between them, as they were looking at small circle of platinum with padparascha gem in it and cried. In shock, she hid her mouth behind her palm, as she stuttered: “I… I didn’t… I didn’t know…”
“Yeah,” replied Jim brokenly. “No one but Bones here knew.”
Bones’ arms encircled him as he cried. Gaila was no more, even the bed which used to be hers no longer held her sweet smell; the only things remaining of her being the engagement ring, some personal belongings and several pictures with her, Jim and Bones on them.
Gaila was no more, and even with Bones by his side, he couldn’t feel any more lonelier.
So Kirk and Gaila were in an actual loving, monogamous relationship. The teasing in the movie (that's so weird and other guys) was just that, teasing. Trouble is, because of Kirk's reputation and Gaila being Orion, no one believes they're truly in love. Everyone assumes that the two sluts are using each other and even if it is a relationship, it must be an open one, because they would never turn down more sex, right? So Kirk and Gaila keep getting all upset at people's assumptions (and all the "hey, can I join you"), but their time together keeps them calm because they know it's the real thing. I want a beautiful loving relationship here, it's not all sex! :-)
And recently I just couldn't top thinking about it, because these two are just so cute together!
Why Does My Heart Cry
Jim was walking from one of his late seminars, feeling mighty tired. Due to his plan to finish four year track in three he had quite a big load of classes to take each semester that meant lots of studying and not much free time.
Yet when he heard woman voice saying: “I said no, and I mean it!” followed by: “Oh, do not play hard to get!” he was immediately fully awake and on war path in the direction of voices.
“Excuse me, gentlemen,” he drawled when he came closer, he didn’t quite see the woman, she had her back turned to him, but she had the most amazing red hair, “but I believe the lady said no.”
“Go away,” barked the other from two men who were probably way too close for comfort to the woman.
“I won’t,” he retorted and things went south pretty quickly from there. There had been several punches flying around, both the men disappearing rather quickly once they found out that they won’t get what they want and Jim finally turned to look around for the woman in question.
She was green (Orion, his mind offered), she was looking scared and she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.
She was also still looking rather scared, so he smiled in a way he hoped would look reassuring and offered to see her to her dorm. It was short walk there, and neither of them said anything.
Only when they were standing in front of the doors, she turned to him, leaned up to kiss him lightly on cheek and with whispered “thank you” she disappeared into the building, leaving him and his wildly beating heart standing there alone.
It didn’t occurred to him until later, when he was being chewed by Bones for coming to their room with knuckles obviously bruised from a fight that he didn’t know her name.
- - - - -
He’s in library, making notes from some book for tactical class when there is quiet “hello” next to him.
His heart nearly skips a beat when he realizes it’s the girl from the night few days ago, sitting next to him with a small smile on her lips. How he managed to stutter a response to her was beyond his understanding but she was smiling and had such lovely eyes…
Gaila. Her name was Gaila and she was from the Engineering track, the only Orion woman in the ‘fleet. That was when he finally got his thoughts together, they chatted for long time, notes and books completely forgotten, until the library is closing for the day, the night already setting in outside the building. He walked her to her dorm again, this time while speaking to her the whole walk, sharing jokes, as well as humorous observations of their instructors.
Gaila smiled at him one last time and with a wish of a good night entered the building.
“See you around, Jim.”
And she will, he promised to himself, even if he should orchestrate the opportunities for it himself.
- - - - -
They kept on stumbling into each other for the next few weeks, bumping into each other in the corridors; suddenly the only empty place in the whole Academy cafeteria is by Jim or Gaila; the book just out of Gaila’s reach was handed to her by Jim who suddenly appeared by the same bookcase…
When Jim asked Gaila to go with him for a date, she didn’t think long about that before she said yes.
Jim was waiting for Gaila at her dorm, wearing civvies (his only possession left from his previous life of a genius offender), he was caught unaware of how much prettier Gaila could be. She was wearing dress, knee-length one, her hair tied into a loose bun.
“You sure you are not from Security track?” he blurted, causing Gaila giving him a surprised look. “Because you sure are set on stunning.”
