Some jokes for the holidays.
Feel free to share these...
- Why are women's breasts like a train set under the Christmas Tree?
- Because they were made for children but Dad wants to play with them.
- Why doesn't Santa have any children?
- Because he only comes once a year and its always down the chimney.
- How are a Christmas Tree and a Priest alike?
- They both have ornamental balls.
- Why is christmas just like a day at the office?
- You do all the work, and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.
- The Sunday before Christmas, a pastor told his congregation that the church needed some extra money. He promised that whoever gave the most would be able to pick out three hymns. A spinster ran up to the alter, handed the priest a check for $5,000 and said, "I'll take him, him, and him."
Here's a couple not related to the holidays, but still good.
- How do you get rid of unwanted pubic hair?
- Spit.
- The Iranian Ambassador to the UN had finished his speech and walked out into the lobby, where he met President Bush. "you know, I have just one question about what I have seen in America," he said. "My son watches Star Trek and on it ther is Checkov, wo is Russian, Scotty, who is Scottish, and Sulu, who is Japanese, but no Iranians. My son is very upset and doesn't understand why there aren't any Iranians on the show."
President Bush laughed and replied, "Thats because it takes place in the future."
And on that note.. Goodnight and Farewell.
- Why are women's breasts like a train set under the Christmas Tree?
- Because they were made for children but Dad wants to play with them.
- Why doesn't Santa have any children?
- Because he only comes once a year and its always down the chimney.
- How are a Christmas Tree and a Priest alike?
- They both have ornamental balls.
- Why is christmas just like a day at the office?
- You do all the work, and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.
- The Sunday before Christmas, a pastor told his congregation that the church needed some extra money. He promised that whoever gave the most would be able to pick out three hymns. A spinster ran up to the alter, handed the priest a check for $5,000 and said, "I'll take him, him, and him."
Here's a couple not related to the holidays, but still good.
- How do you get rid of unwanted pubic hair?
- Spit.
- The Iranian Ambassador to the UN had finished his speech and walked out into the lobby, where he met President Bush. "you know, I have just one question about what I have seen in America," he said. "My son watches Star Trek and on it ther is Checkov, wo is Russian, Scotty, who is Scottish, and Sulu, who is Japanese, but no Iranians. My son is very upset and doesn't understand why there aren't any Iranians on the show."
President Bush laughed and replied, "Thats because it takes place in the future."
And on that note.. Goodnight and Farewell.