(AU) Writing Is Hard....
Personal Stuff on the Wincest Big Bang and life in general. (aka, gotta get this out somehow so I can move the fuck on)
I've been writing this Wincest Big Bang since July.
Yeah, the Big Bang started in February but me and my dumb ass decided I was gonna finish my Wincest Mob!AU that I've been talking about since about a year after I started my journey into the SPN fandom.
Surprise to absolutely no one but me - writing a Wincest AU is fucking hard!!!
Picking up their relationship and slapping it in an AU requires so much more "building the backstory" than I ever anticipated. Their lives are fucking weird, no wonder it's so easy to put them together in canon. They've been through some heavy shit that made them as close as they are.
So, I start seriously building/piecing together the Mob!AU in February and by the end of June:
• Only added about 15k of usable content
• Re-plotted it about 3 times so it makes more sense and I can power through it faster when I'm actually writing it
• Made so many notes about characterization so I'm able to keep them straight and know how they will all interact with each other
• Wrote/Blocked out the big climax of the entire fic; the fucked up part that made me want to write this Mob!AU to begin with. (Sorry I like making you suffer Sammy!!)
But, at the end of June, I realize there is no possible fucking way I can finish the Mob!AU before the end of this Bang.
*headdesk*
Queue me deciding I'm going to pick another of my WIPs to do for this challenge.
Low and behold:
An AU where Sam and Dean were raised apart and Sam grew up Men of Letters and Dean grew up a hunter. (Do you see where this is going?)
So, I'm 38k words into this fic (remind you; I started in July) and I realized about 3 weeks ago that this fic is gonna have to be part 1 of... several.
There is so much world building I need to do to make the relationship not a rush job. There is nothing I fucking hate more than a writer doing a hand wave and being like "They love each other so much!".
Pro-tip: Unless you're doing short stories and you wanna explore quickly how these two very different people interact; You NEED to show WHY they "love each other so much".
And it is a big bang, so a showing of how is necessary.
I will be utilizing a "shortcut" to get them to sleep together (because somehow these fics are only good if they have sex?? idk but I stopped questioning it a while ago because, well, frankly I'm good at writing sex with emotion. ::shrug::). And them having sex in this part logically makes sense for the denial of their insecurities AND it will open the door for them to go from 'friends to friends with benefits to lovers' as I build this world further.
*sigh* I hate shortcuts in writing... even though them coming at the sex from a perspective of "it'll just be for fun" does fit into the partnership they establish in the part I'm writing now.
Well, that and the fact they don't know they're brothers yet helps. That fun will come in another part because there is so much more they need to learn about each other before they learn that nugget of truth and they decide it's not as big of deal compared to what they've already built.
So Imma finish this Wincest BB fic and then immediately jump into the Dean Winchester Big Bang that I signed up for. It's a very dark fic where Demon!Dean pretty much goes around and does whatever the fuck he wants but like, you know, not in the stupid way the show had him doing it. (Again, sorry I like making you suffer Sammy!!)
Okay. Now that it's out of my system and out of my brain; Imma get back at it. ^_^