That was definitely awkward, which he realized as soon as the words left his mouth, but Gaila just giggled into her palm, blushing slightly. Linking her arm with his, she asked him about the movie they were about to see. It was one of those silly romance comedies - but from what he gathered from their talks, he hoped she would enjoy it.
When the theatre got dark and the movie started, he slowly laid his arm around her shoulders, careful about how she might react. She just glanced up to him, and with a small smile she laid her head on his shoulder.
He had no idea what the movie was about, but the feeling of Gaila at his side, trusting him with herself, kept him awake for the rest of the night.
- - - - -
They were dating for about a month, when the rumours and unpleasant questions start to appear.
“How is she in bed?”
“He must be a real tiger in the sack, isn’t he?”
“Hey, babe, whenever he gets too boring for you, you know whom to call to spice the things up!”
“Tell me, man, what does she do with that pretty mouth of hers?”
“Is she even enough for you, man? I mean, you got lots of likes her before, ya?”
“Seriously, babe, you should look elsewhere time to time - Orions need more than one man, don’t they?”
They both were upset by that. They didn’t even get beyond the kissing, hugging and possibly cuddling stage - and people are already asking them about their sex life.
“Why are people so nasty?” asked Gaila once, when they were sitting in his and Bones’ room. Bones rolled their eyes at that and grumbled: “Because they got their heads up their asses so much that they do not know where their business ends and someone else’s starts.”
Bones was good. He was a real Southern gentleman when Jim introduced Gaila to him, and Gaila adored him for treating her in the way he did. For all the grumbling and complaining and generally being one grumbly pain in neck he was one of the least judgemental people both of them knew.
Not to mention that it was his remark about painful hypos for too curious people that stopped the gossip for at least a short time, before they began anew, this time they were about Jim, Bones and Gaila in a threesome - and who knows who is the bottom from the three of them!
It never was like that - but when the time of Jim’s birthday came and it became evident it won’t be a pleasant day, it was Gaila pressed to his side and Leonard leaning on the wall next to them, who made the day bearable in the end.
- - - - -
The first time they made love they were dating for over a year, and it’s a sweet and cuddly evening; touches are teasing, kisses are lingering… The emotions run deep in both of them, as they fell asleep nestled against each other, small smile on both their lips.
La vie est belle. Life is beautiful.
- - - - -
It was only about month before their graduation when Jim popped the question, kneeling in front of Gaila with a small box in his hands, as he asked: “Will you marry me?”
Gaila squealed like a little girl and dropped down to him, throwing her arms around his neck. “Yes, yes, thousand yes!”
The ring, platinum with small padparascha gem in shade as fiery as her hair, rested on her finger for the rest of the day, only to be hidden afterwards. No one but Bones knew about their engagement, and in his gruff way he congratulated them profoundly, the small quirk of his lips betraying the delight he felt for them. But ring, hidden in its box in the depths of Gaila’s wardrobe, was secret to be kept until they graduate.
It will show all those dumbasses that you can be Orion or a supposed manwhore, and still be happy in monogamous relationship.
- - - - -
Gaila and Jim both worked hard on Jim being ready for his third and also final try at Kobayashi Maru simulation.
She and Leonard both knew all too well how badly Jim took his two failures at that simulation, and although both of them knew the scenario is meant to be unbeatable, they patiently went through the routines and tactics with him again and again. “I don’t believe in no-win scenarios,” Jim would repeat over and over, Gaila and Len just nodding to that.
Soon it became apparent that Jim is planning something but no matter how hard pressed, he wouldn’t tell them what. He only told them that it’s nothing life-threatening.
Somehow, it didn’t do anything for the peace of their minds.
- - - - -
The day before Jim’s final try at Kobayashi Maru came and they both feel completely carefree. Jim took Gaila for a nice walk through San Francisco; both of them enjoyed a nice lunch at small restaurant on the other side of the city and both of them were laughing when they chased each other in the park at Academy grounds. Not even several acidic remarks about one woman not being enough and spicing their life a bit could cloud the day for them.
And last but not least - Gaila’s roommate was not supposed to come into their quarters today, leaving them the night all for themselves.
They both were only in their underwear, tickling each other and giggling, when Gaila kissed Jim and breathed dramatically: “I love you.” Jim teasingly kissed her on neck, whispering back: “Ooooh, that’s just so weird.”
That was when they were interrupted by sudden appearance of Gaila’s roommate, No-first-name Uhura. “Shouldn’t she be away for today?” asked Jim, surprised. Gaila rolled him off the bed. “Damn, she hates it so much when I bring boys in here,” she giggled, while he gave her one last kiss before diving under bed.
Uhura came in the room, and while she was quickly telling Gaila about her day, she suddenly heard him breathe under Gaila’s bed and before he knew it, Uhura, also wearing only underwear, as she was changing from her cadet uniform, was pushing him out of their room, not minding in the least that he was wearing only his briefs. With only one last glance at giggling Gaila he was out in the corridor, luckily alone.
Meanwhile Gaila had been listening to Nyota berating her for bringing one of her boyfriends in their room. “He’s my only boyfriend,” she said defensively. Her fiancé. Uhura just rolled her eyes in clear gesture of ‘right, see how much I believe you’ and went to the bathroom to take a quick shower, leaving Gaila alone.
She liked Nyota, and she was sure that Nyota liked her in her own way, too. But every time she rolled her eyes like that… It just hurt to know that even people you viewed as your closest friends actually didn’t know you in the least.
- - - - -
Jim cheated. Jim cheated on the Kobayashi Maru. Jim cheated on that damn simulation, changing the source code and adding several subroutines, which allowed him to defeat the enemy ships.
If Gaila didn’t see the changes in the code herself and wasn’t present as one of the observers, she would never believe anything like that is even possible. Oh yes, the changes in the code, so subtle and elegant in their simplicity, yet bearing such a strong ability to change things…
It didn’t took long before their class got called together for an academic hearing. Cause - Jim Kirk versus Leading Programmer of Kobayashi Maru. She knew the Vulcan instructor; he had been teaching several programming classes for Engineering track, and Nyota couldn’t shut up about him.
“You, James T. Kirk, should know more than anyone that Captain can’t cheat death.”
If the whole hearing wasn’t disrupted only moments later because of emergency call from Vulcan, causing every cadet from the graduating class to report to appointed spaceship, she would probably rose from her place and went on her merry way to scratch the damn Vulcan’s eyes out.
- - - - -
They searched for each other in the bustle by the shuttles, Gaila falling into Jim’s arms.
“Jim,” she said, her voice quiet, with a touch of reproach. “You should have told me - how did you manage to break into the code anyway?”
“I’ll tell you later, Gaila, yes?” he responded, and when she nodded, he kissed her goodbye, running to join Bones by the instructor giving assignments, as she run towards shuttle to her ship, Farragut.
She’s down in the engine room, when Farragut leaves the subspace by arriving to Vulcan and is immediately shot to pieces. As the ship around her broke into pieces, she allowed herself to have one last thought.
Such a pity I won’t get to wear Jim’s ring.
- - - - -
Half the ‘fleet was saved, just as Earth was, people hailed the mostly cadet crew of Enterprise as heroes, and Jim was mourning.
Mourning the loss of Vulcan and all the people there. Mourning the loss of most of graduating class. Mourning the destroyed spaceships that were destroyed by Nero quicker than they could realize what is happening. Small part of him is mourning the life which never was his to take.
But most of all, he was mourning Gaila, and when Leonard finally read the casualties list and found her name there, he was mourning her, too.
Uhura found them both in the room which used to be hers and Gaila’s on the day of graduation, bottle of bourbon passing between them, as they were looking at small circle of platinum with padparascha gem in it and cried. In shock, she hid her mouth behind her palm, as she stuttered: “I… I didn’t… I didn’t know…”
“Yeah,” replied Jim brokenly. “No one but Bones here knew.”
Bones’ arms encircled him as he cried. Gaila was no more, even the bed which used to be hers no longer held her sweet smell; the only things remaining of her being the engagement ring, some personal belongings and several pictures with her, Jim and Bones on them.
Gaila was no more, and even with Bones by his side, he couldn’t feel any more lonelier.